“A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.” – Willy Wonka
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Ahh, my first rant post.
When I first got accepted as a bee, I wondered if I’d feel the urge to write a post about the not-so-fun parts of planning a wedding. See, I’m a “glass is half full” kind of gal and usually try and shoo those worries and frustrations out the door before they can sour my mood.
But now, as the 6 month mark looms ahead and all the vendors, contracts, knick knacks start to come to life, I can’t help but feel a little dizzy. Where has the time gone?! It seems like just yesterday we were getting engaged. But here we are, 190-ish days away…and glancing at our to do list, there is so much left to do! And there is so much to discuss with Mr. O, because I want him to be part of the planning, too. And then I start to act zany…like Cathy:
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Oof!
And to top it all off, lately, I’ve been having the most vivid dreams of Mr. Ostrich and me getting married…in city hall, with 10 of our closest family and friends and Nap, like Big & Carrie. Pure and simple. And you know what? We are ridiculously happy and it feels absolutely perfect. No marvelous decorations. No dream gown. No paradise backdrop. Just me, my soul mate and a whole lotta love. 
So you can imagine, these recurring dreams have a tiny part of me wishing we skipped the whole destination wedding thing and kept things plain and simple. But everything is locked and loaded and there’s no turning back now.
Or maybe this is some weird sign for me to stop obsessing about every itty bitty charming detail. And to remember that no one will remember how beautiful the calligraphy was on our escort cards, but they will remember how blissful—and stress free!—Mr. Ostrich and I are when we say, “I Do.”
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Either way, I’m hoping that this feeling will go away. Any suggestions?
Thanks for listening, bees. It means more than you know.
I’m six weeks away from my destination wedding, and sometimes I wonder WHAT I was thinking in taking it on! There are so many more logistics and details to handle, and everything has to be transported, and dealing with vendors via email and phone isn’t the same as face-to-face, blah, blah, blah.
But as much as I am allowing myself to obsess about the details, in the end, I’m determined not to sweat the small stuff and to remind myself often that most of it IS small stuff.
Today, my friend, who has been a sounding board through all of my planning and obsessing, said to me, “Your wedding is going to be PERFECT.” I said, “Well, I’m not expecting it to be perfect — they say something ALWAYS goes wrong.” And she said, “That doesn’t mean it’s not going to be PERFECT!”
I think I’m going to replay that in my head over and over again as the day approaches. That, and a kick-ass spreadsheet to capture every detail, should get me through!
Oh, and one last piece of advice – WORK AHEAD on everything you possibly can. At this point, I have my to-do list mapped out week to week, and even day to day, and my goal is to have only a few last-minute tasks in the last 7-10 days so I can rest up and be ready for the big day.:)
Good luck, and have fun!
Sorry to hear that you’re stressing, I can totally relate. It was really stressful leading up to our destination wedding. That being said, once we got there, it was WONDERFUL- totally fun to have everyone in one place, no distractions from other events happening, and it all came together magically. You will look back and it will all be worth it. Good luck!!!
First I want to say that cartoon is so funny and true! I couldn’t stop laughing. Well I am 35 days away from my destination wedding and a few months ago I felt the same way you did. Why did I ever think a destination wedding was a good idea? This is when I decided to make a master to do list on Google Docs (love this) and from there I separated everything out into a weekly to-do list. This really helps! So every Monday I log on, take a look at what I have ahead of me for the week and I don’t feel as stressed. Best of luck with all the planning and do your best to just enjoy the process.. we are only engaged once!
Sounds to me like your subconscious is just reminding you about what is most important – that you’re marrying the man you love and sharing it with the people who are the most important to you. All the other little details are not nearly as important as that! My advice would be to breathe, do whatever you can manage, and if something on your list doesn’t get crossed off, just release it – it’s not the most important thing 
Oh how that precious time flies!!! You have it right, O– try to look past the little things. If your guests leave with the feeling of love between u and Mr. O, you’ve had the best wedding!!!
