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Mrs. Pashmina, NYC/Catalina Island, CA Age and Occupation: 28, Arts Education Fiance's Age and Occupation: 34, IT Administrator Engagement Date: April 26th, 2009 Wedding Date: July 2010 Venue: Catalina Country Club, Catalina Island, California About Me: I'm a laid-back Cali girl who moved to NYC for school, and ended up staying for love. My fiance is a quick-witted Jersey boy, a self-proclaimed Foodie and the funniest man I've ever met. Together we love exploring the city streets embarking on our next misadventure---and yes, this often involves eating off food carts and trying "the next big thing". I'm the girl in the sundress, snapping photos and collecting trinkets of memorabilia along the way. As a girly girl at heart, I am excited about our romantic natural island wedding incorporating our American & Filipino traditions.
About Mrs. Pashmina

Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes

September 14th, 2010 @ 5:57 pm by Mrs. Pashmina

I had two requirements for my wedding gown: for it to make me feel beautiful and for it to cost $1500 or less. But I quickly realized that I didn’t want a typical gown. I liked the “bridal alternatives,” the “destination gowns,” and anything made from chiffon. They were ethereal and appealed to my Bohemian sensibility. So after seeing beautiful pictures for Saja gowns, I quickly made my appointment.

Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes :  wedding catalina island wedding dress 1 1

Image from 100 Layer Cake

But then this is when the happiness stops.

My best friend backed out on me the day before the appointment and I was feeling really sad that no one from my new family was interested in going to bridal dress appointments with me. I really wanted my own family to come with me since I thought one of these dresses was surely going to be the one. But they were 2,500 miles away on the opposite coast! So, I went into the appointment feeling very low. I didn’t even ask any of my other friends to come with me when my other friend backed out. I was just depressed, wishing I could share this experience with my mom and sister.

Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes :  wedding catalina island wedding dress 2 2

Then the abrupt clerk hit me where it hurt within 5 minutes into the appointment. “You really should bring someone when you come to these appointments. Why didn’t you bring anyone?” Never did I feel so hurt…I felt as if I had no one…no one was available, no one wanted to come, no one was as excited about me for this. My eyes were welling up as she led me into the dressing room and I told her, “No one could come.”

Then she pressed the point further.

“Well, try these on now. Then come back when you can bring someone. Really, no one could come? You need to get a friend’s opinion who knows your style. Who do you know who knows your style?” I took a deep breath and told her, “I know my style,” and pulled the curtain shut with a bit of a New York attitude.

And there were three that I really, really liked. They were effortlessly pretty.

Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes :  wedding catalina island wedding dress 3 3Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes :  wedding catalina island wedding dress 4 4

Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes :  wedding catalina island wedding dress 5 5

And if they made me feel pretty even while I was feeling so low then they certainly were possibilities. The wide-strap one made me feel long and lean, the strapless one had beautiful draping and had my favorite blush color, and the leaves on the other one seemed Grecian which I liked, (although it was two sizes too small and didn’t look great on). And all were under $800, so they could definitely could work for me.

When my fiance and his friend picked me up at the store after the appointment, they could read that I wasn’t feeling myself. Asking me, “You didn’t like any of them?” I replied, “I did. I just didn’t have fun.” I remember thinking that wedding planning was making me feel so lonely. But without giving it a second thought, and in the company of my some of my favorite people, I emailed my mom and sister pics of the dresses. And then I did nothing related to weddings with the two boys and had the best time!

Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes :  wedding catalina island wedding dress 6 6

Did your moods ever get the better of you during one of your bridal appointments? Did you ever go at it alone, wishing you were with an entourage?

Tags: catalina-island, wedding-dress |
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44 Responses to “Saja Gowns with Watery Eyes”

1 2 3 

1.
Tralala
Member
Tralala (message)  113 posts, Blushing bee

Yes! Yes! Yes! I was so stressed out about trying on dresses for the exact same reasons. My best friend and maid of honor lives in San Diego, as does my mom, while I’m in Boston. For my second appointment, I had some friends with me, but I was utterly disheartened by what I was finding in the bridal salons. I ended up telling my fiancé about my frustration and ordering my dress online. It’s “supposed” to be the most fun part, and I was looking forward to it, but not a single store in the Greater Boston area had the type of dress I wanted to try on, and I didn’t want to stress about it anymore.

