Hemlines, Necklines, and Fabrics, Oh My!

Hemlines, Necklines, and Fabrics, Oh My!

April 27th, 2011 @ 8:38 am by Mrs. Snow Cone
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Before I even ventured out into the big bad world of BM dresses, I was most definitely scared. I had looked through a good number of dress options, and nothing had jumped out at me as the perfect choice. I was definitely leaning toward the highly descriptive phrase of “purple and short,” but beyond that, I was lost.

I grappled with a couple different options, like:

1) Everyone in the exact same dress.

Image via Martha Stewart Weddings / Photo by Melissa Musgrove

This selection seems to be a bit antiquated in today’s wedding world, but it still has its merit. Obviously, with this choice we’d get the most consistent look across the board, and it would cut down on the thinking/analyzing/deciding that each ‘maid would need to do. The only hard part would be finding one single dress that looks nice on all seven ladies.

2) Same fabric, color, and hemline—each ‘maid picks her silhouette and neckline.

Image via Weddingbee Boards / Dresses by Alfred Sung

This way, I’d have a good amount of control in order to achieve the overall look I’m going for, but each ‘maid would have the freedom to find whatever fit is most flattering on her. Love strapless dresses? Fine. Refuse to wear anything besides an A-line skirt? Superb. Do whatever you want, as long as it’s short, purple, and made of the right fabric.

Those are the only two real options I’m toying with as of right now, since I’m frankly not brave enough to say “Any purple dress. Go!” and let everyone have total freedom with the dress selection. But, even though I have the basic set-up limited to these two choices, there are about 40 other decisions that could be made regarding the BM dresses, all of which are causing me to break out in stress hives.

1) Strapless dresses. Definitely the norm in the BM-dress world, but not everyone’s favorite. And, dresses with a more developed neckline often look more “complete” or “tailored,” to me at least. Yay or nay to strapless dresses?

2) One-shoulder dresses. A good mix between strapless and strapped, I suppose, but definitely a trendy look. In 12 months, am I going to look back and hang my head in shame at the already out-of-style BM dresses that appeared in our wedding?

3) Fabric choice. It seems like most BM dresses fall into Camp Chiffon or Camp Satin, with a few stragglers in between. Given that we’re getting married in August, a light, breezy chiffon dress is a decent choice, but would that airy fabric look silly next to my dress?

So, to recap: I have it narrowed down to two scenarios, but a lot of the details are still fuzzy. Combine that with the stated preferences of various ‘maids and mothers, and there are about infinity permutations of BM-dress choices.

Image via Daily Tees

Did your head spin when considering BM dresses? How did you ultimately decide?

Tags: bridesmaid-dress, pittsburgh |

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31 Responses to “Hemlines, Necklines, and Fabrics, Oh My!”

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Member

hesmywatermelon (message) 251 posts, Helper bee

how many bridemaids are you having? Personally I think you need to have 3+ for look 2 or for the look where you say ‘purple, go!’. I think your right about teh one shoulder looking dated, personally, and I dont think chiffon will look silly- go for ‘romantic’ and ’soft’ instead!

4/27/11 @ 8:45 am (reply)

Member

futuremrsbrunell (message) 67 posts, Worker bee

Maybe I’m weird… but this is really the one area I’m least worried about. I picked a color at david’s bridal and said go.. do what you want.. .don’t care. And honeslty, I dont. I trust them to find something htat fits their personalities and figure. Plus I kinda love the look of all of them in something different and uniquely them.

That being said I fall into the neckline sil camp… I just feel like finding a dress that FITS everyone… is just.. too hard. This way you get the control and they get some choices… best of both worlds. Also your girls will look better becauase they will feel better in a dress that is flattering for them.

4/27/11 @ 9:04 am (reply)

Member

Jenbee (message) 610 posts, Busy bee

Im having the same problem, But I do LOVE the alfred sung line, its in expensive and you can find them at many local bridal stores. Im thinking of picking a few out and letting my bridesmaids pick form those, I have 5 bridesmaids… Let me know what you choose!

