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On my bachelorette trip to Vegas (more on that to come!) Momma found the perfect MOB dress! It was a very unexpected and lucky find… we had been perusing BCBG (because lil’ sis is a huge fan) when we came across the clearance rack and found a very pretty dress in Mom’s size.
It was this lovely Tiered Satin and Lace Gown:
Mom snatched it up and headed to the fitting room right away (after all, the clearance price could be anywhere from 30-70% off). As soon as she stepped out both lil’ sis and I knew it was perfect and when Momma did a once over in the mirror she got that giddy look on her face too. The only thing holding her back at that moment was the price.
It was originally marked $498.00, but it could have been up to 70% off (which is what we were all hoping for) bringing the price to a mere $149.00. Unfortunately, Lady Luck turned on us, the dress was only marked down 30% bringing it to $348.60, which was about $100 more than the dress Mom already found somewhere else. We left the store empty-handed because she couldn’t see spending the extra bucks when she knew there was a more affordable option out there. SAD, right?
Nope… there’s a twist!
About 15 minutes later lil’ sis decided she needed a hair cut and went back to BCBG to ask the sales consultant if she knew of any good salons. While waiting my Mom still had her eye on that dress and decided to ask the new manager on duty if there would be a way to have the dress shipped to her if it were to get marked down further. He did her one up… he said if she bought it right then and there he would give it to her for 50% off! She was sold, and for $249 she handed over the cash before he had a chance to change his mind.
Because the dress is sleeveless and Mom feels best with some sort of sleeve, we are looking into jacket/bolero options to go along with the dress. We are hoping to add a pop of color to coordinate with the BM dresses and to separate her dress from looking too bridal. Here are a few possibilities:
Style: 83968 from David’s Bridal
Or something like this ruffle cardigan (found here):
Or maybe a jacket like this one:
I am not one of those crazy brides who forbids my Mom from wearing an ivory shade and am pretty sure our guests won’t be confused in thinking she is the bride, but recent discussions on the Weddingbee boards have gotten me thinking we are making a huge faux pas.
Apparently her dress may look too bridal and our guests may be offended that my mother would even consider wearing it. The general consensus is that it should definitely be shortened (which we were thinking of doing anyway) and that it should be worn with some type of colored jacket. It’s funny that guests would be offended because I was there when she picked it out and had NO qualms whatsoever! I can understand the worry if my wedding gown were simple, but I don’t think she will come anywhere close to upstaging me as the bride because my wedding look is pretty rocking.
Remember?
What do you think? Is my mom wearing an ivory dress a wedding faux pas? Or should I just hold my head high and say, “screw tradition!”?
I don’t think brides who don’t want their mothers wearing white are necessarily crazy. 
I’m glad your relationship with your mother is different, but if mine wore ivory or white, I’d know *exactly* why… and I’d probably make the same assumption about your mom if I were a guest at your wedding and didn’t know better. It will probably have a few guests at your wedding feeling sorry for you. But if you don’t care, and she loves the dress, then that’s that!
I think the dress looks pretty bridal, but if you don’t care then I don’t think it’s a big deal.
You should do whatever you are comfortable with. Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks.
Like Mrs. Spaniel, if I were a guest at your wedding, I would probably make some judgments about your mom’s dress. But my wedding dress is close to your mom’s dress, so that’s influencing me. And with a colored bolero and colored shoes, I think it would be far enough away from the “bridal” category.
Overall, though, if you are happy, then go for it!
+1 miss chirpie
you like it? mom likes it? then who cares?
I am wearing the same dress as you! I am getting married in 17 days and can’t wait to wear it…it’s so pretty!
I agree with the comments above…do whatever you feel comfortable with. At least if it’s your mom you know is going to be wearing an ivory dress, you won’t be surprised on your wedding day when your cousin’s date wears a little white number.
I’m gonna go with the rest here. It looks *very* bridal (as in I would consider wearing that for my wedding dress if it had some straps), but its fine if you’re fine with it. However, don’t be shocked if you get some people telling you how bad they feel for you that your mother would dress like that and other background muttering.
