Setting the Tone

Setting the Tone

July 4th, 2010 @ 1:00 pm by Mrs. Socks
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Today I’m thinking about the “tone” of our wedding. I have to continually remind myself that we are not getting married in a field or vineyard like we originally planned.

We’re also not getting married in a barn or a park or on a farm.

We are getting married in the city, and I want our wedding to LOOK like we’re getting married in the city! Yes, I still gravitate toward cotton/craspedia/ranunculus bouquets:

Setting the Tone : wedding decor philadelphia Cotton

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Setting the Tone : wedding decor philadelphia Cotton 01

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And I don’t think these are necessarily reflective of “big city livin’” but…

OMIGOSHIDON’TCAREIWANTIT.

Inevitably, as soon as I see things like that, I spiral into inspiration for a wedding that isn’t mine. I can’t even tell you how many posts I’ve started to write when half-way through, I read it over and say, “Oh. No, I don’t think that fits.”

Fitting this wedding is difficult, I must say. It’s urban, it’s somewhat chic, and let’s face it, certain blogs that have the power to deem some weddings prettier than others seem to lean toward fields and tents and rural weddings. Yeah, they’re absolutely gorgeous weddings, but they aren’t ours.

I’ve especially had trouble designing our invitations. For whatever reason, the idea for our STDs came to me and were automatically perfect, but the invites… whooo boy, these suckers are DIFFICULT.

So I decided to write down my goals for what I’d like the tone of our wedding to be to help me narrow down my ideas:

Upscale. I want our guests to feel like they’re being treated with the best of the best that evening.
Personal. I don’t want it to be SO upscale that it shadows who Mike and I are as a couple. Having cute-but-not-cutesy details and personal touches will still keep the party grounded.
Seamless. The evening should flow naturally from the ceremony to the cocktail hour, and from dinner into dancing. I’d like all of the details to blend in as well-everything should “belong” there and not look like a million different wedding crafts and ideas exploded on my wedding.
Cool. (Is it ironic that I feel like a dork as I describe how cool I want my wedding to be?) The music should be pumping, wine and craft beer should be flowing, and food should be stuffed down my throat-I mean-delicately eaten with enthusiastic “yums”. If it’s a nice evening, the front windows will be opened up, and the fireplaces will be on. Cool is definitely a priority.

What is the tone of your wedding? Do you have a hard time sticking to it?

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21 Responses to “Setting the Tone”

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Guest

http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash1/hs263.ash1/19049_554863098167_42601268_32561892_7869242_n.jpg

I was drawn to similar bouquets with our yellow/gray wedding, but we too had a city wedding but i felt my florist did a wonderful job capturing both feels i liked with the addition of berries and yarrow and then some more impact flowers like the roses. Also i did not find this size of my bouquet overwhelming which was important to me.

better size picture:
http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs163.snc3/19049_554863123117_42601268_32561897_391255_n.jpg

7/4/10 @ 1:34 pm (reply)

Member

soontobemrandmrsfinck (message) 34 posts, Newbee

I am very much the opposite! My finace and I are from Texas, but are getting married in our hometown in Indiana. We are trying to make it as “texas” as we can, but our town is very modern… it’s been difficult to keep things in perspective. I know how you’re feeling!!! I’m sure your wedding will be BEAUTIFUL!!!

7/4/10 @ 1:47 pm (reply)

Member

crayfish (message) 4,844 posts, Honey bee

Im getting married at a museum of contemporary art, and I totally agree that super modern/cool city inspiration has been tougher to come by. I wiped the slate clean and designed everything myself, which has been amazing. BTW, you could *totally* use that bouquet in a very modern city way if you replaced the cotton with succulents, or something “fun” like yellow/gray pinwheels :-).

7/4/10 @ 2:10 pm (reply)

Member

tritaratops (message) 110 posts, Blushing bee

Yes, I also have three guiding inspiration ideas that I kind of run my wedding ideas through as a filter so it doesn’t get too crazy:
Meaningful, Elegant & Fun

If it doesn’t seem to fit under those, I’m not making it a priority.

7/4/10 @ 2:14 pm (reply)

Member

winter (message) 1,333 posts, Bumble bee

i love the bouquet and dont worry you will be able to have everything that you want!

7/4/10 @ 2:19 pm (reply)

Member

ktbrady (message) 1,054 posts, Bumble bee

I think my tone is colorful, flowerful, and fun. Is that a tone? Or a theme? Or just, um, random inspiration?

