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Mrs. Cola, Mountain View, CA Age and Occupation: 27, Product Communications and Promotions Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Managing Partner and Senior Designer Engagement Date: March 5, 2009 Wedding Date: June 2010 Venue: The Mountain Terrace, Woodside, CA About Me: I’m a Washington State native, enjoying life in Silicon Valley California with my fiancé, our three kitties and one leopard gecko. I like reading wedding blogs, Photoshopping wedding design mock ups, making lists, and planning, planning, planning! I’m a bit of an anomaly, on one side I’m a very girlie girl, I collect shoes, I lay out my outfits 4-6 weeks in advance, and I’d never leave the house without my hair curled and makeup on. But on the other side, I’m a total tomboy, I love to go camping and hiking, play drinking games (hey, I’m Irish!) and most of my closest friends are guys. My fiancé and I are planning a DIY-focused wedding with a balance between easygoing (what he wants) and chic and stylish (what I want), and are tying it all together with elements in lavender, sage, butter cream and chocolate.
About Mrs. Cola

How To Pee At Your Party

July 19th, 2010 @ 1:05 pm by Mrs. Cola

Alright, it’s time to lay down some wedding day wisdom regarding peeing!

I know this is something we’ve all thought about, or will have to think about. How the heck do you use the restroom in a wedding dress? It’s not easy, no matter how you look at it, that’s for sure. Especially if you have a dress with lots of material and poof, like an A-line or ball gown.

After purchasing my dress back in October, I looked on the Weddingbee boards and Googled for advice on how exactly to go about doing this. There was no way I was gonna hold it all night, and the ridonk rumor about bridal diapers wasn’t something I’d ever consider! But I basically found the same advice over and over, to get help from one of your bridesmaids.

Would you like to see a little illustration on the recommended way of peeing in a wedding gown, and the different way I found that works better? I thought so!

(And yeah, even though I’m a pretty dedicated blogger, I didn’t have someone take pictures of me in the bathroom so I could blog about it. You’ll have to make do with my lame line drawings. Apparently I’m pretty good at Photoshop, but not so much when it comes to actually drawing something in Illustrator!)

First, grab your MOH and enter the handicapped stall in the bathroom together.

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet

Facing away from the toilet, have your MOH lift up your dress from behind.

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet01

Back toward the toilet, with your MOH standing behind you, squished up next to one side of the toilet.

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet02

Sit down, with her holding your dress up over the back of the toilet.

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet03

OK, so I had a lot of problems with this recommended way of relieving yourself. First, I’m not a big fan of doing my business in front of people. We definitely have a “closed door” policy in our house! Plus, holding your dress up above your head could easily pull out your bustle, or potentially mess up your hair if the dress bumps into the back of your head. Not to mention the fact that you’ll have to interrupt the fun that your MOH or bridesmaid is having at your reception, and drag them off the dance floor to attend to your bladder’s needs.

So I thought I’d share the way I peed at my party with you all, because I found it a lot easier to pull off!

First, enter the handicapped stall by yourself.

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet04

Approach the toilet, facing the toilet, and pull up the front of your dress.

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet05

Take off your panties so they are either only on one leg, or you can take them off altogether.

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet06

Straddle the toilet, continuing to hold the front of your dress up. Get rid of all that champagne you’ve been drinking all night! ;)

How To Pee At Your Party :  wedding humor mountain view Toilet07

And….that’s it! It’s SO much easier than the two person alternative, and as a bonus, you’ll get some alone time. In fact, this was the only time I had to myself our entire wedding day (the bathroom was empty except for me), and I relished the couple of minutes by myself, not having to talk to people!

So tell me, have you given this much though yet? Which way will you be peeing while wearing your wedding dress?

Tags: humor, mountain-view |
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95 Responses to “How To Pee At Your Party”

1 2 3 4 5 

1.
PrncssDva
Member
PrncssDva (message)  5,911 posts, Bee Keeper

I actually like your method, because I am private also. Thanks for the images lol

 
2.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Pin Cushion (message)  1,012 posts, Bumble bee

Hahaha! Oh my gosh! This post is too much. I guess one of the benefits of having not-too-big-of-a-dress is not having to worry about this.

 
3.
TheFutureMcBride
Member
TheFutureMcBride (message)  4,479 posts, Honey bee

Since my MOH is my sister, I don’t care if she comes in the potty with me. We’ve peed in front of each other our whole lives, so I’m pretty lucky. This said, I will be peeing looking at the tank because I’m clumsy and scared I’ll dunk my dress in the toilet.

 
4.
Member Icon
Member
MissDonnaAnne (message)  280 posts, Helper bee

I feel like this was prompted by the recent episode of bethenny getting married! So funny! Yet useful!

 
5.
gc762
Member
gc762 (message)  121 posts, Blushing bee

Love the diagrams! This post reminds me of the wedding episode of Bethenny Getting Married? when she pees in the ice bucket! I think your method is probably better. :)

 
6.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Husky (message)  1,754 posts, Buzzing bee

This is hilarious! Thanks for stick-person demo.

 
7.
Mrs. Dolphin
Bee
Mrs. Dolphin (message)  503 posts, Busy bee

Love the illustrations! Since my dress was easy to take on and off, after our ceremony I actually took my dress off in the stall and hung it on the purse hook. It felt fabulous to ‘air out’ after our May outdoor wedding. Plus it gave me a chance to do my business alone, although my MOH, a bridesmaid, my groom and a groomsmen were all outside my stall (awkward) haha.

