Weddingbee Blog

Everyone is getting married! Or at least it seems that way, doesn’t it? It’s just that time in our lives, I suppose!

I think there are certain things about weddings you just simply cannot understand until you’ve planned one yourself, and now that I’m on the other side of things, I think it’s made me a better wedding guest!

Here are just a few of the ways my behavior has changed since being a bride.

At the Bridal Shower

• Use Snail Mail: If I’m going to a shower where the bride will be coming in from out of town, I send the gift to her home ahead of time. I know, I know, but then she doesn’t get to open anything at the shower! My remedy? I either print a picture of the gift and slip it into her card or purchase another, smaller gift that she can open on that day. For example, my aunt got us most of our towels, which she had sent to our apartment. When I opened her gift at the shower, she had reserved one washcloth for me to open.

Respondez s’il vous plait!

• Send it ASAP: If you’ve already started getting back your RSVPs, then you know that how AWESOME it is—seriously the best feeling in the world, right? Now when we get an invitation to a wedding, I make sure to do one of two things: if I know for sure that we can or can’t come, I send the RSVP back IMMEDIATELY. I never want to be that straggler RSVPer that the bride has to call. If I’m not sure on the date and likely won’t be for awhile, I call/email the bride to fill her in and ask if she’d like me to send in the card as a ’yes’ knowing we may cancel vs. hold on to it until we know for sure.
• Send My Love: Another thing I picked up from some of our amazing guests? I send a little note along, usually on the back of the RSVP. I always let them know how much I love their invitation and how excited and honored we are to have been invited.

On the Big Day

• Notice the Details: I always make sure to notice all the bride’s special details and take pictures of them when I can. Then I compliment, compliment, and compliment some more, especially regarding the dress, the decor and the little things—things I know brides put a lot of thought, time and effort into!
• Watch What I Wear: I don’t wear white—I know that this is a controversial topic for some of you, but in my opinion it’s better to be safe than sorry. I also stay away from the color of the bridesmaid dresses (unless they are black, I love LBDs too much), and flashy “look at me” colors like hot pink or bright red.
• Say Hello: I try to approach the bride and groom (unless they are already swarmed with people) instead of waiting for them to come to us, since I know how overwhelming it can be to try to visit everyone.
• Dance, Dance: Another thing? Burger and I dance as much as possible. We love dancing, so this isn’t hard, but I had the absolute best time at our wedding with our friends that were on the dance floor and like to return the favor when I can!
• Remember That My Wedding is Over: This is the most important—I try my hardest to avoid bridejacking (like mommyjacking)! This can be hard for me at times, since I just got married/planned a wedding and it is still fresh in my mind. The last thing anyone wants to hear about on their own or another person’s wedding day is my wedding!

Wedding Gifts

• Cash? : Just like with shower gifts, if the couple lives out of town, I will send the gift ahead of time so that they don’t have to worry about lugging it home or losing it in the post-wedding shuffle. Another option? Give MONEY. I was always brought up to believe that money was an impersonal gift. I don’t know about you guys, but we loved opening cards with cash, so we are more likely to give it as a gift in the future. Maybe we are greedy or something, but our kitchen and bedroom and bathroom were pretty much pimped out after our showers, and you can really only use so many crystal bowls, vases, and candle holders.
• Something Special: Another option if we want to give an actual gift? We go rogue - aka we don’t use the registry! Some of our most cherished wedding gifts came in the form of PSU paraphernalia (wine goblets, cookie cutters, chips & dip dish), and other personalized things, like these gorgeous mugs (from Jesso! notice the D+D ’10 on the tree?!) and this amazing sundial of our very own, complete with our unofficial wedding quote:

After the Wedding

• Post With Caution: I am one of those brides who absolutely loved seeing pictures on Facebook the day after the wedding—it was such instant gratification! One friend posted over 300 pics—every hour was like Christmas! My only rule? I don’t post unflattering pictures of the wedding party, and I’m not offended if they remove the tag or ask me to take one down.
• Say Thank You!: After our wedding, we experienced something so incredible I can’t even explain it to you…people thanked us for inviting them to our wedding. They called, sent emails, texts, and one special lady even sent a handwritten thank you note! I cannot explain to you how lovely it was to receive a note like that a few weeks after the big day. It was amazing. And it’s a tradition I hope to steal from her and pass on to all of you! So consider sending your friends and family a thank you for letting you share in their joy—they will absolutely love you for it!

What has planning a wedding or being a bride taught you about being a good wedding guest?