Oh yes! I often fantasize about my “other” no-stress weddings. No worries Miss O- it’s good that you worry now because you have plenty of time to accomplish what you need. Worry now, breeze later. Here’s to hoping!
i keep getting the “its your wedding, your the bride, do what you want” and i calmly walk away every time but deep down inside im screaming “IF I DIDNT WANT YOU OPINION I WOULDNT ASK!! BUT IM ASKING SO GIVE ME YOU &#@%@*&@* OPINION!! IM BRAINSTORMING!!!” but i finally told FI if he ever said that to me again i would be a total bridezilla the rest of the planning. even the bridesmaids are like we will wear what ever you want! so i took them to davids biridal found the ugliest dress and told them we were ordering it. when they started freaking out i told them to shut up and find dresses THEY like. im not the one wearing them they are. same with everything else, i am worring about all the details and expect all the adults to be big boys and girls, pull up their undies and fend for themselves lol
I remember having those same feelings! But honestly, our wedding day was filled with so much joy, and looking back I wouldn’t change a single thing! All of the planning I worked so hard on, even what felt like totally insignificant details… it all felt SO worth it in the end! Keep trekking along, Miss O! In ways, a little city hall wedding would be very nice, but you have so many wonderful things planned already. Just keep trying your best to make your wedding as “you” as possible! If you stay true to yourself, your destination wedding is going to be the most beautiful, best day of your life! (So far at least… 
)
I’m one week away (holy smokes) and I have learned to give up on some details, but keep the ones most important to us. Honestly everything is done, but even the stress of a huge, looming, incredibly important event is enough to have me acting like an emotional wreck. I just keep telling myself, no matter what happens, everything will be just as it should be because Chris and I will be married.
I feel the same way sometimes, but I have to imagine that ANY wedding is going to be stressful at some point! No matter how you do it (courthouse or Hawaii), it’s still a big deal and you’d want it to be perfect. Hang in there, Ostrich!
Story of my life, Miss O. Well, minus the dreams. We’re getting close to the 6 month mark and I’m seriously freaking out.
I mean, its all fun and stuff, but this wedding buisness is sooo much work!
I am planning a destination wedding as well and I do get frustrated not being able to have the face to face with all the vendors. Believe it or not I have not even tried the food or the wine where we are getting married. I have the feeling that I will forget to do something for the wedding and that it will be a noticiable something. I try to remind myself that in the end it is all about my FI and I and nothing else will matter. Keep You head up and take one step at a time.
I hear you! the details are gorgeous… but can drive you crazy! I think maybe if you just focus on what is most important…the rest will fall into place
Please stop worrying about the small details. I worried about them until the Tuesday before our wedding when I cried to my husband. When the actual day came around, so many things happened which weren’t supposed to, but over two months later, I still have people telling me how much they loved our wedding. They seem to have forgotten that the officiant was 45 minutes late and everyone was hot and hungry when she finally arrived. All they remember is how happy we were and how good the food and cake were. Funny, because all I remember is seeing my husband for the first time.
@NotYourTypicalBride: @Huckleberry: @Dominican Bride: @SadieBee: @Mrs. Barrettes: @Miss Zebra: @cr6zy: @Mrs. Turtle: @MsBunting: @photographernico: @Miss Panther: @Miss Giraffe: @iluvadams: @MissCatherine: @TheFutureMcBride: my marvelous fellow bees….all of your words of wisdom, support, and friendship are the reason why i adore weddingbee so much! thank you for lifting my head out of the sand…and making me see my silver lining. love, love, love you all to pieces. xo
Awww… that’s so sweet. I’m sure I speak for all the girls when I say, “Glad we could help!”
And hey, if you want a copy of my spreadsheet, message me.
[...] With planning in full gear and the wedding less than 6 months away, it’s pretty easy to glance at those checklists and calendars and contracts and craft supplies, get frazzled and have those moments. [...]
Mrs. Ostrich, San Francisco/Hawaii Age and Occupation: 30, Fashion Buyer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 38, Copywriter Engagement Date: October 4, 2009 Wedding Date: April 2011 Venue: Sweet ceremony by the sea and sunset celebration on the North Shore of Hawaii About Me: Born in the city of angels and residing in the city by the bay, I’m a fearless fashion buyer by day, a passionate blog author by night and a dreamy bride-to-be in between. I thank my lucky stars to live in such a stunning city that gives me gifts like organic honey lavender ice cream, movie nights in the park, tucked away beaches, legendary record stores, '80s dance parties, awesome sports teams, stellar flea markets, and vintage bookshops. Oh, and I love to dance! We always find every excuse to escape to the beach, and decided a little seaside wedding in Hawaii is our idea of bliss. Full of our favorite people, music, food and sparkly lights, this is one sunset celebration we will always remember.
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