Weddingbee Blog

Years ago, when I was single, I had a dream that it was my wedding day, and I didn’t have a dress. People were running around, there were some flowers, and my mother and I were staring at the closet thinking, “What shall I wear?” Eventually we chose some old dress and some earrings. But it wasn’t what I really wanted.

Apparently my mother, having known I’d meet someone someday, had sent me a beautiful Vera Wang dress. But the dress was so unbelievably beautiful and my prospects for marriage so far away that I couldn’t imagine it, and I had sent the dress back. And there I was, having spent so much time in disbelief that I refused to believe anything good was coming my way, and inadvertently ruined a day that was so important to me.

I told my mom about the dream and she, being much more religious than I, said that this dream was a message. It meant that I needed to believe that good things could happen for me, and that I should “get ready.”

Well, I did.

Eventually I went from despondent disbelief to happy expectation, and two years ago today, met Mr. Oyster. Apparently he is also one for visions and dreams; he told me after we were engaged that when he first met me, he’d imagined me in a wedding dress.

Here I am, on my wedding day (with a dress!), and as ready as I’ll ever be. From the moment we decided to marry, I’ve tried to enjoy everything about our engagement, from the initial congratulations of friends and family (and strangers!), to the disputes I may or may not have had with Mr. Oyster, to the unsolicited advice I may or may not have gotten from family members, to the anxieties and wedding-related freak outs and the blissful anticipation. Because each and every one of those things, whether they were joyful or heartbreaking, all meant that Mr. Oyster and I were joining our lives together and those of our families, and that a great change was taking place.

When I got engaged, one of my best friends said to me, “Hey, girl! It’s weddin’ time!” And so it is. The past few weeks have contained the usual whirlwind of pre-wedding things…

Opening a few early-arrival gifts (with the help of a certain cat)

Wrapping a bunch of gifts

The arrival of our congratulatory note from the President

One or two last minute projects (I’ll show you later how these earrings were creatively used)

A computer screen that constantly looks like this:

and driving all around the state with appointments, meetings, and greeting happy family members… and a trip or two (or four) to the airport.

I mentioned in another post my belief that planning a wedding and preparing for marriage are linked. This, our wedding, is our first presentation to the world as a couple; a public declaration of our intention to start our lives together. Everything has been planned, ordered, prepared, scheduled, and engineered to make this the best day possible, and I hope it is.

At the moment, I feel like I’m on one of those roller coasters; you spend all this time on different twists and turns, but all the sudden everything slows down and you go up, up, up… and you stop before the big drop, and in that moment you can see everything clearly; you can see for miles; it’s a beautiful view of where you’ve been and where you’re headed. You know you’re going to go down, and it’s going to be incredibly fun and a little scary all at once, and will be over too soon. You know that there are many ahead of you that have already done it, and some behind you that will go afterwards, but it’s still your turn and your experience will be like no one else’s.

Part of me feels completely unready for this, but mostly, I feel as though I’ve been ready my whole life.

Bridal portrait by Heather Essian