- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee Blog
I’m a pretty emotional person, and generally wear my emotions on my sleeve, as much as I like to think I have a poker face. (Ha. Notsomuch.) I cry when watching movies. (Toy Story 3 was the last one. Also probably Avatar. But I blame the 3D on that one.) I cry when reading books. (I may or may not have bawled through the entire last few chapters of the sixth Harry Potter. And, um, more high-brow literature as well that I just can’t think of at the moment.) And I’m a very empathetic person, which comes through whether it’s with literary characters or my own friends.
But when it comes to dealing with my own emotions, I tend to keep things inside. Unfortunately, that’s not generally a healthy way of dealing with emotion. Because what often happens when I keep things inside is that the emotions have to find a release one way or another. And a big, long, excessive amount of crying is usually my release. I actually discovered when I was in law school that it ended up being one of my end-of-semester rituals. I never noticed it until I was almost out of school, but at some point within a day or so of finishing my last final of the semester, something would trigger a massive emotional breakdown where I just let everything out. I believe it was just the massive amount of stress and pressure that I was putting on myself that wasn’t released until all of my studying and finals were over. And if I didn’t consciously do something to release it, my body would end up helping the process along.
I hadn’t realized just how stressed about wedding planning and life I had gotten until I broke down in tears last week. As usual, it was over a stupid and ridiculous argument that Mr. EB and I were having, but it got blown up into so much more in my head, and everything came out in a string of words that I’m not really proud of. But it did serve as a big wake-up call that it’s not at all fair to Mr. EB when I bottle things up and let them explode over ridiculous things. I have to find another escape valve for emotional stress than crying breakdowns. I’ve been working out a lot more, which helps, but I also need to find ways to manage my stress levels in the first place so they don’t ever get to the point of me crying hysterically.
Other than trying to maintain a healthy lifestyle, any other tips out there for managing wedding stress during these last few crazy months (and, you know, for life after wedding planning)?
well i know you kind of already do this with blogging, but I am the same way with my emotions, so instead of letting them get all bottled up, i write down how I am feeling and what is going on in wedding world. That way I can look back and have perspective and see that”yes I was clearly stressed look at everything that was going on”
Talking with people. Friends, Mr. EB, family members that you’re close to - just talking on a regular basis about whatever is on your mind at the moment. If I didn’t do that I would lose my mind. But then, I am something of an oversharer. 
You are not alone. I will never forget my first wedding-induced breakdown. It was over ties, and we were on a busy downtime shopping street, and it completely caught my FI off guard. but I didn’t realize until that moment how much weight I was carrying, so I can’t offer a great solution to the stress. If you figure out ways - share your secrets!
Get a spa day - and not one that you have to pay for. I get a book (like Harry Potter!), fill the tub up, and soak myself till I’m prune-y as can be. Then (after many hysterical breakdowns that we’ve been through) I’ve convinced my FH that he really needs to help me and rub my back. Then I rub his - works out for both of us nicely. If he’s not around, I have the hand-held, plastic back rub tool to use myself. Wrose case scenario is I beaaaat it out of a pillow. lol.
I don’t have much advice to offer, because I’m the exact same way. I have started crying more than once because Mr. Biscuit isn’t doing much for the wedding. To be fair, it’s because he’s afraid he’ll screw something up, but still. Sometimes, when life comes snowballing at you, as do wedding things, you just have to cry a little.
[...] Stress Relief | Weddingbee weddingbee.com/2011/02/03/stress-relief-3/ – view page – cached I’m a pretty emotional person, and generally wear my emotions on my sleeve, as much as I like to think I have a poker face. (Ha. Notsomuch.) I cry when [...]
Yoga is the only thing that turns off my Type-A brain. It’s 1.5 hours of brain quiet plus stretching and burning some calories.
oh boy, I think we might be emotional twins - from the last several chapters of HP6 (seriously, my roommate at the time walked in at one point to make sure I was ok bc she could HEAR me crying, and I was freaking reading Harry Potter - classic)…right down to the law school post-exam breakdown - did it every time! I second the hot bath suggestion, sometimes that helps me - but really, I think crying just gets it out of your system and sometimes you’ve just gotta do it!
We must be on the same wedding cycle because I had my official breakdown last Thursday night.
For me, Pure Barre is my sanity. I love it so much! It’s 50 minute pretty intense workout based on pilates and ballet. I come out of there feeling so much better about the world. Seeing as you’re a Seattle girl, I should mention that there’s one in U-Village and one in Bellevue. 
