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Do any of you have other things going on in your life besides planning a wedding? Really? I’m not alone? 
Within a period of about three months, Mr. Turtle and I are both graduating from college, leaving jobs and finding new ones, and moving clear across the country. Oh, and not to mention getting married! On Saturday, Mr. Turtle graduated from college with Bachelors degrees in English Literature and Classics with a Latin Emphasis. We had a wonderful day and I felt so proud of him!
In addition to these joyful life events, in the last few weeks, our family and friends have been experiencing an unbelievable amount of tragedy.
Mr. Turtle and I both find ourselves heartbroken for the people that we love. We’re also stressed about the craziness of getting through finals and meeting deadlines at work. And meanwhile, our invitations still sit unfinished in a box on my kitchen table. Oops… With everything going on, I’ve found myself becoming totally scatterbrained! I’ve been totally neglecting entire areas of my life, and details completely escape me if I’m not careful to write them down! And I must defend myself by saying that this is totally unlike me!
In the midst of all of this craziness, sometimes working on wedding stuff makes me feel guilty and selfish. So many other things just seem more important! But I have also begun to realize that our wedding is something that has the potential to bring such joy and hope to not only us, but all of our friends and family. So this week, (even though it’s my last week of class and I have a million things due), I am totally committed to getting back into wedding mode!
Does your wedding seem to be falling right in the middle of the busiest time of your life? How have you been finding balance?
I totally understand how you feel! It feels selfish to want to talk about wedding stuff when there are more serious things going on. Like you said though, the wedding is a really important and special occasion for you and your guests. Good luck getting back into wedding mode!
Everyone reacts differently to stress, so give yourself a break and don’t forget to breathe! Then pick up the phone and call your bridesmaids or close friends/family who live nearby and ask for their help for a couple hours. This is what I did on Saturday and within 2 hours the wedding area of my life that I had neglected badly suddenly felt like it was back in control. Everyone really does want to help and it’s also time that is good for your soul. Good luck and remember, slow and steady wins the race! 
I am so with you! I am leaving my job, mr. hc is graduating med school, we are moving, we are getting married, and he is starting residency - all before the end of june! I’m with you Turtle!
I’m so sorry for all the hard things you guys are going through, the stressful times. But looking back, I’m sure you will be able to remember the happy moments instead of the overwhelming ones!
Suzannediego has such wise words: Slow and steady wins the race. Be strong and the heaviness and stress that comes with the major milestones in your life–sometimes tragic,sometimes exuberant–will bring you closer to the ones you love and that is indeed good for your soul!
My FI and I have full time jobs (FI is a database administrator and I am a dental hygienist) and we are both in school pursuing our Bachelor’s degree (graduation for me is in May 2011 and FI’s is in the Fall of 2011). I am getting married in October 2010 and have 5 1/2 months left. My mom is undergoing surgery in both her eyes in 1 month and she is expecting me to be there with her. Can I cut myself into pieces so that there could be six of me?
hey turtle–sounds like you have a lot going on, no wonder you’re feeling a little scattered. it’s okay to take a breather and not put pressure on yourself that you have to be doing wedding stuff when it doesn’t quite feel right.
I am so sorry to hear about the stressful things going on in your life right now. I am in a similar boat with graduating from college, starting new jobs, moving, family issues…and the wedding on top of it all. It’s definitely understandable feeling a little out of it and scattered. I am praying the wedding is a touching and hope-giving event for you and everyone in your life! Just take one thing at a time, and one thing that has helped me most is remembering that the people in my life are the most important thing to me, beyond all the wedding stress and graduation and craziness they are the ones who will still be there after the wedding is over and done with. Enjoy all the time you can with them!
All of you girls are so sweet!! I just wanted to say that I didn’t mean for this post to come across as so negative! We just have so much going on that it’s crazy! In addition to all of the sad/stressful things, there are so many good things going on, and we really have so much to be thankful for! It’s nice to hear from so many of you who seem to be in the same boat! Having this sense of community that Weddingbee provides is such an encouragement and blessing!
I hear ya on the busy-ness. I’m finishing grad school and my FI is finishing up his first year back in school, getting a second Bachelor’s. Somehow, we have to get through finals and all final assignments and then we’ll have just two weeks before the wedding.
I’m right there with you…..we got engaged on Feb. 26, are planning our wedding for June 5th (of same year), in the middle of buying our first house (which has been a long stressful process for us), both graduated from grad school last week, moving into our new home in June 17 and both starting our new jobs June 20th. With all that, we’re still planning on going on a 7 day honeymoon cruise then come back to move into the house.
I swear if I didn’t have google calendar, I would be a lost wreck. I put everything there, even reminders and notes to self. Also, I try to not be to focused on every little thing and hope that it’ll all work out. Try to enjoy this time.
Wedding planning has definitely fallen on the busiest time of my life - when it rains it pours! Lots of family stuff, a promotion at work (yea! but also yikes!), moving, school… I know what ya mean with this post!
Hang in there, Turtle! I think you hit the nail on the head when you said that you’re keeping in mind that your wedding will not only bring you joy, but also to friends and family. The guilt is natural in the light of so much loss and sadness around you, but remember that you’re celebrating life’s joys - which are often all to rare!
My MR will graduating 6 months before the wedding! Only 1 year left to go!
I’m with you. In the next few months, I will graduate, Mr. Jelly will deploy, I’ll take the Bar exam, Mr. Jelly will return and then we’ll have the wedding. That seems like a lot already! i’m sorry to hear you’ve had some tragedy in your family. Don’t be afraid to take a break from the wedding when you need to. I totally agree though that the wedding stuff can be a happy outlet.
Yup! We’re moving back to our home state- but we’re not sure where exactly or what jobs we’ll have. My FI already quit his job though! So we’re jumping in with both feet… or diving in head first… or whatever. Not to mention some family health issues (fortunately not tragedies).
The positive flip side to all of this is that it’s incredibly exciting and heartwarming that you can be each other’s support during this challenging time, and that you’re experiencing this life adventure together, forging your path as a couple. (I speak again from experience- we moved across the country twice) Each time my guy and I face a new challenge and work it out together I fall in love a little more (smushy and gross, but true).
Life manages to get in the way, but I just make sure to make time for the things I need to and make time for myself.
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Mrs. Turtle, Central California Age and Occupation: 21, Art Student/Teacher Fiance's Age and Occupation: 22, English Student Engagement Date: August 16, 2008 Wedding Date: July 2010 Venue: Mr. Turtle's Grandparents' backyard, Arroyo Grande, CA About Me: I am a California girl who loves the beach and the mountains, but is quite satisfied living right in the middle where I can enjoy the best of both worlds. I am happiest when traveling to faraway places, wandering through museums, watching old movies, or baking up a storm. Mr. Turtle and I are high school sweethearts and fellow book nerds who both drive Mini Coopers and are most likely to be found browsing in antique stores. We're having so much fun planning our European garden wedding with a vintage twist and can't wait to share more of life's adventures together!
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