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I definitely like to be on top of things, but I think some of those wedding planning timelines are a wee bit overzealous. Take for example a DJ. According to many wedding timelines, we should have booked a DJ 6-9 months out. I even found some that said booking a DJ needed to happen 9-12 months out. Seriously?!?? This, my friends, had me very worried. Being a LDB (long distance bride), it’s not always possible to plan things exactly as the timeline says. I mentioned here that I had met with two DJs nine months out, but I didn’t really jive with either one of them, which meant the DJ decision had to be put off until my next trip to Dallas… at about the 5 1/2 month mark. Ugh. I was convinced that all the best and most affordable DJs would all be taken, as every bride is following the exact same timelines, right? Would this be the only choice left for me?!??
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Oh, not so, mo fo!
During last week’s Dallas Planapalooza, King Hippo and I met with two more DJs and were able to quickly agree on our favorite one. We booked him right away and crossed yet another task off the to do list. Woo hoo!!!
So, fear not LDBs. Just ’cause you can’t follow the planning timeline exactly, doesn’t necessarily mean that you will be screwed by the vendor options. Unless you live in a tiny town, there are TONS of wedding vendors to choose from. Yes, planning ahead is always good, but when you’re planning long distance, it’s just not as easy. Take that, wedding timeline!
Any other LDBs struggling with sticking to the standard wedding checklist? What tasks are you doing later than the schedule recommends?
I’m an LDB and didn’t meet with my DJ before I booked him (is that crazy?). I did, however, watch videos of him djing and listen to his mixes, which was good enough for me. I have quickly realized that as an LDB, I can’t meet every vendor and do everything according to checklists. They key seems to be prioritize, prioritize, prioritize.
Thank you for this post. I am long distance too and freaking out because of the timeline. Trips won’t be super frequent (so expensive to travel from one side of the country to another) and we are so nervous.
Posts like this make me really feel better and feel like everything will work out. It also makes me feel better because you’re in a big market like I am.
I am an LDB and I think I’m the opposite - I’m paranoid that there will be a limited number of “good” vendors in my area (it’s up in non-coastal Maine) and since I’m getting married on a popular weekend (Labor Day), I’ve already reserved all my vendors. I actually had the florist I wanted taken from me (someone booked her on the spot) and we were well over 12 months out! But there are a lot challenges and I too have not yet met our DJ, but we’ve had some long conversations and I feel comfortable that he’ll do a good job for us. We have already made 2 trips to meet with our vendors and have at least one more trip to make so we can sit with everone in person one more time. It’s a lot more work than I thought it would be!
Yep, we are on the same page Ms. Hippo. I haven’t met some of my vendors. I haven’t even booked them. Will be doing some booking next month for a Spring wedding. I don’t even have my date nailed down but I have some ideas. I used to freak out about the timelines but the only thing I didn’t get was my first choice photographer but he was booked more than 15months in advance so…. anyhow, your post made me feel a lot better!
Heck, the timeline was shot from the beginning for me… we had only an 8 month engagement! We booked the caterer 5 months out, the DJ and the photographer both a little more than 3 months out…. and the florist? Finally got on that one with about 3.5 weeks to go. They said, oh, great! July! …. 2010?!?!?…
heh. it all worked out fine. (and I wasn’t long distance planning… just, er, taking my time. 
)
i think a lot of it depends on time of year for the wedding and wedding location. i live in an area where winter weddings aren’t that popular so even though i’ve been following a timeline overall, it’s not been stressful if a date has past. i mostly try to stick to one because i tend to wait until the last minute to do things. it’s a bad habit.
We didn’t send out STDs until 4 mos ahead, as opposed to the usual 6.
Unless your guests need a passport, I can’t imagine buying plane tickets 6 months in advance.
With a 7.5 month engagement I could find no timelines that applied to me! By the time we booked our venue, we had 6 months to go, and it all turned out great - all the vendors we were interested in were available. We booked our band 3 or 4 months out, the florist about 1 month out and our delicious cake with 2 or 3 weeks to spare.
Full disclosure - It probably worked in our favor that we got married on a Friday (all the Saturdays at the venues we loved were taken!).
@mak418: I had an eight month engagement too! So yeah, no timelines for me! Basically I just followed my gut on how soon or late I needed to make arrangements. It kind of frustrates me that you only have a year-long engagement timeline to choose from. How cool would it be to have an interactive one, where you plugged in your engagement/wedding date and it calculated a new timeline especially for you? Hmmm…sounds like I need to invent it! 
I was surprised that the music ended up being by far the most stressful vendor to secure. Our date is popular (September) in coastal Maine, and all the standard area DJs were booked as of late September (a year out.) I had to “go rogue” and find someone a little under the radar who is perfect for us - beyond the typical recommended vendor lists on places like weddingwire, etc. It wasn’t easy, and he is already booking dates for next fall as well. I feel relieved that we didn’t wait until the spring…
Thank you for this post! I am also a LDB, and with an eight month engagement! I have been stressing about timelines, so it’s good to know that I’m not alone, and that it can all work out!
I applaud you Miss Hippo. I am an LBD bride, live in Dallas, getting married in MN. I definitely think it makes it difficult to stick to the timeline. We went back in August with way too short of a list of venues to check out, but we were like, if we dont find one on THIS trip, we wont be back until December. Thankfully we did, but it is hard not being able to meet with caterers/photographers, etc. On the other hand i like to think just think how much more time id be spending on all this stuff if i could swing by our venue all the time or actually be able to meet with all of those caterers/photogs? I think i would go crazy and i know FI would because its already to much for him sometimes. im just trying to get as much done as possible as far out as possible to avoid stress closer to the big day.
YES! Also a LDB and I’m a little nervous - we booked our venue, but can’t go back until after Christmas, when I am going to try and meet with all other vendors, or at least the big ones (florist, DJ, photog) but I am concerned they will be booked for our date (Oct. 1, 2011). It seems like so far in advance but the 9-12 month timeline had me worried - thanks so much for this post!
That DJ *loves* me! I should probably invest in a zebra jacket- so chic! I laughed out loud at the “oh not so, mo fo.” I’m totally hijacking that!
@Mrs. Sand Dollar: Genius! Love the thought of a ‘customizable length’ to-do list.
We never quite met the timeline dates. We were either WAY ahead of schedule or running a bit late, but that is because it all had to be planned around my trips into town.
Hello Miss Hippo!!! I am also a Dallas bride, and I am completely LOST when it comes to finding a DJ. Do you have any suggestions or recommendations? Who did you finally decide to use? I just have no idea where to start, and any help would be much appreciated! :)
@Bubbles: PM me here: http://boards.weddingbee.com/message.php?user=86945 and I can give the details! I interviewed 4 different DJs before I found the one I’m using.
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Mrs. Hippo, New York City/Dallas, TX Age and Occupation: 34, Event Planner for a Non-Profit Fiance's Age and Occupation: 35, Finance IT Engagement Date: August 8, 2009 Wedding Date: March 2011 Venue: Samuel Lynne Galleries and Marc Events About Me: I’m a thirty-something bride living in New York City and planning a modern-ish wedding in Dallas, Texas. I love trashy reality television (Jersey Shore, anyone?), online shopping, Sunday brunch, Central Park, and random celebrity spottings on the streets of Manhattan. While I love NYC, I miss good Tex-Mex, my college friends, central A/C, and being in close proximity to a Target. I’m thrilled to finally be planning an event that’s not work-related and to be marrying my best friend in what I hope will be a unique and personal ceremony followed by a reception with plenty of good food, good drinks, and dancing (regardless if it’s good or not).
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