 
2.
Guest Icon
Guest
carshlyn

Oh noo! Don’t feel bad, my family is across the country too. And I got tired of begging my fiances mom, sister, friends to go too. My mom’s flying over in a couple weeks to dig into it but I’ve been shopping alone too.. and over and over they tell you you should have brought someone! How insensitive can one person be!?
Hang in there, my wedding planning hasn’t been all roses either with no family wanting to take part. Sigh.

 
3.
gill84
Member
gill84 (message)  725 posts, Busy bee

I also live away from my mom and sis and felt down sometimes at the bridal salon - you are not alone! and good for sticking it to her with the attitude

 
4.
Mary Poppins
Member
Mary Poppins (message)  107 posts, Blushing bee

Aw that sounds so sad. I’m planning on going on my own to narrow things down, then I’ll bring someone with me for the “final director’s cut”. Not my Mom, because she passed away 4 years ago, and certainly not my sister/MOH, because she has a mohawk and I can only imagine her saying “yuck. I mean, it looks good on you, but it’s not really my thing-ya know?”

 
5.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Socks (message)  1,323 posts, Bumble bee

I was in the same boat as you–I went to an appointment alone, and the consultants (all three of them) never paid a lick of attention to me, but were all fawning over the girl who brought her mom and all of her bridesmaids. It was lonely and sad, and I ended up leaving the shop without trying anything on.

I do think those dresses are gorgeous though–they look fantastic on you! The second one looks very much like my civil ceremony dress!

 
6.
sylk
Member
sylk (message)  59 posts, Worker bee

I can’t believe your clerk. Seriously!

I live out on the West Coast while the rest of my family is on the East Coast, including most of my friends. My first two appointments were completely by myself. It wasn’t until I went home for Christmas that I got to go out with my mom and sisters - something my mom wanted to do even if I’d already found the dress. Turned out I hadn’t, and we ended up finding it that session, so it worked out.

If you and your guy don’t care too much, you could always bring him along. I know it’s really important to some people to have it as the surprise but it wasn’t to us, so my FI was along on the appointment with my mom and my sisters. The ladies at the shop weren’t quite sure what to do with him, but it was totally worth it from my point of view because I know he loves the dress! (This also made it a little easier to justify when it was near the top of my budget range.)

 
7.
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Member
canuckthief (message)  41 posts, Newbee

that is so hard, but in other news, you looked absolutely gorgeous in all three gowns! i wonder if you chose one of them…. i love saja gowns, and have wonderred what they look like. beeyootiful!

 
8.
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Member
MUI831 (message)  728 posts, Busy bee

I really dig the first one!!!

 
9.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Turtle (message)  782 posts, Busy bee

Sooo sad. :( I seriously can’t believe the store clerk! What a jerk. Obviously no bride wants to be reminded that she’s looking for a wedding dress by herself. I can’t wait for a happy ending to this story, hopefully one that includes some girl friends and family!

 
10.
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Member
marieta (message)  339 posts, Helper bee

That clerk was incredibly rude and insensitive. You DON’T be rude to your customer! Sheesh! It’s just common sense, especially right at the beginning of an appointment when you have no grasp on the person you’re helping. Egads.

As for me, well, I was in a similar situation as you — friends and family on the opposite coast — but I didn’t have a problem going by myself. I preferred it, actually. I only asked my FSIL to come with me when I already found my dress but wanted confirmation that it worked as well on me as I thought it did. She picked it out as the best one in a blind test, so yay!

 
11.
bmore
Member
bmore (message)  360 posts, Helper bee

I also went to almost all my dress appointments by myself. I didn’t bring a friend until I had narrowed it down to two dresses and was ready to buy. It’s really way more efficient to go by yourself - you don’t have to leave the dressing room in anything you don’t love and spend time debating a dress you just don’t feel. Remember, it only matters what you think, so the only person you need is you!

