Weddingbee Blog

Allow me to take a brief interlude from recaps to vent some rage. I have been, and always will be, keeping it real with the hive. While our wedding day was fabulous, fun, amazing, etc. there was some truly awful behavior demonstrated by our guests. I want to talk about how to be a good guest in the realest way possible so that (hopefully) future brides will be prepared for what to expect. Now when I say you, you know I don’t mean you, right? I mean the heinous people that might potentially pull these faux pas, and yes, some of our  guests. Not you. You’re lovely.

So you’ve sent in your RSVP (promptly, of course) and now your etiquette duties are over, right? Nope! First of all, don’t bother the bride and groom close to the wedding. I cannot tell you how many needy phone calls I got the days leading up to the wedding.

I got a lot of what I apparently needed to be doing in correlation to what a guest/vendor/whoever needed. “Can you help me with…?” and “What do you think I should…?” are things that can be deferred to someone working the wedding, someone in the wedding party, or the parents of the couple. A bride has a lot more she needs to get done than what’s on your personal agenda for the wedding. It was also extremely annoying to hear excuses when I needed to be hearing nothing at all. Now I understand why so many bees have a no cell phone policy on their wedding day.

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We did have some amazing guests that were able to anticipate our needs and were ready to spring into action. Now that’s love and understanding!

One of the simplest things to do on the day of the wedding is to be on time or early.

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Of course, every bride cares about her guests’ safety, comfort, happiness, and appetites. But this day isn’t about you—it isn’t even about the bride. It’s about two people coming together and sharing one of the most special moments of their lives with family and friends. And you’re screwing it up if you show up even 5 minutes late. HBIC in charge Emily Post judges you! If you do need to come late, be as discreet as possible and again, don’t make excuses. (”It wasn’t my fault my hair wasn’t cooperating!”)

Apologize, congratulate and enjoy the night. This was the biggest problem at our wedding and I was told so many dumb, whiny reasons for being late when all someone had to do was be gracious. I could not believe how rude people were—many people missed the ceremony completely, some missed the cocktail hour, and some just showed up to eat and socialize! We wound up starting our ceremony 15 minutes late with a third of the guests missing or just taking their seats.

Which leads to another very important rule: don’t not show up. If you have to no-show, the day of the apologetic/congratulatory card sent before the wedding is not dead. Hell, a text, phone call to a mutual friend or family member, even a Facebook message is better than leaving the happy couple hanging and wondering where you are all night. In the end, we had 5 no shows and a ton of leftovers. I was surprised by the amount of guests who knew in advance they or a member of their family was going to no show and didn’t let a Glasses team member know, including one of our ceremony readers!

You would think this would be a given, but don’t steal! Whoever stole a couple of Mrs. Stripes mason jars even after we made an announcement…not cool.

You’re awesome, it’s great to see you, but don’t hog the couple’s time. I got pulled over for the longest catch up chats and photograph sessions and didn’t have a back out plan. I was so hungry!

If you’ve been given the honor of speaking at the wedding, think about how you are acting in front of everyone. Mama Glasses toast was, “Thank God this is all over. Cheers!”

Don’t draw attention away from the bride with your outfit. Leave your 6 inch stilettos, skin-tight dress with the boobilicious cleavage at home (this totally happened, BTW). Oh, and anything white can stay home, too (that happened, too).

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It’s okay to buy a wedding gift off the registry. We got a barn owl that lives in England. ’Nuff said.

Stop asking the couple when the baby is coming.

We had a lovely time at the wedding and were truly thankful for the people who were well-behaved and made our night so special. I can honestly say I did not scream, cry, or get upset that day. I just went with the flow and did my best to keep calm and carry on.

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Of course, I’m here now, and it’s been very therapeutic. I’ve got some dirt on my shoulder, could you brush it off for me?

Have you witnessed truly appalling behavior at a wedding? Did any of your guests pull major faux pas?