A Daddy’s Girl Without a Dad

A Daddy’s Girl Without a Dad

September 20th, 2010 @ 5:43 pm by Mrs. Meerkat
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Growing up, I was always Daddy’s girl. From the day I was born, I was basically glued to his side. He was not only my dad, he was also one of my best friends. He understood my geek ways like nobody else ’cause he was just like me.

Me and My Dad

So the day I called to tell Mama Meerkat that Mr. Meerkat had proposed, the call quickly went from elation to sadness when Mama Meerkat realized she would have to be the one to walk me down the aisle. You see, my dad passed away from cancer just a few months after Mr. Meerkat and I started dating.

Since that day, I have been on a mission to find a good way to pay tribute to the best dad a girl could ask for. During my research—I don’t even remember where now—someone posted this poem by Kelly McLean:

Dear Lord please clear a spot for him

he should have the perfect view.

His little girl’s a Bride today,

and I am counting on you.

Let me feel his presence;

as I journey down the aisle.

But let me notice his absence;

if only for a while.

Let me stop to think of him;

As I am given away.

And know that if he could;

he would be here with me today.

Dear Lord please clear a spot for him;

he should have the perfect view.

And if he should get sad today;

Dear Lord I count on you.

While I love this poem, I am at odds as to what to do with it. I know for sure I don’t want it read out loud ’cause I would bawl like a baby. I thought about putting it in the program, but then everyone else would be bawling like a baby. (It has been four years, and everyone still misses Father Meerkat terribly.) So what is a daddy’s girl to do?

In the end, we probably won’t even use this poem. I will keep it as something special just for me. Instead, we will have a picture of Father Meerkat along with his favorite flower on a memorial table at the ceremony, and I will add a photo charm of him on my bouquet.

Texas Girl Designs - Etsy

Then for the reception, we will put out his photo with a sign like the picture below, asking people to take something (probably one of his favorite candies) in honor of Father Meerkat.

Anne Ruthmann Photography

Are any of you doing something special to honor a family member who has passed away? How are you keeping it from being sad?

Tags: family, riviera-maya, traditions |

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57 Responses to “A Daddy’s Girl Without a Dad”

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Member

smith2be (message) 399 posts, Helper bee

I’m very sorry for your loss. That’s a beautiful poem, it made me more than tear up. We are doing something similar for my oldest brother who passed away. For sure a picture, but still thinking of something else.

9/20/10 @ 5:48 pm (reply)

Member

Moffy (message) 200 posts, Helper bee

Beautiful post! My mom died 18 years ago, and then all 4 of my grandparents have passed away since then. So I listed them all on our program under remembrances. But for something special for my mom, I made a bouquet charm, similar to what you showed on your post, of a picture of her on her wedding day, so that she was with my dad and me when I walked down the aisle.

Big hugs to you as you grapple with the sad aspects of wedding planning. I’m sure your dad is elated for you and Mr. Meerkat!

9/20/10 @ 5:50 pm (reply)

Member

SandraMarie_1986 (message) 1,363 posts, Bumble bee

I’m so sorry to hear about your dad! I love the idea of the memorial table and the candy idea. I think it would be a wonderful dedication to his memory. I also love the idea of the picture charm on the bouquet. Maybe you could carry a copy of the poem in your purse or put a copy in the guestbook or your photo book to look back on. Beautiful post and beautiful ideas.

9/20/10 @ 5:56 pm (reply)

Member

whittlebitt (message) 64 posts, Worker bee

oh my goodness.. that poem is beautiful. You should read that at your ceremony. Then everyone can bawl together.. I am so sorry about your loss. I hope your day is everything you hope for I’m sure your dad will be watching proudly

9/20/10 @ 5:57 pm (reply)

Member

mareundarum (message) 83 posts, Worker bee

How about transferring the poem to a handkerchief (either screen print, or embroidery, depending on cost), and using that to wrap your bouquet with?

9/20/10 @ 5:59 pm (reply)

Bee

Mrs. Cola (message) 2,870 posts, Sugar bee

That poem is so sweet, and I’m very sorry for your loss. I thing it is so wonderful that you will play a tribute to your father on your wedding day with a memorial table! For me, I wanted to honor both of my grandmothers and great aunt who are gone, so I had my something old/borrowed items be something that had once belonged to them.

9/20/10 @ 6:00 pm (reply)

Member

tea (message) 7,295 posts, Bee Keeper

i just lost my dad this year and that poem just about made me cry. definitely love the sentiment but i’m like you, probably couldn’t use that either. i’m hoping to get married on his birthday as a way of including him on day. it works out since his birthday will be a saturday next year and a sunday the following year so that gives the mister and i time to get engaged.

9/20/10 @ 6:04 pm (reply)

Member

katherine26 (message) 98 posts, Worker bee

I love the poem it so beautiful. My sister and I lost our Aunt right before her wedding. We had a charm bracelet wrapped in her bouqet, but also had the poem wound in the ribbon. It made it that much more special. I love the memorial table it is very beautiful. I am sorry to hear of your loss.

