Just Call Me Bashful

Just Call Me Bashful

May 14th, 2010 @ 12:46 pm by Mrs. Lace
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In high school and college, I used to be a pretty loud and outgoing girl. I wasn’t terribly shy. I was quick to make friends and enjoyed being in the spotlight. If you walked into a birthday party, I’d be the one talking loudly and laughing. I’d be the one loudly convincing everyone to do something. I’d be the one volunteering to get up in front of everyone to do something silly.

However, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more introverted, enjoying more time to myself. I’d rather go unnoticed. I don’t like having eyes on me. If you walked into a birthday party, I’d be sitting in the room on the side with my closest friends chit chatting. If I had to be in the main room, I’d be sitting on the side, listening and watching, letting someone else steal the spotlight.

I think the change has to do with insecurity issues and growing up. Being tired and stressed out might also play a role in it, but who knows. However, as Mr. Lace and I spend more time on what our wedding day is going to look like, I’m beginning to experience a bit of anxiety at the thought of having all eyes on me. I kept telling Mr. Lace that all eyes would be on us… you know, as a couple, where the attention would be split 50-50, but Mr. Lace reminded me that although people would look at him, the ratio would probably be more like 80% on me, 20% on him. Wait, wait, wait… so, you’re saying…

225 guests x 2 eyes each = 450 eyes
450 eyes x 20% = 90 eyes on Mr. Lace
450 x 80% = 360 eyes on me

YIKES! I’m totally feeling shy about having that many pairs of eyes on me. I’m going to feel awkward and weird having everyone looking my way. Just call me Bashful!

(source)

There’s not a whole lot that I can do about this except to not choose activities that draw MORE attention to us and if possible, deflect attention on others (or at least share). After thinking about this, I’m hoping all those eyes will fade into the background when I focus on what’s happening between me and Mr. Lace. We’re getting married. We’re making a commitment to be faithful to one another forever. We promise to support one another through everything. I’m hoping that focusing on this will keep me from thinking about the many eyes that will be looking on our way.

Are you psyched for the attention you’ll get on your wedding day? Or are you completely nervous? If so, what are you doing to cope?

Tags: emotional, pasadena |

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18 Responses to “Just Call Me Bashful”

Member

aunt pol (message) 1,473 posts, Bumble bee

That’s a lot of eyes !! Lol but, the main thing is, you’re not goin dancin in the mall infront of that many strangers. These are your friends and family. Enjoy!

5/14/10 @ 12:54 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Lace (message) 702 posts, Busy bee

@aunt pol: This is true, but you know how sometimes it’s MORE embarrassing when it’s people you know?!

5/14/10 @ 12:56 pm (reply)

Member

upstatebroad (message) 342 posts, Helper bee

I am feeling the same way! I was also very outgoing when I was younger and although I still am, I have also calmed down and no longer like to be the center of attention.

I have a feeling that it will be overwhelming once you get to the church but, just look ahead at the man you are going to be marrying because that’s the only thing that should matter. The ceremony will be the hardest to get through but once it’s done, i’m sure the butterflies will go away and you can enjoy the reception with everyone that loves you and wants to be a part of your day!

5/14/10 @ 1:05 pm (reply)

Member

kate169 (message) 2,227 posts, Buzzing bee

That’s why we’re only inviting around eighty of our closest peeps

5/14/10 @ 1:06 pm (reply)

Member

Ms Scrabble (message) 48 posts, Newbee

Oh Miss Lace, this is why God created alcohol! Just kidding… sort of. But I definitely plan on have a glass or two of champagne before heading down the aisle for exactly this reason.

5/14/10 @ 1:15 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Lace (message) 702 posts, Busy bee

@Ms Scrabble: I’m totally not a drinker, but I may need to have a chambord and 7 before i walk. Good idea!

@kate169: Now that would’ve been a good idea! that’s only 160 pairs of eyes!

@upstatebroad: Right. I’m hoping that when I walk down the aisle, I’ll fixate on Mr. Lace and I’ll feel completely calm.

5/14/10 @ 1:19 pm (reply)

Member

winter (message) 1,333 posts, Bumble bee

i totally was nervous in front of everyone cause I knew that everyone was going ot be watching us and i got nervous….i am just like you too outgoing when im with friends but when all those people were watching it was nerve racking!

5/14/10 @ 2:06 pm (reply)

Member

Goldilocks1107 (message) 2,504 posts, Sugar bee

I’m so nervous! I’ve also experienced a similar shift - give me a corner as opposed to a spotlight any day!

5/14/10 @ 2:11 pm (reply)

Member

alivoo01 (message) 2,622 posts, Sugar bee

I’m a little bit of both! I’m excited because it’s the ONE day my entire life that I will be beautified and everyone will be there to witness it. On the other hand, I’m not sure how I feel about everyone sitting at the ceremony fixating their vision on me and only I will be in motion…

5/14/10 @ 4:07 pm (reply)

10.

Member

puzzle (message) 248 posts, Helper bee

@MissLace….I know what you mean that being in the spot light can be *more* embarassing infront of family and friends. But remember: this is a good kind of embarassment…it’s not showing up at school in your underwear!

5/14/10 @ 4:27 pm (reply)

11.

Member

hugrad (message) 103 posts, Blushing bee

I completely understand how you feel. My coordinator said she will just give me a few shots before I head down the aisle

5/14/10 @ 4:40 pm (reply)

12.

Member

tea (message) 7,288 posts, Bee Keeper

as a self-described attention whore, i am totally looking forward to that on the wedding day. not so sure about the mister though.

5/14/10 @ 8:27 pm (reply)

13.

Bee

Miss Seahorse (message) 156 posts, Blushing bee

My plan is to be too busy thinking “omg we’re getting married!” to worry about people looking at me… mostly that’s my plan because if I think about all the people who will be watching me, I freak out a little bit. Getting all emotional and being so open in front of a ton of people? Totally terrifying! But standing up with someone I love and telling *her* how I feel, and being surrounded by people I love - putting that spin on it makes it feel manageable. Especially when I, again, tell myself I’ll be too busy thinking about *her* and *us* to realize people are watching.

5/15/10 @ 2:31 pm (reply)

14.

Member

krissybee (message) 3,921 posts, Honey bee

i’m nervous too!! i like being celebrated but i gotta say there is so much pressure!!! and that causes me alot of anxiety just thinking about it. i’m hoping me and my FI will be by each other all night and take some of the attention away from just me

5/16/10 @ 7:34 pm (reply)

15.

Bee

Miss Argyle (message) 2,516 posts, Sugar bee

I haven’t even thought about this. I used to do competitive gymnastics and cheered in college, so I’m sort of used to people watching me, but not like a wedding. At the wedding everyone knows you! Eeks!

5/17/10 @ 12:39 am (reply)

16.

Member

ktisthatbees (message) 2,742 posts, Sugar bee

Don’t be nervous!!! I know I know, easier said than done. But seriously, you are having a PROFESSIONAL do your hair and makeup and there will be several people there helping you look flawless on this day, so if there was ever a time for all eyes to be on you, it is this one!!! Besides, your wedding guests are there because they love and support both of you, they will not be judging!!! (or at least they shouldn’t be) Just bask in the glow of being a bride!!! Don’t try to be the wallflower . . you are the main event!

5/17/10 @ 10:56 am (reply)

17.