Today It’s About HOPE

Today It’s About HOPE

August 16th, 2010 @ 11:43 am by Ms. Stripes
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Hey hive!

So by now you may have heard that on August 4th Federal Court Judge Vaughn Walker found the passage of Prop 8 here in California unconstitutional.

And on Thursday he denied a stay of his order while the case goes to the Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit. So all legal jargon aside, gay marriages will resume again in California on August 18th at 5PM, so long as the Ninth Circuit doesn’t issue its own “emergency” stay.

Yippee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe you’ve been expecting a celebratory post from me, and if not, well I definitely felt like I should be writing one.

But here’s the thing: I just don’t have the words yet. This is too big and too close to my heart and too close to our wedding and just too tenuous to celebrate quite yet.

Sure it’s a big step. Sure I believe that equality will prevail through the Ninth Circuit and the Supreme Court and even the public opinion, eventually.

But for us right now, and I’m sure for thousands of other gay couples in California, this is just too personal. We are living and breathing and working and loving in a state of waiting, of limbo, of uncertainty commingling with a shiver of hope.

And isn’t marriage about a little permanence? A little stability? Hoping against hope for the future? Hoping with someone else.

So here’s to hoping in California. We’re keeping our fingers, toes, eyes, arms & legs crossed. And if given the opportunity, we’ll be buzzing down to city hall to do it up legal style very soon.

And in the meantime, I can resume talking about dresses, flowers, invitations and all the other beautiful and very welcome distractions that I’d give up in a heartbeat to go down to the courthouse and marry F Stripes right now.

Lucky for you guys—we’ve got four more days to go! So let the distractions begin:

Today It’s About HOPE : wedding legal los angeles relationships Succulents succulents

Oh sorry- those are just some cute succulents in love. Stick around, though—I promise I have a few good posts in me this week. And maybe some invite madness—b/c did I mention those beauties are in the mail?!

*And we’d appreciate it ever so much if you’d send your good thoughts/energy/prayers for equal rights our direction in California this week!

Tags: legal, los-angeles, relationships |

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35 Responses to “Today It’s About HOPE”

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Bee

Mrs. Quiche (message) 3,160 posts, Sugar bee

Yeah!! I immediately thought of you and FI Stripes when I heard this since your wedding is so close to the date!!

8/16/10 @ 11:52 am (reply)

Member

JBelle7757 (message) 204 posts, Helper bee

I did such a happy dance when Prop 8 was overturned, and I can only hope that it’s a good sign of what’s to come for the rest of the country! Proud to be from MA and live in CT where basic human rights are available to all

Hooray!

8/16/10 @ 11:56 am (reply)

Bee

Mrs. Trail Mix (message) 6,328 posts, Bee Keeper

Wishing and hoping and praying that you guys are able to legally marry!!!!!! Go California!

8/16/10 @ 12:04 pm (reply)

Member

paw (message) 379 posts, Helper bee

My fingers and toes are crossed for you as well as all gay couples living in a state that does not allow them to marry (as my parents do). Such good news for you on prop 8!

8/16/10 @ 12:08 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Husky (message) 1,754 posts, Buzzing bee

Fingers = crossed!

8/16/10 @ 12:11 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Starfish (message) 1,924 posts, Buzzing bee

I thought of you too when I heard this! Hopefully California comes through!

8/16/10 @ 12:11 pm (reply)

Member

BrianneG (message) 938 posts, Busy bee

I’ve got my fingers crossed for you and all my other friends in the same boat. My manager/mentor managed to get married in the tiny window a couple years ago. But it makes me sick to think that might be all we have for two years. Eventually everyone will realize that inequality isn’t constitutional.

8/16/10 @ 12:21 pm (reply)

Member

bellelayne (message) 57 posts, Worker bee

YAY!!!!
Hope all goes well. My FI and I argued about the prop 8 thing. Not gay marriage but just the idea of overturning laws and dumb junk like that. He’s so freaking political. grrrr.

Anyway I hope all goes well for you guys.

8/16/10 @ 12:39 pm (reply)

Member

Violet Violet (message) 985 posts, Busy bee

Fingers crossed, and good thoughts for California!

8/16/10 @ 12:40 pm (reply)

10.

Member

cecullaton (message) 627 posts, Busy bee

Everyone of my toes, fingers, thumbs, legs and arms are crossed for you guys, and for all the couples in California that are being denied this RIGHT! YAY!!!

