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Get it? Get it? Today I’m talking about trains!
Betcha thought this was about me getting a yummy pair of Jimmy Choos, huh? Well no. Although perhaps that would have been a way cooler post.*
Back to choo-choo. I didn’t think much about the train in purchasing a wedding dress, but then I found so many lovely photos you can get with a train. And guess what I realized? Your train can be pretty demanding. It refuses to be left out, and bulldozes its way into every phase of the wedding. Needy, needy train, about to bore down with frightening might and speed on your wedding.
The train getting ready, *without you*. I mean, the TRAIN has its own getting ready pic?
[train speaking:] Bow to me. ’Nuff said. And someone get me a steamer. Bitches.
The train elbowing its way into your bridal shots:
Lady, you and your damn shoes are getting in the way of my photo. And if that heel gets anywhere near me I swear to…
Yeah, scootch over hon. Uh huh and don’t crinkle me either, lift that butt up.
The train crashing your first look:
Huh, you think that’s *your* man? Well guess what he’s really looking at? Yeah, me! He’s only pretending to be excited looking at your face—he’s really just pumped that in a few seconds he’s going to get to reach his hand around your ass and feel me up.
The train tagging along at the ceremony:
Daddy always liked me better. You know it’s true. And just because I don’t have legs to walk on my own doesn’t mean that I’m not Numero Uno.
The train, front and center at your ceremony:
OMG blah blah blah soooo boring.
That’s right, bridesmaids, back the hell up away from my majesty-ness.
The train at your formal portraits:
Who are these riffraff and what are they doing in my picture? Who are you people?
Your train breaking it down, at *your* reception:
Look at me swish! Bride, nobody wants to see your face. This is my time!
And you thought the wedding was about you and your loved one. Aw, that’s so sweet… (look of pity)
Anyone ready to flaunt their train?
*Nowadays I feel like we hear all about the Louboutins and to a certain extent the Manolos—what happened to Jimmy Choo? Where are you Choo fans?
I love my chapel length train 
I’m going to wear a cathedral length veil so I think it’ll be really beautiful. I think they both will make some great photos!
What length is your train?
Although I love the look of Louboutins, Manolos and Jimmy Choos….I would kill myself trying to wear them and I don’t think my pocketbook would like me if I spent that much on a pair, sadly.
I’ve read this line three times, and laughed out loud each time. “And someone get me a steamer. Bitches.” You are hilarious.
It’s true, there is not enough variety in the expensive shoe love.
I loved that line too. Ha ha! I love my train. I don’t know how long it is but for as long as I can remember I wanted a dress that had something going on in the back. I always told my mom that people needed something interesting to look at once I walk past them.
This post cracked me up, especially the “get me a steamer, bitches.” Pug, you’re too cute. Can’t wait to see YOUR train!
Oh! Oh! Choo fan here! Choo Choo!!! Sigh. I love me some Jimmy Choos that I can never ever in my life afford. I can’t even justify it for MY wedding to MYself. Bye Bye Jimmy Choos.
Holy crap. Now I’m going to have to verbalize for my train the whole time I’m wearing the dress. I had no idea she was such an attention whore, but now that you mentioned it, I’m pretty sure she’s been trying to take me out this whole time.
I am wearing Jimmy Choo’s - just get them fresh from Nordstroms in Plum patent leather and they are H O T, heeheehee
Hahahah this is a great post! I was laughing so hard reading it! To cute! I will be having a train! I love them!!
Pug, this post is just too awesome! Can’t wait to hear what your train has to say on its big day!!
OMG! This was great! Darn pushy trains, always trying to get their way!
Beautiful! My favorite image is the first one. The white on the bed and the wedding dress just look gorgeous!!
Love this!! I wonder what my train says about me when I’m not paying attention.
Awesome post. My train is gorgeous, though honestly I’m still a little weirded out by the idea of dragging around all that fabric. Impractical! But so freaking pretty.
But at least my train isn’t 1.2 miles long: http://www.examiner.com/x-5585-Offbeat-News-Examiner~y2009m8d12-Worlds-longest-wedding-train-12–miles-long
Since looking at wedding dresses all I’ve thought of was that lovely long train. I LOVE trains. Which is pretty funny considering that most people would find it strange to see the coveted Cathedral Train (6-8ft) on my less then 5ft body. But gosh darn it I love these flipping trains. I love your captions! It really never accorded to me how many pictures they wind up in though, funny considering i love looking at this long white length of fabric tailing behind me.
You really had me cracking up with all your comments… and also had me thinking about my train, myself.
Choo choo!
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Mrs. Pug, New York City/Half Moon Bay, CA Age and Occupation: 33, Lawyer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 32, ditto Engagement Date: July 2008 Wedding Date: March 2010 Venue: Ritz-Carlton, Half Moon Bay About Me: The Mr. and I are two 30-somethings who enjoy tasty sweets of all kinds, our neighborhood wine store, and cuddling with our pug. NYC is where we live and the city we love, but we’re doing the deed out in Northern California. We are trying to keep the affair small, intimate, and manageable. Our motto is: the less people, the better! (I’m kidding.)
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