Cry, Cry Again

Cry, Cry Again

November 15th, 2010 @ 11:37 am by Ms. Sloth
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So, I’m a crier.

I cry at movies, I cry at TV shows. I cry when I’m sad, I cry when I’m angry, I cry when I’m happy, sometimes I cry for no discernible reason at all.

But one place I never cried before was at weddings. I suppose that it was because I’d never put too much thought into wedding ceremonies. While I always enjoyed them, a wedding for me was more about the party.

And then we got engaged, and I started realizing that a wedding ceremony is a BIG DEAL. And when I went to my first wedding after I got engaged, guess what happened?

Waterworks.

Since I couldn’t even get through my friends’ ceremony without shedding tears, I’m pretty certain that I’ll be bawling my eyes out at our own.

This is a problem, because I am not a distinguished crier. You know, the type who may have a few errant tears streaming down her still perfectly made up face. I am an ugly, ugly crier. A puffy face, red eyes, a snotty nose and a distorted grimace do not make a pretty bride.

Cry, Cry Again : wedding emotional philadelphia Heidi M heidi-m

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Cry, Cry Again : wedding emotional philadelphia Dwight dwight_

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Cry, Cry Again : wedding emotional philadelphia Dawson dawson-

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The sad thing about being an ugly crier is that, beyond wearing waterproof mascara, there’s not a damned thing I can do to better the situation. I just have to hope that our ceremony photos aren’t ruined by my big ugly crying face!

Is anyone else an ugly crier? Do you have any tips on avoiding crying that you can share?

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25 Responses to “Cry, Cry Again”

1 2 Last

Member

gill84 (message) 725 posts, Busy bee

I am an ugly crier, and I cry at anything (wedding included) but I was surprisingly able to keep it together at the wedding (distracted by thoughts of my makeup and everyone staring at me helped a little). So you could always hope that the adrenaline sees you through!

In any case, the people who love you and see you crying at your wedding are probably going to be touched and start crying themselves… rather than thinking about the ugly cry face

11/15/10 @ 11:50 am (reply)

Guest

Jill

I’m a huge crier. HUGE. Every wedding I go to or see on TV, I cry. Every engagement I hear about, I cry. When I read blog posts from bees, I freaking CRY!

On our wedding day - didn’t cry. Ok, I teared up a few times but made myself stop. I was too freaking happy that day to cry. What made me tear up? The Lord’s Prayer and listening to the words of our song for our first dance.

Suggestion - do what I did - don’t think about what you’re doing. Let it be a blur. Think about anything except what is being said. When I saw someone crying (Mom, Aunt, Hubs, MINISTER(!!!!) I gave the old, “It’s going to be ok” nod and whisper. Seeing other people cry actually made me not cry so much…weird. Haha.

Good luck!!!

11/15/10 @ 11:59 am (reply)

Member

Joanna910 (message) 65 posts, Worker bee

I am a crier too - I cry at movies, I cry at commercials, I cry at lots of things. But the even bigger problem is that I don’t know if I am in fact an ugly crier! In my head of course I look great while crying but who really knows! I just hope come wedding day I can keep it together and look nice through the whole thing!

11/15/10 @ 12:06 pm (reply)

Member

plantains (message) 2,433 posts, Buzzing bee

I am a huge crier too. I’m not so much worried about mascara as I am about having sniffles hahahaha

11/15/10 @ 12:11 pm (reply)

Member

SadieBee (message) 771 posts, Busy bee

I’m a big crier - I cry at commercials for heaven’s sake - and I tend to turn a lovely, SPLOTCHY shade of red. Good makeup will be my bestest friend on my wedding day.

11/15/10 @ 12:32 pm (reply)

Member

poormarylane (message) 35 posts, Newbee

Miss Sloth, I am exactly the same way, so I sympathize. The way I (along with a couple other bridesmaids and the lovely bride herself) got through my sister’s ceremony without weeping openly was by singing John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt in my head whenever I started getting verklempt. Sounds odd, but it worked pretty well!

11/15/10 @ 12:57 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Panther (message) 1,046 posts, Bumble bee

In addition to being an ugly crier, I also get MASSIVE headaches if I shed even a single tear. They don’t go away until I go to bed. So, crying is just NOT an option for me! I’ll let you know if I come up with any keeping-yourself-from-crying tricks.

11/15/10 @ 1:02 pm (reply)

Member

emma5w (message) 547 posts, Busy bee

My sister and I have this thing where, when we cry, we start to laugh. Especially if we make it funny. So when I started to completely lose it at our wedding, I pulled out some tissues from my cleavage, which made everyone laugh, and then I started to laugh at how ridiculous that must’ve looked and it made it all better…and there are some super-cute pictures to boot! So, stuff some tissues down there and whip them out when things get sticky!