8/16/10 @ 12:43 pm (reply)

11.

Member

EAQ219 (message) 1,448 posts, Bumble bee

Sending happy thoughts and crossing every limb all the way from the East Coast

8/16/10 @ 12:47 pm (reply)

12.

Member

missmary (message) 16 posts, Newbee

Woohoo! All limbs & appendages crossed! My partner & I have an appointment at the County Recorder’s office for 10am Thursday & we won’t know until Wednesday at 5pm if we will get to keep that appointment. If I am ever able to find the words to describe the last week and the upcoming week, I’ll be sure to share

8/16/10 @ 12:47 pm (reply)

13.

Member

moniquennick2009 (message) 8 posts, Newbee

I am from California and voted to keep the definition of marriage. Please get your facts straight about California laws.

Proposition 8 doesn’t take away any rights or benefits of gay or lesbian domestic partnerships. Under California law, “domestic partners shall have the same rights, protections, and benefits” as married spouses. (Family Code § 297.5.) There are NO exceptions. Proposition 8 DID NOT change this.

Proposition 8 is simple and straightforward. It contains the same 14 words that were previously approved in 2000 by over 61% of California voters: “Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.”

It is sad to see that voting can be simply overturned by one person. What is the U.S coming to?

8/16/10 @ 12:58 pm (reply)

14.

Guest

SherryK

@moniquennick2009

Shove it and get YOUR facts straight.

8/16/10 @ 1:08 pm (reply)

15.

Member

besitos10210 (message) 76 posts, Worker bee

yeyeyey!!! when we heard the good news i looked @ mr. besitos and said, the could mean the stripey wedding will be legal & stuff, good timing!! we are so excited for you 2!!!

8/16/10 @ 1:10 pm (reply)

16.

Member

moniquennick2009 (message) 8 posts, Newbee

wow!! I can’t even speak here either. Talk about rights huh???

8/16/10 @ 1:12 pm (reply)

17.

Bee

Miss Stripes (message) 1,063 posts, Bumble bee

Thanks for keeping hope alive y’all!
@moniquennick2009: Prop 8 actually did take away the fundamental right to marry which all Californians enjoyed prior to it passing in November 2008. I want to marry my fiancée, not form a partnership. And as a member of a domestic partnership, I can tell you right now that it is absolutely not equal to marriage. Not in about 1000 legal/financial/tangible ways. I have my facts straight- this isn’t about politics or “issues”, for us this is about our daily lived reality. That is this affects our lives together in real ways every single day. And today I’m still rejoicing that hope is alive in California!

8/16/10 @ 1:16 pm (reply)

18.

Member

kaymaroo (message) 78 posts, Worker bee

@moniquennick2009:
Since when is it ok for voters to infringe on civil rights? This was not a vote to legalize marijuana or break ground on a new building or elect a politician. This was a vote to inhibit the rights of a very large section of the American population. This is exactly what our government was designed to do: protect the rights of all citizens, regardless of what is popular among the masses. I, for one, am proud to see that the California government is standing up to the voters and protecting a basic right to which all people are entitled, regardless of race, religion, gender, or sexual orientation.

8/16/10 @ 1:18 pm (reply)

19.

Member

Stumptown Lady (message) 119 posts, Blushing bee

@moniquennick2009: It’s a bit more complicated than just wording, so please before admonishing folks to “get facts straight, perhaps think a little bit further.

Separate is not equal, even if the CA previous law and marriage share the exact number of rights. Secondly, to have the state of CA recognize same sex marriage has huge implications at the federal level. Federal programs and rights like life insurance, wills & trusts kind of stuff, etc do NOT recognize civil unions, but rather only marriage. It’s far murkier when it comes to children/adoption/parents when the “union” is only recognized as a “civil union” once you cross state lines; marriage a step closer to helping alleviate that issue.

And for posterity’s sake, when someone is celebrating a victory that you do not think is a victory, perhaps its best to just leave the party (ie. not post on the discussion thread).

8/16/10 @ 1:19 pm (reply)

20.

Member

iRun2004 (message) 223 posts, Helper bee

@Stumptown Lady: Well Said!

And sending nothing but good thoughts, wishes, prayers and happiness your way Miss Stripes!

8/16/10 @ 1:29 pm (reply)

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