4/27/11 @ 9:05 am (reply)

Bee

Miss Candy Apple (message) 1,465 posts, Bumble bee

As you know, I had the same issues Looking forward to seeing what you decided to go with!

4/27/11 @ 9:12 am (reply)

Guest

MissLily

I did the fearsome route: I told my girls the length and general color, and said, “Go for it”. I told them I don’t care what shade of purple, or what style, silhouette, or neckline.

Like futuremrsbrunell, I trusted them to find something they love that flatters them. And it ended up just perfect.

One girl is in a one-shoulder Grecian style dress with an empire waistline. Another is wearing a strappy, sweatheart necklined and soft, layered A-line dress with a sequined belt. And my maid of honor is wearing a spaghetti-strapped goddess dress with pale pink accents. All three are in the exact shade of deep purple.

I’m not sure how varied your bridesmaids are figure-wise, but if they are really varied, I’d vote against both strapless and one-strapped. I have an hourglass figure, and I am very uncomfortable without supporting my upper body, especially at an event where there is plenty of dancing. But if all your girls look and feel great in just about everything, I’d say one-strapped. I think one-strapped dresses are something a Greek goddess would wear. Like I said, one of my girls is wearing one, and she looks elegant.

Good luck!

4/27/11 @ 9:16 am (reply)

Member

tntrav44 (message) 1,322 posts, Bumble bee

Ugh. I’m still trying to figure out dresses for the girls. I’m having a hard time finding a line that I like that has multiple options in the same fabric, color, and length, but that’s what I want to go with!

4/27/11 @ 9:22 am (reply)

Member

iHeartCupcakes (message) 228 posts, Helper bee

I have five bridesmaids and went with your #2 option (same color, fabric, length and designer but free to pick neckline & silhouette). I am so happy that I did! Each girl ended up picking a different dress so no two will be alike. I think it will look really cool. Also it illustrated that it was a good decision for me not to mandate a silhouette. If I had, only one of the five girls would have been happy with my choice. As I see it, this way I get the best of both worlds: a cohesive look AND bridesmaids that are comfortable/ happy in their dresses.
I agonized over the bm decision for days but it turned out to be one of the only decisions for our wedding that I have not second guessed.

4/27/11 @ 9:24 am (reply)

Bee

Miss Hyena (message) 1,881 posts, Buzzing bee

Well I wanted mine to all be the same, but right now that’s not working out so great…

4/27/11 @ 9:27 am (reply)

Member

GirlyGirlBead (message) 18 posts, Newbee

I only had 3 bridesmaids and they lived all over the country so we were not able to all go shopping together. We were also all “poor, starving college students” when I got married and I didn’t want to add to my BM’s already expensive trip out for the wedding. So, I just told each of my BM’s to find a short black cocktail dress in a matte fabric and preferably a sleeveless top. That way the dresses all had the same general look, but each girl could find a dress that flattered her the best and was in her price range. Two of my BM’s found their dresses on clearance for under $30! And all three of them looked great together.

4/27/11 @ 9:30 am (reply)

10.

Member

iHeartCupcakes (message) 228 posts, Helper bee

p.s. we went with Bill Levkoff

4/27/11 @ 9:32 am (reply)

11.

Bee

Miss Pony (message) 4,171 posts, Honey bee

I think our BM dress search was too easy and now something terrible is going to happen just to spite me.
@Miss Hyena:

4/27/11 @ 9:36 am (reply)

12.

Bee

Mrs. Meerkat (message) 3,216 posts, Sugar bee

I tried to let me girls pick their own dress (from one designer, in the same material) but they decided they wanted to match. That is how we ended up with custom made dresses.

4/27/11 @ 9:59 am (reply)

13.

Member

toshella (message) 642 posts, Busy bee

I had a hard enough time being the only BM in my sister’s wedding and picking out “any blue dress - Go.” Of course, she was micromanaging my decision… Either way, I don’t want to put the stress on my girls to find a purple dress and having me “approve” the decision (because I know I’ll want to)

I’m planning to go the, “This color, this fabric, this designer” route and let them pick a style they want. Hopefully this appeases everyone!