7/4/10 @ 3:12 pm (reply)

Member

Jamielee (message) 142 posts, Blushing bee

I struggled with this at first, too. I LOVE the look of rustic/backyard weddings, but my venue and dress are vintage/romantic/victorian. I had such a hard time ignoring inspiration that I loved but did not fit my wedding, and for a while, it really made me second guess my choices. It just took a while, and while I still love the rustic look, I’m able to say “that’s beautiful, but it doesn’t fit my “big picture.” I still have a binder full of rustic inspiration, and it’s still fun to look through:)

7/4/10 @ 3:37 pm (reply)

Member

LittlestBirds (message) 2,605 posts, Sugar bee

I laughed at your line about certain blogs with the power to deem certain weddings prettier than others. And I feel for you, because I agree that the world of wedding inspiration these days overwhelmingly pushes toward rural and natural inspiration. Heck, these weddings are so numerous on the blogs that even though the concept fits our wedding perfectly, the sheer number of sub-genres has become our boondoggle - do I tell our florist we’re going for barnyard-chic, or garden-in-the-woods naturalist, or Tuscan winery? Do those visions even clash as much as I think they do? I imagine that trying to plan an urban wedding in the face of all that barrage of tents and fields would make you feel seriously pulled in a million different directions. On the one hand, you want your wedding to be the wedding you love and incorporate the details that make you swoon, but on the other hand, you don’t want your wedding to be a confusing clash of settings! I think the solution is to immerse yourself in what inspiration you are able to find for the modern, upscale urban wedding you’re having, and remind yourself that you love it too. Good luck.

7/4/10 @ 4:37 pm (reply)

Bee

Mrs. Mouse (message) 5,844 posts, Bee Keeper

Love the cotton! I’ve never seen that before. I think you could definitely make that work with your aesthetic and “feel.” Lovely.

7/4/10 @ 7:38 pm (reply)

10.

Member

brwneyedgrl (message) 186 posts, Blushing bee

I know exactly how you feel. All the wedding inspiration and styled photo shoots are for rustic, outdoor weddings in the country, someone’s backyard or a vineyard. We can’t all have those. We ended up with a very modern, urban venue. I’m trying to keep things as clean as possible and saving the rustic ideas for my shower.

7/4/10 @ 8:11 pm (reply)

11.

Bee

Miss Cardigan (message) 8,645 posts, Bee Keeper

Those bouquets are absolutely fabulous! I definitely agree that the inspiration out there tends to be skewed towards more rustic weddings, but I’m pretty confident that your wedding is going to be amazing.

7/4/10 @ 8:22 pm (reply)

12.

Bee

Miss Pin Cushion (message) 1,012 posts, Bumble bee

Ah, “wedding craft explosion”. I think many a-DIY bride has feared this look. I think it’s a great idea that you laid out what your goals are. I’m sure it will look fab!

7/4/10 @ 10:27 pm (reply)

13.

Guest

corrinla

new fashion is here.

7/5/10 @ 4:15 am (reply)

14.

Member

kristindesigner (message) 53 posts, Worker bee

Miss Socks, just go for the bouquet! I’m finding that your best personal style will be represented if you simply collect the things you love. I had a style board and a total inspiration gallery put together, but as I’ve started putting together the big pieces (venue, dress, photography), I’m finding the final look will be a bit different than what I envisioned. And I love it even more than my style board because it will be perfectly me! Besides, I think the natural feel of the textures in that bouquet would be a really neat contrast to the modern city look of downtown Philly. Ladder 15 has a lot of rich wood in it, right? That will definitely help pull together any natural elements you go with!

7/5/10 @ 9:47 am (reply)

15.

Member

sapphirebride (message) 1,747 posts, Bumble bee

Totally here with you. Our wedding is in the city on New Year’s Eve–not exactly wedding blog territory. I like it though–we’ve had to come up with our own inspiration and that’ll make it much more “us.” While pretty, our life just isn’t soft and pretty and quaint and full of tea-cups and big grassy fields. It’s loud and “now.”

7/5/10 @ 10:38 am (reply)

16.

Guest

allonym

The designers who are making our invitations have lots of clean, modern designs. My favorite is probably this custom one inspired by subway maps: http://izzyandthebean.blogspot.com/2009/10/subway-sweetheards-louisa-and-adam.html
We’re going with something totally different, but this would be perfect for a city wedding!

7/5/10 @ 11:35 am (reply)

17.

Bee

Miss Octopus (message) 1,446 posts, Bumble bee

Ugh, I feel you on having a tough time coming up with inspiration pictures! Specifically, because my wedding is all about bright, bold, jewel-toned colors, and CERTAIN BLOGS might make you think that all weddings exist in shades of peach, pale pink, and ivory.

7/5/10 @ 11:36 am (reply)

18.

Bee

Miss Seashell (message) 1,713 posts, Bumble bee

I agree, Socks! Most definitely the “thing” right now is rustic. I LOVE IT, but it’s not our wedding - or yours. The industry is definitely forcing us to incorporate all things vintage, soft, rolling meadows, muted tones and it just doesn’t work with a city chic venue.

7/5/10 @ 1:20 pm (reply)

19.

Guest

Steph

I just have to jump in and repeat what everyone else said — I know exactly what you mean! I keep saving inspiration pictures of casual outdoor daytime weddings, and constantly have to remind myself that my wedding will be inside a ballroom AT NIGHT! It’s very tricky! =)

7/5/10 @ 3:52 pm (reply)

20.