Weddingbee Blog

Recently, I showed you the wedding planning binder that I put together for myself and several of my friends. Now I am going to share with you a few of the resources that we have used and that I have subsequently shared with my friends as they are on their own planning journeys. The following three books have been invaluable to Mr. Hermit Crab and me as we plan for our wedding and of course, our marriage.

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The New Jewish Wedding by Anita Diamant was the first book that I bought. I also bought it for all the women involved in the wedding planning with me.

It was extremely helpful in thinking about and planning a Jewish wedding - it explains parts of the engagement and ceremony, and helps us understand different options and history behind the rituals. I recommend this for anyone entering into a Jewish marriage, taking a role in a Jewish wedding, or even attending a Jewish wedding (although in this case, I would probably just take it out from the library). This book helped up find inspiration for the English translation of the Ketubah text that we eventually chose.

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The Wedding Ceremony Planner by Reverend Judith Johnson came as the mostly highly recommended book for ceremony planning, and with good reason. Although our own ceremony will be written mostly by our Rabbi and Jewish tradition, as soon as I found out that I would be officiating at my friend’s wedding, I grabbed a copy of this book for both of us, as well as for my friend who is getting married in October and planning to write his own ceremony with his fiance. This book illustrates formatting and reading options for all different kinds of ceremonies, as well as creating the tone that you would like to have at your wedding. If you’re even thinking about writing your own ceremony, this book is a must.

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Finally, there is, of course, a lot more to a marriage than just the wedding. Since I work at a synagogue, and the rabbi that will be officiating at our wedding currently lives in Florida, the rabbi that I work with here in Syracuse has agreed to meet with Mr. Hermit Crab and me in the months before our wedding. This is one of the books that she gave us to work through together. Although the book uses many Jewish texts and backgrounds, and asks a few Jewish questions, most of the topics that are brought up are important for any couple to talk through before marriage. Though we are only about half way through the book, we’ve already discussed things like the our family issues, name changing and finances. Even though we always try to be honest with each other, we’ve had some of the most important and candid conversations that we’ve had in the five years that we have been together. Despite the Jewish lens, this book is a great way to start and have important conversations that any couple should tackle before the wedding.

Do you have any books or resources that have helped you in your wedding planning? What are they?