11/15/10 @ 1:44 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Hippo (message) 1,008 posts, Bumble bee

I actually had someone tell me that they think to themselves, “I’m so pretty when I cry!” when they are crying. It always made them laugh to themselves, so the ugly cry turned into a smiley cry.

11/15/10 @ 1:45 pm (reply)

10.

Member

missbiscuit (message) 1,050 posts, Bumble bee

I <3 you for using the Dawson picture. lmao
And, yes, I too am stricken with the ugly cry curse. It will be large and in charge on our wedding day, I’m sure, but I’m just going to go with it. We’re supposed to soak in every moment, right?

11/15/10 @ 1:52 pm (reply)

11.

Member

MsTerrapin (message) 609 posts, Busy bee

I literally stopped halfway down the aisle at my wedding and to take deep breaths and fanned my face to try and stop crying. Everyone at the ceremony, including my FI, laughed and my FI said “Are you crying?! Don’t cry!”. The laughter helped me to not lose it completely. It was just a few welling up moments after that.

11/15/10 @ 2:02 pm (reply)

12.

Bee

Mrs. Trail Mix (message) 6,328 posts, Bee Keeper

Waahahahahah, that photo of Dawson is awesome.

And on a separate note, I am a TOTAL cried (like, out of control) but somehow didn’t end up being a complete mess at my wedding…It’s different when it’s you up there, ya know? Much easier to sob like a baby when you’re sitting in the stands

11/15/10 @ 2:03 pm (reply)

13.

Bee

Mrs. Hermit Crab (message) 3,562 posts, Sugar bee

omg Dawson’s Creek.

11/15/10 @ 3:05 pm (reply)

14.

Guest

greenebanana

DAWSON!! I used to love that show, although I was more of a Pacey girl. And yes, I cry my eyes out at weddings :o)

11/15/10 @ 3:26 pm (reply)

15.

Member

kvpoe (message) 82 posts, Worker bee

Excellent use of a classic Dawson-is-a-whiny-bitch shot! I think I had a few moments of ugly-gonna-cry face coming down the aisle at the beginning, but it was all smiles from there… waterproof mascara is a must! otherwise no words of wisdom…

11/15/10 @ 4:38 pm (reply)

16.

Guest

aggee

I’m an ugly crier…red eyes, snot, and hiccups. Yup, I’m hot. I like emma5w’s story of putting kleenex in her cleavage. might have to try that…

11/15/10 @ 5:02 pm (reply)

17.

Guest

jomi

I am also a crier. Ugly yes. I don’t need to describe, since everyone else has. But, I chose to wrap a beautiful vintage hankie around my bouquet. That way it was close at hand but not noticeable in pictures. And yes it came in handy. I read lots of people suggestions on “letting it go by in a blur” or think about something else. Although this works on a day to day bases and a method I employ, it’s not one I’m glad I chose for my wedding. I didn’t want it to be a blur, I wanted to be present. But as a crier, I accepted it. Embraced and prepared for it. Why be someone I am not? On my wedding day i want to be 100% me, and my family knows I cry. I think that because of all that for the first time in my life, I didn’t cry. Well a two tears, but I didn’t do the standard ugly cry. You’ll be surprised come that day, how pulled together you will be due to adrenaline and happiness. On the other hand, my husband cried (the non-crier) maybe there is a universe warp to make this happen.

11/15/10 @ 5:22 pm (reply)

18.

Member

spitfire229 (message) 377 posts, Helper bee

Oh, I’m totally an ugly crier too! I am actually kind of worried about it. I want to read a poem to my FI…er husband at the reception during my speech, which I still tear up reading it. My “action plan” (Operation: Don’t Cry) is I need to get to the point of reading it enough times that I’m almost de-sensitized from the poem so I can get through it, without crying.

I’m also trying to tell my parents and BMs how I feel BEFORE the wedding (how much I love them, am thankful etc.) so that I don’t leave it all bottled in for the speech at the reception!

11/15/10 @ 5:42 pm (reply)

19.

Bee

Mrs. Octopus (message) 1,446 posts, Bumble bee

I would not have guessed this about you, Sloth! Like some of the other girls said, you may surprise yourself. In our relationship–shhh, don’t tell him I’m telling you–Mr. Octo is TOTALLY the crier. Like, a really big, ugly, sobby crier. He is a huge sap and has no shame. I was legit concerned that he would SOB during our ceremony and it would be awkward. Yet he did not! He got a little choked up, but 100% held it together. You never know!

Side note: I chuckled at Heidi and Dwight, then said HAAAA!!!! out loud when I got to Dawson.

11/15/10 @ 8:28 pm (reply)

20.