 
12.
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Member
jules (message)  158 posts, Blushing bee

WHAT?! I went to at least a dozen appointments by myself and no one ever said anything like that to me. When I did eventually find my gown, I had my favorite aunt with me, but it was actually a last second decision to try on one more dress before the store closed. It wouldn’t have mattered whether she was there or not! She only came because she lived by the bridal salon.

Personally, I can be influenced by friends and family too much by opinion (how many tops and shoes have I bought that I never ended up wearing…!) that I KNEW it was better to be alone. I knew I had to be the one to decide. I didn’t even let my mother see it until the wedding day because I knew she’d throw her opinion at me.

Trust me, it only matters what YOU think and what you wanted to see in the reflection. :)

 
13.
Miss Sweet Tea
Member
Miss Sweet Tea (message)  289 posts, Helper bee

Love the strapless on you!!!!!

 
14.
jordynrose
Member
jordynrose (message)  6,351 posts, Bee Keeper

I love Saja gowns! I am so sorry the clerk was being so rude prying. :(

 
15.
sboston06
Member
sboston06 (message)  797 posts, Busy bee

For some reason the bridal shop lady makes me think of the scene in Pretty Woman. I’m sorry she made you feel so low especially when you should’ve been THRILLED to find 3 such beautiful dresses.

Can’t wait to read your next installment. I hope future dress shopping trips were nicer.

 
16.
Guest Icon
Guest
elle

aw pashmina! that must have felt rubbish! But you were braver than me; well done for ‘tude.

Also, just on a sidenote- the beautiful chiffon flowiness is kind of very similar to the monsoon bridal gowns (try monsoon.co.uk) which retail at about £200 and now ship to the US! Just a tip for any other brides…

 
17.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Trail Mix (message)  6,329 posts, Bee Keeper

Wow, I reeeeeeeally wish I’d discovered these gowns about 1.5 years ago, they’re gorgeous!

 
18.
Mrs. Hot Wings
Bee
Mrs. Hot Wings (message)  2,213 posts, Buzzing bee

Awwww babe. I’m so sorry. I pretty much hated shopping for wedding dresses with my family in San Diego, me in Chicago, and BMs spread all over the place. I felt so bad asking people to come with me. It wasn’t a fun experience. I looked more online than I did in stores for that reason. I enjoyed our lovely NYC outing trying on dresses ;)

 
19.
cr6zy
Member
cr6zy (message)  1,187 posts, Bumble bee

i took one friend with me. my mom live far away too. i wasnt going to find “the dress” i was just trying to figure out what size i am and the styles i liked best. i ended up with a craigslist dress but its great for me. hope you week gets better!

 
20.
Guest Icon
Guest
sambycat

the store person was obnoxious and i am really sorry you were sad.

that said, i don’t get the mythology around all the “say yes to the dress” crap. have you never picked out something awesome on your own?! of course you have! and i understand that all this stuff is important and it is fun to have people with you and what not, but to let that totally rock your world?? no way!!!! those dresses all are really cute! the only thing i would wonder about is giving money to a shop with such an ashole sales person. although i went to david’s bridal twice and bought a dress there, by myself, and the service there was ridiculous. would it be nice to have some kind of TV, idyllic, princess and the pea bridal shopping experience? absolutely!! but just as likely, you could have stood there with your special loved ones, family even, and they would hate what you love etc…

im sorry it was a bad afternoon for you, but it sounds like you bucked up! plus isn’t it better to try on a few things here and there before you make a decision?

 
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Mrs. Pashmina
Mrs. Pashmina

Mrs. Pashmina, NYC/Catalina Island, CA Age and Occupation: 28, Arts Education Fiance's Age and Occupation: 34, IT Administrator Engagement Date: April 26th, 2009 Wedding Date: July 2010 Venue: Catalina Country Club, Catalina Island, California About Me: I'm a laid-back Cali girl who moved to NYC for school, and ended up staying for love. My fiance is a quick-witted Jersey boy, a self-proclaimed Foodie and the funniest man I've ever met. Together we love exploring the city streets embarking on our next misadventure---and yes, this often involves eating off food carts and trying "the next big thing". I'm the girl in the sundress, snapping photos and collecting trinkets of memorabilia along the way. As a girly girl at heart, I am excited about our romantic natural island wedding incorporating our American & Filipino traditions.

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