4/27/11 @ 10:03 am (reply)

14.

Member

MuddyInsignia (message) 48 posts, Newbee

lol, I actually did say “purple dress, go.” But my 3 bridesmaids all wanted to pick something together–so in the end, we selected a dress maker, a length, a color, a material, and let them each choose a style that they liked.

If it helps, we ended up choosing Bill Levkoff Euro Satin in Eggplant–they had the most options that seemed to work with what we wanted and the right color. Good luck!

4/27/11 @ 10:34 am (reply)

15.

Guest

roc

BM dress shopping was really stressful for me as well. I scoured the internet for days, and went to a number of stores to look at and try on dresses myself. I hated satin and taffeta, and chiffon would not have been appropriate for my Oct wedding (I didn’t think). We ended up with a silk faille dress– gorgeous and so much nicer than satin, b/c satin hugs and accentuates imperfections and silk faille lays beautifully. Another great material is silk shantung.

It was also important to me that the dress not “look like a bridesmaid dress” and that each girl could wear them again. I know multiple of my bms have already worn them again in the six months since my wedding, and that makes me really happy!

We ended up with Priscilla of Boston dresses (highly highly recommend them), and there is a discount for quantity. I liked dresses from Lula Kate (where you can vary the neck line and hemline), but they were much more than I wanted my bridesmaids to pay. While I didn’t want to end up with a strapless, I did because the dress was perfect otherwise (and I told them they could sew in the straps that came with the dress). They were short, and the hemline was straight rather than A-line (I think that is the secret if you have girls of all different shapes and sizes…the dress looked as awesome on my size 2 bm as my plus size bm). However, it can be pretty hard to find the straight hems!

Since we ended up with the same dress for everyone, I told them they could pick their jewelry and shoes, and it turned out awesome! I hated the idea of matchy matchy bms, and I loved how each girl got into it and their personality came through in their shoe and jewelery choices. All sorts of people commented on how great it looked together.

PS I went to ND as well, although I’m much older than you! Good luck!

4/27/11 @ 10:39 am (reply)

16.

Bee

Miss Biscuit (message) 624 posts, Busy bee

I knew I needed to stay under $100 so I was going to have to buy from a normal store, not a bridal shop. So…I had to nix different dresses. Everyone says they love the dress though, so they’re either lying to me or actually like it. For $60 I don’t think they can complain :).

4/27/11 @ 10:45 am (reply)

17.

Member

emthegem (message) 22 posts, Newbee

I got color swatches from David’s and then told them to pick a dress, any dress, from anywhere, that came close to that color. My only stipulations was that it was about knee length and tastefully cut. My bridesmaids are all very different sizes–also their budgets are very different. I’m close to all of them, so for the sake of our friendship, I’d rather they all get dresses they love, in a style they feel good in, that fits into their budget, than have everyone identical. I know they will all do a marvelous job. My MOH already has hers and it’s gorgeous–and I can’t wait to see what they all come up with!

4/27/11 @ 10:48 am (reply)

18.

Bee

Miss Tartlet (message) 3,207 posts, Sugar bee

BM dress shopping was fun–but challenging! Does that infinity dress come in a purple color? That way each girl could decide on her own how to wear it, taking the pressure off you.

4/27/11 @ 10:55 am (reply)

19.

Member

vtbride2011 (message) 73 posts, Worker bee

I went the same fabric, length, designer and color and gave my maids free reign on their dress. I have seen most of them in their chosen dress and they all look SOOO fabulous. They also seem so happy that they were able to get a style that suited their figure!

Oh - and I chose WTOO, crinkle chiffon, knee length, in plum. They had about 12 choices (b/c of course all long dresses can be hemmed to the knee!) Can’t wait to see what you choose!

4/27/11 @ 11:12 am (reply)

20.

Member

peazgrl1545 (message) 21 posts, Newbee

The only dress requirement I had was fit… I didn’t want my girls doing the “dress shuffle”. That is, where the girls keep readjusting their dresses over their lady lumps–it’s my pet peeve to see at weddings!

4/27/11 @ 11:22 am (reply)

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