If you don’t care then I doubt anyone else in your family would care. If it’s the kind of thing a family gossips about, then I guess the bride is more likely to engage but I don’t think it’s a big deal. She’s your mom and can wear whatever she wants. My mom wore ivory to my sisters wedding and no one gave it a second thought. Everyone was too busy dancing and having fun to gossip about something so silly.
I say if you both like it, that’s all that matters!
I ditto all the comments. I don’t think it’s a big deal and it is a fabulous dress. It is a bit bridal, but with shortening it and adding a colored jacket no one will mistake her for a bride. But I agree that the drama queens at your wedding might try to find something to talk about.
I’ve always had a hard time figuring out the whole “no one wears white except the bride” thing, so I think your mother should wear the dress! She loves it and you two obviously have a good relationship, so the only people who don’t know you very well will assume that she’s trying to upstage you (or whatever upsets people about guests in white).
Honestly, the first thought i had was that it looked like it could be a wedding dress.
however, its your day and if you’re cool with it, then who cares what anyone else thinks? on the other hand, there are always going to be people who assume or whisper things no matter what you’re wearing. people will always find something to comment on….so you cant really control that. as long as you and your groom are happy…then thats all that REALLY matters.
Maybe you could sprinkle some comments like “doesn’t my mom look great? We found that dress on sale while we were in Vegas. Can you believe it? I just love it,” that way people don’t get the wrong impression of your mom. And I’d make sure to tell MIL and some of the ILs too.
I agree that it probably does offer some white dress competition, but if you guys love it, that is all that matters! You may have to work on thickening your respective skins for a few comments here and there but that can be said about many wedding decisions, right? And you could always consider having it dyed in a slightly darker shade if you really start feeling worried.
It looks SUPER bridal and also, adorable. I kind of want it. I think that with a colored bolero and a shorter length it will look totally fine for your mom. How short will it be? And what color accents? I’m picturing turquoise, hehehehe.
I actually considered wearing that dress as my wedding gown! Although, it WAS much more “champagne” in person.
I’m wearing Maggie’s Vogue (not Royale, although it is gorgeous, too 
!!!! And my bridesmaids are wearing eggplant!! Your shoes are so adorable!! Purple is my fav color & always has been…
I agree that the MOB dress looks bridal, although I haven’t seen it in person. I think with a colored bolero, and maybe some fun matching accessories, would change it up a bit. What matters in the end is that you and your Mom are comfortable with the choice and happy
Here’s the thing: it’s YOUR wedding, and if you (and your fiance) don’t think it’s a faux pas, then it isn’t!
I wouldn’t judge and wouldn’t care. If that was the dress that she loves, go for it, short or long. I also am not in love with the different color bolero idea. I think an ivory one would be great.
Sorry for the repeat post, but is the dress as bright white as the picture seems to show? What about a large sash around the waist. That would look pretty.
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Mrs. Locket, Ithaca, NY Age and Occupation: 25, Research Technician Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, former Banker hoping to become an Officer of the Law Engagement Date: June 15, 2009 Wedding Date: September 2010 Venue: Heron Hill Winery About Me: I am a little bit of everything all rolled into one: A girly gal with rough edges---I love to get dolled up just as much as I enjoy throwing on some sneaks to toss a ball with Mr. Locket. My love for crafting and creating is quite apparent and I've been referred to as a Wonder Woman/Martha Stewart/Stepford Wife hybrid (yup, I'll take that as a compliment). I adore sewing, photography, sculpture, good eats (mmm tapas), baking, snugging and oh, pretty much everything in between (there's not much I dislike). I am super excited to be planning our vineyard wedding and couldn't be happier to be marrying Mr. Locket. We are a quirky, fun-loving couple residing in our college town with our two pups Maple and Molly. We love to go on hikes, visit our local dog park and to bask in the beauty of many of the local falls and gorges. We are an indecisive pair, but together we somehow manage to make up our minds (it's the easy stuff that's tricky).
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