Weddingbee Blog

A year ago this winter, I was getting ready to go back to work after winter break, and my boyfriend and I had just come home from seeing Rachel Getting Married. At this time in our relationship, I was starting to feel like I knew he was “the one”, and I was wondering what that would mean for us. I had an idea that he’d felt the same way, as he’d been hinting at it, but I wasn’t sure.

Rachel Getting Married isn’t really a story about a wedding, at least not on its surface. But it does feature several sincere and heartwarming wedding-related scenes, and by the end of the film, I couldn’t help but wonder if this wonderful boyfriend of mine would be with me for our own, real-life wedding scenes. I wanted to know where we were going, but I was afraid to say anything, because I didn’t want to risk being disappointed if we weren’t on the same page. Actually, I was terrified. But I was doubly inspired because the movie is also about overcoming personal issues & fears. So, later that night, I decided to talk to Mr. Oyster about how I’d been feeling, and it ended up being perhaps the most memorable night of my life.

What started as a relationship talk, casually begun while taking down the Christmas tree, turned into an utterly emotional and somewhat unexpected discussion of how we felt for each other. It turns out that I’d had nothing to worry about. It was soon apparent that our feelings were mutual, and when we realized it, we made the mutual decision to be married. Married! Us! The exact moment might have been a surprise, but our engagement really wasn’t. It was like we were just saying out loud the things we’d already known. And from that moment we were together in a way we hadn’t been before. We were different.

Things were so informal that I never made an actual announcement. The next day, I called my mother and my two best friends, and we formally told his parents over dinner a few weeks later. I received a beautiful ring a couple months later.

But on the night of our engagement, there was no ring, no bended knee, no asking anyone’s permission. Just two people in love, who looked at each other and knew, and decided together. I can’t imagine anything more personal or more romantic. Looking back on it now, Mr O says, “It matches our relationship. It’s us.”

*Photo by me