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When you first get engaged it seems like everyone—from your mother, to your recently wedded friends, to the lady behind you in line at the post office—has some advice about what you must or must not do at your wedding. And let’s face it, a lot of it is probably irrelevant to the wedding you and your betrothed are planning. (“Your napkins need to be the same color as your dress!” “Make sure you have at least one harpist!” “If you serve cupcakes your marriage won’t be valid!”) But one of the things I’ve learned to do while planning this wedding is not to shut everyone out; sometimes you can learn from those who have been there before (as brides, grooms, MOHs, guests, vendors, etc…).
I’ve had two recently married friends insist that we hire a videographer.
One had hired one and was in love with her video, the other hadn’t hired one and it was her one wedding regret. So I listened. We hired a videographer. And now we have big plans for our videographer, that you’ll just have to wait to see…
There is another piece of advice the hive has echoed over and over again: hire a Day of Coordinator, or DOC. Without the hive I’m not sure if I would have set aside room in the budget for a DOC. But I read over and over again how helpful a DOC (or a full planner) could be, and again I listened. We will have a DOC for our wedding. I want the wedding day to be as stress-free as possible, and knowing that the DOC will be the one taking care of all the little details and putting out any fires is a huge relief. As much as the detail-obsessed-control-freak in me wants to be setting up the escort table and arranging the cupcake/dessert table myself, I’m pretty sure I’ll prefer spending my time getting dolled up with my bridesmaids and taking some pretty pictures with my groom. Bonus: our DOC is also our florist—I love hiring two vendors with one stone—er, I mean one contract.
What advice have you taken in planning your wedding? What advice would you give to people just starting to plan?
I also hired a DOC because of the overwhelming advice to do so! BUT I am going to do my own flowers despite the overwhelming advice NOT to do so. 
Ms. Doxie, you can totally do your own flowers (I did) but just make sure you have enough time/help.
And I third the videographer recommendation. I’m like your 2nd friend who regrets not having one…
We’re hiring a videographer bc a couple friends told it was something they wished they had done.
Definitely hoping to budget in a videographer! =] We’ve heard so many couples say they regret not doing it! =]
Completely agree with the DOC/planner and videographer bits!! To early planners, I would caution against booking vendors too early - get your venue and date set in stone (re: contracted, signed and delivered) before going crazy. That being said, the really good vendors get booked early so give yourself lead time (up to a year for the really big names!).
To mid and late planners I would say the 3rd thing to add to the list is professional hair and makeup - it’s kinda silly to spend all this money on a dress, photos and video and then have your look fade away by cocktail hour. (Have seen this multiple times as a bridesmaid and a guest.) A sneaky way to do this for brides on a budget is to book a “lesson”at MAC where you just buy the makeup they use morning of.
Other tip - if you need to cut costs, cut favors. Nobody missed them!!
I really wish we had a videographer. My advice is SPEND MONEY ON PHOTOGRAPHY! Do not cut corners here, although if you want to cut a little bit you can skip the e-pics if you are super comfortable with your photog’s work (like we were). Also, skip favors…no one even cares.
Wedding advice I am listening to:
*Spend money on a great photographer
*Get a videographer
*Save money on flowers
*DIY to the best of your ability
Advice I’m not taking:
*No DOC - Nobody in our area does those, and the weddings turn out fine
*Use a family member’s photography to “save money” - Can we say disaster?
*We don’t need to book vendors so early - My FI’s advice - He’s crazy! lol
AAAH I really hope you hired Franck! Please, say you did!
And my planning advice is to designate one day a week (at least!) to take a break from the planning — a wedding Sabbath, if you will.
@tweds: @jordynrose: Great advice!
@Coffeecake: Unfortunately Frank was already booked on our date 
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Ms. Cheetah, Los Angeles/Palm Springs Age and Occupation: 31, Artist, Educator Fiance's Age and Occupation: 32, TV Finance Engagement Date: April 2010 Wedding Date: March 2011 Venue: The Viceroy About Me: I’m a silly, sassy lady with a compulsion to create. I love to sing and dance, despite the fact that I lack any talent doing either. I somehow manage to be messy and organized at the same time. I like to spend my days road tripping, watching '80s movies, reading true crime books, buying things on sale, sending postcards, playing board games, dining at food trucks, snuggling, and drinking ginger ale. I have a weak spot for all things sweet, especially Mr. Cheetah! I’m a Chicago girl and he’s a Nor Cal boy but we love living in the City of Angels. After 10 years as a couple we are planning a fun-filled semi-destination wedding in Palm Springs. Hope you enjoy the ride!
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