Weddingbee Blog

I’ll just start by saying, some things you can’t control. Like, for example, your officiant, who at the rehearsal leaves you with more questions than answers and a strong feeling that things will probably go a bit awry come wedding day… JUST SAYIN’.

Also, this is another long post. Sorry! (All images by our friend, Graham, and other wedding guests.)

That’s the look of “Oh boy, this is going to be interesting.” Father Jim is in the background still telling a story.

So, it’s still the Friday, the day before the wedding. We just finished with our (half-baked) tea ceremony, and we rushed back to our rooms to change for the rehearsal in the garden. People were still arriving at that point—and by “people” I mean our bridal party.

I should have been worried that they might be late (have I mentioned I’m Type B?), but I just told them to show up around 4-ish (the rehearsal was to start at 4:30). Promptness, as we will find out at the wedding, is a HUGE sticking point for our officiant, Father Jim.

Tip #1: Buffer time. Add at least 30 minutes to any activity for late arrivals and dilly-dallying.

Father Jim is 80 something years old, a little stubborn, a lot crotchety, and loves his Scotch. He also likes to spin a good yarn. He’ll tell the same story, over and over and over. He is such a character and we love him. He’s a family friend, and coincidentally presided over a congregation there in Hot Springs years ago, so knows everyone at the Homestead well. He’s also very demanding and was adamant about who controls the rehearsal: he does.

That meant our clear-thinking coordinator, Esme, had to watch her step and not say much (she knows Father Jim well). That also meant he was the one who was supposed dole out instructions and cues–but he skipped over all that and just told stories of other weddings and their mishaps. Like the time the ring was put into an officiant’s hand, who promptly keeled over, still clutching the ring. Nice! It’s funny now, and it was actually very comical then, to hear him go on! Perhaps I should have been more concerned. Again: Type B I am.

Here’s how it went down:

Everyone arrived. Giddy and all smiles. It was really bright out, and I was a little concerned about the heat and squinting that might happen on wedding day (but still so excited and happy!). However as the afternoon sun started to set, it morphed into the perfect light.

Details of the garden and the eventual slightly overcast light. Perfect.

The ceremony site: The Spa Garden. Esme had just the first row set up for the rehearsal, and made name cards for our important guests. Graham is the (now) fiance of Michelle, who read at the wedding. So while Father Jim was “in charge”, Esme made sure things happened.

Tip #2: Make sure you have a GREAT wedding coordinator, and make sure she’s there for the rehearsal (even if she’s just a DOC).

Places everyone! We worked backwards, starting with the ceremony. Esme making recommendations for where to put the table for the Eucharist.

My input on where things should go…

But Father Jim (and his cane) had the final say! Then we asked where Michelle, our reader, was to stand. “What reader?” Asked Father Jim. Grrr, the one we told you about. [All the way] “Over there,” says Father Jim. But you can’t hear her from there. “Okay, you can move in a little closer, honey.”

Michelle was not amused.

But BMs O and E (cousin and sister, respectively) were definitely amused, chuckling the whole time. I had no idea what to think.

Having straightened all that out, the procession walk-through began. First up, mother of the groom with brother M, the best man. (My mother would be escorting me.)

Father Jim happily presiding…

After all three groomsmen, the groom!!! Mr. P’s parents looking on as if they’re thinking “Finally, there he goes!”

All the guys lined up! In the top picture, Mr. P is scratching his collar as if to say “Is it me or is hot in here?” And groomsman, B, seems to be saying “This is going to get gooooood!” Then the ladies start walking in… I like all the guys’ expressions!

I believe it was for my sister as she strutted in… [cue sexy 70s bass music] bow-chicka-bow-bow.

This is a family show! Next up, the kiddies: Mr. P’s niece and nephew (aka flower girl and ring-bearer)

And finally, me and my mom. “Stand right here,” says Esme, taking the chance to put some order into things. “I’ll cue the music, and fluff your train, then you’ll be ready.” Her bossy-ness was reassuring. Note that my mom has her arm in mine. I knew that I’d have to hold up my gown to walk the next day, so that was on purpose. And I really didn’t care that things were going a little haphazardly at the rehearsal, I was feeling happy!

This part is interesting. Father Jim goes quickly through the “presentation by the parent” part… but does a sort of “yada yada yada.” My mom wasn’t sure what cue she should take for hugging me and sitting down. This is important, and will play out rather strangely in the real ceremony. So, after yada yada, hug daughter. Got it.

“Dearly beloved… and so and so forth, yada, yada.” Ooookay! This will also play out in an interesting way next day!

Then somehow we moved on to the Eucharist part… which, clearly, Mr. P was bored by. Classic!

I love this picture. My sister is saying something to the effect of “This is going to be alllll jacked up.” And somehow I just laughed. Because really, how messed up can it be? At the end of the (next day), we’ll be married and that’s what’s important.

Tip #3: Perspective. Chill, ladies, chill. It should be a happy experience, and not necessarily a perfect one. You risk missing the experience of the true meaning of your day if you get caught up in perfection.

Mr. P (who is most definitely Type A) was also not worried.

And with that, we joined hands, and walked back up the aisle!

…with our dear friends and family behind us…

And afterwards, Esme debriefed us, trying to instill some sort of order. The guys laughed, the girls listened intently, and the kids played and posed for pictures…

Then we were off to our Welcome Dinner at the Garth Newell Music Center barn!!! And I couldn’t wait.

While we were rehearsing, almost all of the 80 or so guests showed up that night for the dinner. See more in the next post!

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Previously:

Macarons and Marié : The Tea Ceremony, Half-Baked
Macarons and Marié: Assembly Required
Macarons and Marié: The Gathering
Macarons and Marié: The Highlights
Macarons and Marié: Last Minute, Low Key Bachelorette