9/20/10 @ 6:12 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Elephant (message) 6,182 posts, Bee Keeper

I am so sorry for your loss Meerkat. That is a beautiful poem and I really like the idea of photo of him on your bouquet. My something old will be from my grandmother, and we will be putting a page in the program for all 6 of our grandparents that have passed away.

9/20/10 @ 6:14 pm (reply)

10.

Bee

Mrs. Trail Mix (message) 6,329 posts, Bee Keeper

I’m so sorry to hear of your dad, Meerkat, and I think you have some really nice ways of honoring his memory at your wedding!

9/20/10 @ 6:24 pm (reply)

11.

Member

photographernico (message) 527 posts, Busy bee

I’m about to bawl over here. Beautiful poem. Could you use it in your program? I like the favorite flower idea (it’s something we’re considering) and like the photo with favor even more.

9/20/10 @ 6:25 pm (reply)

12.

Member

Miss Mannequin (message) 12 posts, Newbee

I love the poem. I’ve also been trying to figure out a way to commemorate my dad, being a daddy’s girl to the core like yourself. My Mom and Dad split up when I was 5 and he took care of me all by himself so we definitely had a special bond.

A dear friend of mine (and second daughter to my dad) sang “what a wonderful world” at his memorial service. It was a favorite of his as well as his fathers so we decided that my two sisters will walk me down the aisle to it since he can’t.

I still feel like I need to figure out a few other ways to honor him. I may borrow the idea for the memorial table–that’s a great one. Good luck on your planning:)

9/20/10 @ 6:31 pm (reply)

13.

Bee

Mrs. Oyster (message) 879 posts, Busy bee

Wow, what a poem. I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s great that you are so thoughtful about it.

We did a few small things to remember my dad (and other family members). One of them was the bouquet/locket thing and another was having his picture displayed on the “family portrait” table, which was also subtle.

While planning, it seemed very understated… but I didn’t even realize how much I would feel the loss until that day. I like the cigar/candy idea — it recognizes your dad’s presence in an upbeat way.

9/20/10 @ 6:39 pm (reply)

14.

Bee

Miss Hippo (message) 1,009 posts, Bumble bee

I’m sorry for your loss, Meerkat. I think that poem would be lovely in the program. I also like that memorial table idea, Meerkat.

9/20/10 @ 6:47 pm (reply)

15.

Member

MrsSl82be (message) 8,095 posts, Bee Keeper

So sorry to hear about your dad, I am also a daddy’s girl so I can only imagine the pain of losing your father. My grandmother died and year and ahalf before we got married, so we left an empty seat for her at the ceremony right where she would have sat next to my mom, and put a red rose on it (her favorite flower). My sister and I had baby red roses in our bouquets, and we also had a candle lit for her at the alter. And all the women in my family wore red to symbolize my grandmother since it was her favorite color. My brother was our officiant, so he also said something about her and we had a moment of silence for her

9/20/10 @ 6:50 pm (reply)

16.

Bee

Miss Earrings (message) 2,481 posts, Buzzing bee

The poem made me well up. Im sorry about your dad meerkat…I think your ideas for honoring his memory are wonderful.

9/20/10 @ 7:14 pm (reply)

17.

Guest

Tiffany

I lost my father when I was 16, my twin and I had found him on Christmas day, not breathing. My mom had just left and we were completely devastated. To remember him I am getting picture charms to hang from my bouquet, my moms corsage, my two sisters bouquets and my aunts (who is in the bridal party) bouquet. My mother and her brother (who really helped us get by) will be walking me down the aisle. I am also going to the church in my father antique 67 Chevy Malibu. I also wanted to find a song that made me think of my father when I did what was supposed to be the father daughter dance. I didn’t want to pretend I was dancing it with him. I chose Faith Hill “There You’ll Be”. I will be dancing with my uncle and my godfather (my fathers best friend). I hope this helps. I know hard this is. I cry at least once a week thinking about how he won’t be there.

9/20/10 @ 7:15 pm (reply)

18.

Bee

Miss Meerkat (message) 3,216 posts, Sugar bee

Thank you all so much! I came home from work to find all your comments. You guys are the best!

@mareundarum: I love the idea of printing the poem on a handkerchief!

9/20/10 @ 8:10 pm (reply)

19.

Member

jordynrose (message) 6,351 posts, Bee Keeper

Meerkat, sorry to hear about the loss of your father. That picture of the two of you is absolutely precious! Anyway you choose to honor him will be incredible and special.

9/20/10 @ 8:13 pm (reply)

20.

Bee

Miss Meerkat (message) 3,216 posts, Sugar bee

@tea: That is such a great idea to share your anniversary with your dad’s birthday. I know he would be so happy for you.

@Mrs. Oyster: *hugs* I am glad to know that even if it feels understated now it will mean a lot on the day of our wedding.

9/20/10 @ 8:14 pm (reply)

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