Saying Grace

Saying Grace

March 30th, 2011 @ 2:58 pm by Mrs. Candy Apple
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A few weekends ago, Mr. Candy Apple and I went to our Pre-Cana. We are now officially able to get married in the Church! For those of you who don’t know, Pre-Cana is the required marriage-prep course for all couples getting married in the Catholic Church. Some programs are an entire weekend; ours was Saturday from 2PM to 10PM. In all honesty, I kind of wish we had done the full-weekend version!

I actually really enjoyed the program, but Mr. Candy Apple said he didn’t get much out of it. We were separated into small groups (about six couples to a group), and each group included a host couple. Essentially, there were lots of presentations by the host couples—men and women who are married (some for over 35 years) and were volunteering to share their experiences with us. It was really nice to hear from these people and listen to what helps keep their relationships strong. It sort of reminds me of the “After I Do” series! You get to hear about what marriage is really like.

There were also lots of exercises that we did—individually, as couples, and as a group. I liked these because they asked the big questions about marriage and helped get us thinking about how our lives will change when we are married, when we have kids, etc. Fun stuff to think about!

One question that came up was the idea of traditions and practices. What traditions do our families have? What do we want to bring into our new family? A lot of the host families talked about how they integrated their old traditions and practices into their new families, particularly when they started having children, and what new traditions they have started.

Saying Grace : wedding relationships religious seattle Ca12 ca1

Painting by Norman Rockwell / Image via Art Renewal Center

Mr. Candy Apple and I used to sit down at the table every night together for dinner, but recently we’ve taken to eating in front of the TV. Together, still, but it is definitely not the sort of focused together-ness that we had before.

Since Pre-Cana, we’ve decided to start eating at the table again, saying grace before the meal, and talking about our highs and lows from the day. I think dinner is a good time to slow down and focus on the day, the meal, and each other, and it will be a great thing to carry on once we have children. I really like thinking about how we will continue doing this when we start a family and how it will bring us all closer together.

Saying Grace : wedding relationships religious seattle Ca22 ca2

Painting by Norman Rockwell / Image via The Archive

What practices are you hoping to bring into your marriage? Any faith-based or spiritual practices that you would like to continue? That you are hoping to start? What did you think of your Pre-Cana/marriage-prep class(es)?

Tags: relationships, religious, seattle |

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13 Responses to “Saying Grace”

Member

Damselfly (message) 96 posts, Worker bee

Just wanted to say I love that you used Rockwell’s pix! He could always say something so well without a single word.

3/30/11 @ 3:42 pm (reply)

Guest

sami

Good questions! I’m not sure if I will bring any practices into my marriage. I grew up in a very religious family, every single sunday I went to church until I moved out when I was 23, so maybe if we have kids one day (still not sure if we will), I will bring them to church and stuff, but idk really… I know one thing, I can’t stop eating in front of the TV! We usually talk about our day while we make dinner. Then wind down in front of the TV We haven’t done of pre-maritial counseling yet, when we do I’ll come back and do another comment!

3/30/11 @ 3:46 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Carousel (message) 590 posts, Busy bee

Mr. Caro and I are really lucky because we get a lot of quality time together: we work in the same office, so we walk to work together, have lunch together and walk back home together. We then make dinner together. So by the time we’re ready to eat we’ve already talked a lot and are ready to just relax and watch some tv! If we will stop working together and lose all that quality time we will as well have to make adjustments to make up for it…

3/30/11 @ 3:53 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Hyena (message) 1,881 posts, Buzzing bee

We eat in front of the TV most of the time too, and I told Mr. H it wasn’t going to stay that way! I miss eating at a table!

3/30/11 @ 4:04 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Tartlet (message) 3,207 posts, Sugar bee

I’d also like to eat dinner at a table more often. We’re not going to have a whole lot “us” time over the next few years, and I’d like to use the meal as an opportunity to slow down and catch up, too.

3/30/11 @ 4:55 pm (reply)

Bee

Mrs. Earrings (message) 2,477 posts, Buzzing bee

We’ve been eating in front of the tv a lot too…your post has got me thinking that we need to make a couple of changes now though. Like buying a dining table

3/30/11 @ 5:01 pm (reply)

Member

Knubbsy-Wubbsy (message) 2,395 posts, Buzzing bee

While we usually eat dinner on the couch rather than table (we/he have a bar height table and the chairs are a little too big for my 5-footness) we do make a point to pray before dinner. We also try to be in a bible study of some sort though I think a couple’s devotional would be a great next step for us.
Our marriage prep class was great- the organization and our group was run by a church deacon and his wife and the group was 5-6 couples all around the same age, met for 6 weeks and then had a weekend retreat.

3/30/11 @ 5:32 pm (reply)

Bee

Miss Cotton Candy (message) 436 posts, Helper bee

We eat our dinner on the couch since our kitchen table is filled with wedding shiz right now but i love your idea of saying grace!

3/30/11 @ 10:14 pm (reply)

Member

Miss Sydney (message) 749 posts, Busy bee

I LOVE eating at the table. We received a beautiful candle stick set for our engagement and I love to light them and eat dinner with my FI!

Also, dont mean to be a debby downer know it all, but Pre-cana is not required to marry in the catholic church, it is just certain diocese that require it. Our priest has known us for 5 years and we asked about how to book in etc and he said that he had seen us speak about everything that comes up in Pre-cana so he didnt think we needed to! But i kind of would have liked to!

3/30/11 @ 11:52 pm (reply)

10.

Bee

Mrs. Meerkat (message) 3,216 posts, Sugar bee

I love that you guys are eating dinner at the table together. What a great thing to take away from your session.

3/31/11 @ 10:43 am (reply)

11.

Bee

Miss Elephant (message) 6,182 posts, Bee Keeper

Our dining room table is covered with my work and wedding things, so we normally eat in front of the tv. As soon as the wedding projects are gone we both had decided to go back to eating at the table. I know that is something we both want when kids come into the picture.

3/31/11 @ 11:15 am (reply)

12.

Member

Miss OBG (message) 1,272 posts, Bumble bee

We eat almost every night at our coffee table in front of the TV. The problem is we don’t really have a table to eat at. We’re house-hunting right now, so I really hope we’ll end up with a dining room and can actually sit down to meals like adults.

4/4/11 @ 12:07 pm (reply)

13.

Bee

Mrs. Pretzel (message) 1,893 posts, Buzzing bee

We eat together at the dinner table every night. We also bless our food whether or not we are out at a restaurant, with friends, etc. When we rush I feel like something is missing.

4/5/11 @ 8:24 pm (reply)