Weddingbee Blog

I think just about every little girl thought about her wedding growing up; whether she’s a tomboy, a princess, or a brainiac, she’s probably thought of it at least once. Maybe the tomboy mused about the upset of wearing sneakers with her wedding dress, or maybe she even wanted to forgo the dress altogether to wear a pair of pants. The princess imagined the fairytale wedding that only Disney can truly capture, complete with a tiara and a horse-drawn carriage. The brainiac imaged walking down the aisle in a library on her dad’s arm to marry the smartest boy she’d ever met.

Hive, please meet the young Miss Bacon, circa 1987.

In the end, each fantasy wasn’t about the way her mom would cry as she saw her little girl all grown up, or about what the groom might want. Instead, it was all about the wedding of the bride’s dreams. Movies, books, magazines, and the entire wedding industry always stress how important it is for the bride’s vision to become a reality, but what about the groom??

When we got engaged, almost every married man that we knew pulled Mr. Bacon aside and encouraged him to just go along with whatever I wanted and to just show up at the right time and place when I said to. Those are men of a different generation; men of a generation who had weddings bankrolled by the bride’s family; men of a generation that saw the wedding as the bride’s day, not a day for the couple.

Much to the surprise of our moms, Mr. Bacon has been pretty involved in many of the decisions of the wedding. We want this day to be a reflection of us, our relationship, and who WE are, not just me. Luckily, we both love the color red, we like the same kind of music, we have the same vision for the party we want to throw, and we are the kings of compromise. Before I call a vendor, I show the mister their website to get his opinion, and I do my best to make sure that he is there when I meet with them. He is even willing to sit with me as I watch every show on WeTV’s Wedding Sunday. Sure, he gets bored with some of the wedding details, but he doesn’t want to be a passive groom who shows up to a wedding that doesn’t reflect any piece of him.

How is he being included, you might ask? Any way he wants to be. Going into planning, he only requested three things: a photobooth, a Storm Trooper helmet for people to wear in the photobooth, and a late-night hot dog bar. So far, he’s gotten all of it. Since then he chose Converse sneakers for all the men in the wedding, he picked out STD designs, he helped pick the photographer, florist, and venue, and we might even have him enter the ceremony to his favorite band, Van Halen. Are these things all my style? Some of them are, and some of them aren’t (like the Storm Trooper mask), but it’s his big day, too. After all, a wedding is about the union of TWO people, not just about the lady in the white dress.

Well, maybe not quite…