I know it probably isn’t best but I totally just have a big cry after the stress has built up, every few months or so. It happens when I finally lay down in bed and let my body relax and then it all comes out! Afterward I feel soooo much better. My problem is that I used to just cry when I was alone but now that FI and I live together he gets upset seeing me cry.
Oh lawd. I say nothing until I have snotty cry face and blubber out all 19083049823 things on my mind. No suggestion other than I try to soak in the support that my FI gives me when it happens and just let it.all.out. I feel so much better afterwards.
And running. That is probably more productive.
I handle emotions about the same way, so I hope this can help:
+ Laugh. A good laughing fit provides much the same emotional release as a good cry, but is lots more fun. I suggest copious silliness - tickle/pillow fights with the fiance, a night of watching stand-up comedy on TV - whatever it is that makes you giggle.
+ Touch. Seek out physical contact (hugs, hand holding, sex), especially with your fiance. Sometimes I don’t really feel like reaching out if I’m super stressed, but I do it anyway and it always makes me feel happier.
+ Play with your puppy. This kind of goes with the first suggestion because I know nothing on earth that is better at provoking a giggle than my two goofdogs. But it’s exercise too!
+ If you are the outdoorsy type, find a beautiful spot in nature and just let yourself be. Go say hello to the mountains.
As mentioned above, hot baths (with or without crying) and backrubs also work wonders.
Hope you feel better soon!
I used to be the same, I would bottle everything up and then think that it was so overwhelming! I have tried a number of different distractions - yoga, running, spa sessions etc. but i found that all they did was delay the breakdown.
Now what I do is I sit down and write down all the things that are stressing me out - even the little things and then either by myself or usually with my FI we work out action plans to resolve them! eg So much to do for the wedding! Action - we need to review the to-do list and ensure we are both evenly distributing tasks and then look at calendar and block out time for them and then when we have no more time in come parents/bridal party/friends etc.
Hope that helps! Sometimes I find myself writing my list in the middle of the night just to get it all out of my brain so that i can go to sleep!
You and I? two peas in a pod. Sorry, I have no solid advice, but I am working on it too. Mr P knows that I have this tendency and so he’s good at trying to get me to release it in smaller more healthy ways but every once in a while it explodes and its messy.
We sound pretty similar! I cry over everything, mostly commercials lately, and while the FI finds that humorous, he doesn’t enjoy the blowups from when I’m holding in the stress. At one point, he asked what he could do, and I had been so upset that I was the one doing everything for the wedding (calling, emailing, thinking about logistics) that I asked him to plan it. He agreed, and was officially in charge of all things wedding…for about three weeks. I inevitably took back over cause I can’t help myself but that break was incredibly nice. Just knowing he was doing it for me, and to not have to think wedding gave me time to enjoy all the other stressors in life I had been avoiding Try to put away wedding stuff for at least a day to start. Start delegating projects that need to be done. And treat yourself to something you like to do. And most importantly, keep the conversation open and flowing, and if you’re unhappy or stressed, express that in a calm fashion. Hope that helps, and good luck!
Just keep it real, yo. If you’re feeling at the end of your rope, admit it to yourself and maybe someone close to you, and talk it out. Walk away (I have trouble with this) from things that are driving you insane: finances, other people, vendors ARGH, etc.
I’m a big fan of inner peace, and it (this whole process, all of it) is all about keeping it intact!
Wine helps, too
I’m so with you - about three weeks before our wedding, I had a total meltdown over laundry. Yes, over not having time to do laundry.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Mrs. Eggs Benedict, Seattle Age and Occupation: 29, Attorney Fiance's Age and Occupation: 35, Attorney Engagement Date: December 5, 2009 Wedding Date: February 2011 Venue: IslandWood About Me: I'm a Northwest girl who spends my time goofing around with Mr. Eggs Benedict and our dog, hiking, traveling, drinking wine and planning a wedding that will showcase the best of what the Pacific Northwest has to offer. I also love photography, beating Mr. Eggs Bene at Mario Kart, and watching the most ridiculous natural disaster flicks you can think of (seriously, how can you deny the awesomeness that is The Core or 2012?? That's right, you can't). We are planning our weekend wedding adventure at an environmental educational center, and I can't wait for the fun to begin!
| Sun | Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 29 | 30 | 31 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |
| 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 |
| 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 |
| 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 |
| 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 |
Latest Gallery Pics