Weddingbee Blog

When MOH Sis Hamster first started planning my bachelorette party, I tried to give my input. Here’s how it went:

Miss Hamster: So… you know I’m not too crazy about oiled-up men and g-strings. I was thinking maybe something more along the lines of a slumber party… or… I really like paint-your-own pottery.

Sis Hamster: Dirty pottery??

Miss Hamster: … No… just regular pottery. Or maybe you know, a party in a library. Nice and quiet.

Sis Hamster: A dirty library???

Miss Hamster: … No….

So, you can imagine my apprehension regarding my bachelorette weekend. Well, the event has come and gone, and I’ve not only emerged unscathed but also had an awesome time! Here’s how it all went down.

It all started Saturday afternoon, when Mr. Hamster accompanied me to an undisclosed location. It looked innocuous enough - we arrived at Billy’s Bakery, where 2 cupcakes and jugs of milk waited for us…

My kinda bachelorette party.

However, things took a turn for the anxious when the accompanying note instructed Mr. Hamster to call a specific number…

and ask for…

“Miss Menage??”

(you know, of “a-Trois” fame)

Oh no. Oh no. What’s going on? Who is this Miss Menage, and what was she going to do with me? Before I knew what was going on, MOH-Sister Hamster and BM A picked me up. I was instructed to close my eyes, as they led me a few blocks to what I could only conclude was my demise into hedonistic debauchery. I was led up an interminable number of steps (OK later I counted and it was 2, but you how nerves make you overestimate things) and was finally allowed to open my eyes.

And what awaited me? Gyrating men and flapping dildos? Miss Menage and her sister Trois? I braced myself for the worst, to be greeted by….

My closest girlfriends, all waiting to greet me at Color Me Mine!

My sister hadn’t shot down my ideas after all! I’m not going to lie—I LOVE paint-your-own pottery. The semi-DIY-ness, the childhood nostalgia—love it.

“Oh thank you thank you for not making this dirty pottery!!”

Everyone picked out their pottery and got busy!

Here are the completed pieces, all ready to be fired up in the kiln:

The fired and completed pieces will be delivered to my apartment any day now - man, you can get anything delivered in NYC! I’m so excited to see them because:

1. The colors look completely different once they are fired up - see that pink plate on the top left? It will become a deep red. The light blue teacup will turn a deep indigo.

2. Apparently, my friends hid little dirty designs throughout their pieces - penis platter, anyone?

We finished off our pottery event with a cake from my absolute favorite bakery in the world - Palisades Bakery in Palisades Park, NJ. I know I’m having a “designer cake“, but if I had my druthers (now where did those druthers go?), I would totally get my wedding cake from here. Their cakes are aaa-mazing! If you’re ever in the area, order their chocolate and yellow cake with chocolate and vanilla/chocolate pudding and chocolate ganache. OMG. They make wedding cakes but don’t deliver them, so sadly, there will be no P-Bakery wedding cake for the Hammies.

“Oh Mah Gah, wait till you ladies try this cake, it’s fantabulous”

And of course, what bachelorette weekend would be complete without an acronym and logo? That’s SLW for “Serena’s Lost Weekend” and a compass with a very…. phallic looking pointer (hee hee).

Lovely ladies, post pottery!

We then made our way to our next destination, also kept a secret from me. It turned out to be:

My favorite hair salon with my favorite hair guy! No joke, I met him when Sis Hamster and I got our hair cut for her wedding, 5 years ago, and he was all, “When are you getting married?” and I was like, “No way man, I’m never getting married!” Well, lookie lookie here.

“Roman, make me look FABULOUS.”

We got our hair and makeup did (”for the strippers tonight,” one friend facetiously told me. Seriously, it never gets old).

We had our pottery session, we were all made up, but what was in store for me next? Stayed tuned…

Was your bachelorette party a surprise?