Weddingbee Blog

As a person who likes to “do it all herself” I thought I was doing my mom a favor by not hassling her with the details. Boy, was I wrong. I really cherish the day she and I went shopping for her MOB dress and the memories that we created. When I read the letter that she wrote to my aunt about our day I knew that I had been so wrong to try to keep her “out of the details” and that day was so much more than a shopping trip. One of my favorite memories from our wedding day is my mom bouncing (literally on cloud nine) around the reception and dancing with me. This memory captures how beautiful my mom felt in her pink dress and sassy heels. She radiated joy and a youthful excitement. I tear up just thinking about it.

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Sometimes I get ahead of myself and leave the people I love behind. When there is a long list of things to be done and I see an opportunity to check something off the list I do it. Last fall, just a month after getting engaged I saw a great MOB suit on sale.

Knowing that my Mom was conscious about money I snatched it up for her and was proud of myself for finding a great deal. She seemed to like the suit enough, it was a great color for her and had a fun ruffle detail. It looked like something that my Mom would wear. She told me she loved it and with some alterations it would work. I checked off the box “MOB dress” and moved on.

As I’ve shared my struggle to make sure I am engaging my Mom in the wedding details many of you have suggested going shopping for the MOB dress. With the suit already purchased I dismissed this as unnecessary.

I shouldn’t have.

At the urging of my Aunt S and Uncle C (Aunt S is an avid reader of my wedding blogging) I realized that my Mom might want something more special than the suit I had already purchased and that the journey to find her dress was as much or more important than the dress itself. It took a very kind letter from my aunt and uncle to get through to me and I am glad that they took the time. I would love to tell you about our day, but I can’t do better than my Mom’s own words, as written in a letter to her brother and sister-in-law, with photos from the day sprinkled in.

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The day had everything in it; laughter, giggles, much love and bonding, changing minds and perceptions, coming out of shells—for me—Pretzel doesn’t need one, drama and resolution, a delightful lunch, and oh yes, shopping for moderately high-heel shoes.

@ Nordstrom

We started out at the flagship Nordstrom in Seattle. I had picked out some styles online only to get there to find out they do not have the same buyers in the store so nothing I had picked out was there. So, we made a decision to “wing it”—imagine that, two over-planners winging it!

We tried on everything: sheaths, prints, low necks, high necks, lots of bling, elegant, sophisticated, charming, tight fitting (oh my) and one loose fitting. Matron of Honor Tig, in Colorado, was participating as Miss Pretzel would take pictures in the dressing room and email them to Tig and we took her comments under consideration. We laughed and giggled as the personality of each dress was taken into consideration! I liked one that was silver and very elegant, but they had a point that it looked too much like a mother of the groom dress.

So I came out of my shell and selected two others that looked really nice. Tig and Pretzel liked one I picked out—it is really cute and the color is very flattering.

@ Nordstrom

@ Nordstrom (THE dress is size too small)

@ Macy’s

After putting them on hold we were off to Talbots and Macy’s just to be sure… we were sure in a short period of time! I selected the fuchsia one from Nordstrom, but I needed in a different size that they had at the store near where we live.

Nine West “Dive In” Pump Nordstrom Exclusive

We checked out the shoes at Nordstrom’s and found a pair of high (for me!) heels that are really cute; gray to go with the fuchsia dress! They are really nice!!! So we picked up a take out lunch at Nordstrom and ate on the way to the other store.

On the way, Pretzel received an exasperating call from MOH Tig- David’s Bridal had messed up Tig’s dress order for the second time and there was not enough time to order a new one. Pretzel had me lane diving across three lanes into the David’s Bridal parking lot, as we were just passing by one.

Have you ever seen a ticked off Pretzel? I did, but she got the Assistant Manger on the case and they are going to break policy of never rushing an order, to get the right size, style, and color for Tig here the week before the wedding so MOH Tig can be in Seattle early to get the rush alterations. I am praying all to be coordinated and arrive on time!!

Then we drove over to Nordstrom’s and picked up the dress, a bra, and Spanx. We had the dressed pinned for alterations all without breaking stride in our fun. This day was a gift from God! I really can’t believe we got all that accomplished and managed to keep our girl-like fun time.

It just is such an overwhelming relief to me to know that I can have such a nice dress for her wedding, but more importantly for being able to spend the day sharing in the details of the wedding. It was important for both of us—we are similar in many ways yet so different and I respect her differences and she does likewise.

~ Mamma Pretzel

My Mom’s letter thanking my aunt and uncle for encouraging both of us to go shopping for a different dress really touched me. It humbled me and made me realize that sometimes I get caught up in getting stuff done that I miss opportunities to build memories and have fun. I wish I had a video to show you the hilarity that ensued in the dressing rooms and the fits of giggles into which we would periodically collapse.

I’m happy to show you my mom, in her bright and fun dress, perfect for our summer wedding.

Hot Mamma Pretzel, no?

What did you “check off the list” too early in the planning process, only to go back and redo later?