 
8.
jordynrose
Member
jordynrose (message)  6,351 posts, Bee Keeper

You are hilarious! This post litteraly made me laugh out loud. I must admit that your method looks far superior to the bridesmaid back-up. I will definitely keep this in mind for my wedding day.

 
9.
sboston06
Member
sboston06 (message)  797 posts, Busy bee

Seriously genius Mrs. Cola! My sister was a classy bride and got pics taken with ALL of us in the bathroom with her. I do not want to repeat the performance on my wedding day. I will definitely be using your method!

 
10.
didymoose3
Member
didymoose3 (message)  84 posts, Worker bee

How insightful! And your graphics are cracking me up! I <3 MS Paint illustrations!

 
11.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Cola (message)  2,868 posts, Sugar bee

@MissDonnaAnne and @gc762: I’m intrigued by your mentions of the Bethenny Getting Married show, I’ve seen it listed on the guide, but never stopped to watch. I think I’m going to have to go look up this ice bucket episode, sounds hilarious!

 
12.
Member Icon
Member
Curlysue (message)  1,703 posts, Bumble bee

HAHA You are too funny :) Love those drawings there.

What I’m concerned about, peeing while wearing Spanx. There is no way I can take them off with it under the crinie and long-line bra and dress and I refuse to pee through the crotch hole—SO I guess I won’t be drinking much that evening.

 
13.
Miss Cardigan
Bee
Miss Cardigan (message)  8,645 posts, Bee Keeper

Okay, so this post is hilarious. BUT, very helpful! I’ll definitely be using your method!

 
14.
Member Icon
Member
fromcharleston (message)  651 posts, Busy bee

Bahaha I love the illustrations!!! I’m totally ok peeing in front of my girlfriends, so I think I’d stick with the first method. My BFF is down, as evidenced by the following conversation a few months ago:
Me: “I will hold your wedding dress for you while you pee.”
K: “I will wipe for you, now that’s dedication!”
Thanks for the info though! I would never have thought of your way.

 
15.
Kemi82JP
Member
Kemi82JP (message)  749 posts, Busy bee

HAHAHAHAHHA!!!! that is hysterical!! i have no issues going in front of any of my friends, we do that all the time actually, so i wasn’t worried about getting help… i was worried when i had to go #2! I always get that side effect when I’m nervous and of course I was nervous right before the ceremony. So my MOH, in all her blessed glory and best friendedness, helped me when I had to do that!! I couldn’t believe she was willing to do that and we’re close enough that I don’t care… it was pretty funny actually! And thankfully, for her sake more than mine, over with quickly :) sorry if that’s TMI, it was just so funny!!

 
16.
Mrs. French Fries
Bee
Mrs. French Fries (message)  2,218 posts, Buzzing bee

Yesssssssss! I totally peed the exact. same. way. (Solidarity?!? haha) Being that my dress had a freaking HOOP SKIRT, it was the only way for me to fly, being modest myself. :) I love your illustrations!

 
17.
CorgiTales
Member
CorgiTales (message)  9,861 posts, Bee Keeper

@curlysue– i have thought of this too, and I came to a decision. My spanx will not be making it through the night. I’ll have them on for our first look and the ceremony and the pics right after the ceremony. But the first time I pee I will take them off and leave them behind. If my tummy looks slightly larger in the dancing photos from the end of the night– so be it. But I will NOT be worrying about peeing all night long :)

 
18.
bklynldy
Member
bklynldy (message)  186 posts, Blushing bee

what — you did not think of peeing in a champagne bucket like Bethany did LOL

but seriously — My first wedding — I took the damn dress off in the private bridal room bathroom (handicapped sized) tinkled away in peace and then put it back on. But my gown was not a hard one to get in and out of and that was easier to me than holding it up

 
19.
shaydenise
Member
shaydenise (message)  1,151 posts, Bumble bee

This. was. hilarious. lol. Definitely good advice because I’m not too keen on peeing with my bridal party either ha ha.

 
20.
Guest Icon
Guest
marie

omg i am bookmarking this post! you are my hero!

 
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Mrs. Cola
Mrs. Cola

Mrs. Cola, Mountain View, CA Age and Occupation: 27, Product Communications and Promotions Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Managing Partner and Senior Designer Engagement Date: March 5, 2009 Wedding Date: June 2010 Venue: The Mountain Terrace, Woodside, CA About Me: I’m a Washington State native, enjoying life in Silicon Valley California with my fiancé, our three kitties and one leopard gecko. I like reading wedding blogs, Photoshopping wedding design mock ups, making lists, and planning, planning, planning! I’m a bit of an anomaly, on one side I’m a very girlie girl, I collect shoes, I lay out my outfits 4-6 weeks in advance, and I’d never leave the house without my hair curled and makeup on. But on the other side, I’m a total tomboy, I love to go camping and hiking, play drinking games (hey, I’m Irish!) and most of my closest friends are guys. My fiancé and I are planning a DIY-focused wedding with a balance between easygoing (what he wants) and chic and stylish (what I want), and are tying it all together with elements in lavender, sage, butter cream and chocolate.

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