Weddingbee Blog

Throughout the majority of our relationship, Sparks has been nothing but sweet, thoughtful, caring, and hilarious. He’s the kind of guy that loves to have a good time, hates drama, and would never do anything to intentionally make me angry. He’s laid back. He’s a lover.

Exhibit A: Sweet, caring Sparks carries me back to the car after my first marathon. What a guy.

However.

When we first started dating, there were a few…um…moments in which Sparks would do something so inexplicably crazy and out of character that I was left dumbfounded. This is mostly because we met in college, alcohol was usually involved, and we had a lot of free time on our hands. Still, I’ve been threatening him with blackmail ever since said events, and I’ve always told him that “If we ever get engaged, these stories are coming out at the rehearsal dinner.” (Or a wedding blog. Same thing?)

Exhibit B: Hello, college Sparks.

When we last left off, you might remember that Sparks had charmed me with his flip-cup skills, wooed me with a bloody horror flick, and invited me to his fraternity date party. It was college romance at its finest.

I was really excited for this particular party because it would be my first date with Sparks in the presence of all of his friends. I spent the entire afternoon getting ready. I bought a new outfit, got my fake tan on…the whole shebang. But when my roommate and I sauntered over to meet the boys later that night, Sparks was nowhere to be found.

At first, I figured that he was just getting ready and running a little late (as usual). But as it got closer to party time and Sparks still wasn’t answering my phone calls, I cornered his roommate and demanded to know where he was. And, you guys, what came out of his mouth next was quite possibly the most ridiculous sentence anyone has ever uttered about Sparks:

“Oh, he’s in a rap battle. I think he might actually win.”

I’m sorry. What?

WHAT?

I waited a minute to see if he was joking. But he was dead serious. Somewhere on campus, my future fiancé was involved in a freestyle battle so intense he couldn’t even leave to attend his own party.

I couldn’t decide if this was hilarious or a gigantic…weird…red flag (cue that dumbfounded feeling). I didn’t have much time to think about it, though, because Sparks came barreling onto the back deck just a few minutes later. He proceeded to announce two things.

1. No, he had not been victorious, and

2. Yes, he would be late because (obviously) this had been a stressful event and he would need to shower and get ready for the evening.

So I left for the party sans date. Things weren’t off to a very good start.

Sparks eventually showed up, and we did have a good time. As the evening began to wind down, I decided I should head home. Obviously, I wanted Sparks to walk me back, but he told me he just wasn’t ready to go. I huffed and puffed about it for a minute, but he wouldn’t budge. He said that after his historic loss, he just needed to hang with his friends and blow off some steam. He then proceeded to offer me his sweater and tell me that my friends were heading back if I wanted to walk with them.

I just remember staring at Sparks thinking, “This guy is serious! He wants me to take his sweater and get out of here!” (I was dumbfounded for the second time that night.)

Not having a lot of options, I snatched Sparks’s sweater from him and stormed off with our buddies. I only made it to the end of the driveway before chucking the sweater into the front yard and thinking, “Screw him.” I decided I never, EVER, wanted to see Sparks again.

I woke up the next morning pretty proud of myself for ignoring Sparks’s late-night apologetic phone calls and texts. I was heading downstairs to grab breakfast when I saw something that made me stop dead in my tracks. There was Sparks’s sweater on the kitchen counter. THE sweater that I had angrily thrown out last night. How the HECK did it end up in my kitchen??? I was a little freaked. I nervously glanced around the house, half expecting Sparks to pop up like a crazy stalker.

Turns out, my roommate had left the party shortly after me, spotted the sweater in the front yard, and (being cold and intoxicated) scooped it up and threw it on. She had no idea it was Sparks’s sweater when she tossed it on the counter at home.

I had no choice but to return the sweater to Sparks later that day. I didn’t want it lying around my house reminding me of such a horrible night. But, just like that damn sweater, I wasn’t able to get rid of Sparks. I didn’t make it easy for him to get back on my good side, but he put up a good fight…and I’m sure glad he did.

College Sparklers, looking like babies.

The funniest part about this whole story is that Sparks still gets upset if I bring it up. Not upset that he ignored me on our second date. Not upset that he made me walk home alone. But upset that he lost a freestyle battle. Go figure.

Love you anyway, Sparks. Maybe there’s a rematch in your future.