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I’m in registry hell. This is, as Miss Magic would say, a first world problem, and I recognize that. Yet, I am still completely overwhelmed, misinformed of, and pretty much disgusted with the world of bridal registries.
A little background will probably help you understand why I’m having a problem asking people for presents. Can that even happen? Everyone likes to get stuff, right? Well, Sparks and I have lived together for almost two years now, and we have stuff. Lots of it. In fact, every time we go home, our parents try to give us more stuff. And, while we are very grateful for the things we’ve gotten for free, what has resulted is a mismatched bunch things that (to put it bluntly) no one else wanted anymore.
So when we got engaged and had the opportunity to register for some spankin’ new goods, we were excited. Really excited. We marched boldly into Crate & Barrel, requested our magic scanner, and then… stared at each other. The conversation that followed our proud entrance went something like this:
Me: Um, so do you like these beer mugs?
Sparks: I guess. Should we get them?
Me: I dunno… ok, yeah.
Sparks: Do we need anything else?
Me: Probably… Hey, do you want to go to Big Star and come back in a little?
…and we continued in this fashion for about four months. Adding a few things little by little, occasionally engaging in a frantic online registry shopping spree, only to go back and remove everything the next morning. Things were getting a little crazy. Basically, we were completely overwhelmed. And we still are.
I just keep thinking, “Yeah, I want this cassis Le Creuset braiser NOW. But will I want a freaking, purple baking dish in 25 years?!?!” This is just one example of the insanity that has taken over our household. Sparks has (almost) completely removed himself from the registry process. And I can’t say that I blame him. Towels are making me crazy, choosing place settings feels like doing Calculus, and I’m crippled with guilty thoughts of “We don’t really need any of this!”
Braiser/Troublemaker via cookswarehouse.com
So I’m proposing three new types of bridal registries. Types that will: A) NOT make me crazy, and B) benefit me greatly…
1. The Interior Designer Fund
All monetary gifts will go directly to an interior designer who will pick out the perfect registry items, then decorate my home with them. Let them worry about color coordinating, slotted vs. normal serving spoons, and how many sets of sheets I really need. Whew.
2. Frequent Flyer Donations
What’s that? You have TOO MANY frequent flyer miles? Donate them to the newlyweds!
3. Binny’s
In Chicago, we have Binny’s. In other parts of the country, you might have the ABC store, the Package store, Barney’s Beer Mart, etc. The fact that these places do not offer gift registries is mind boggling. As soon as Binny’s DOES start offering this service, I will be registering for the following items, in this order: TEN bottles of 1985 Glenrothes single malt scotch, TWO full size kegs of Gossamer Golden Ale, and SIX cases of the best Rioja that Espana can export. I’ll be waiting, Binny’s. I’ll be waiting.
So who’s with me? If you could register for anything, what would it be?
We haven’t started the adventure that is registering…BUT we are registering for a raft. Yes a whitewater raft. I’d settle for an LQ registry as well 
I’m with you! We’ve been living in sin for years now and while we could use nicer things, we aren’t really in need of anything. Is there a nice way to say, “Give us lots of money, please!”
Sign me up to have an interior designer fund! What a dream that would be.
Yes please! I’ve been wondering why Best Buy doesn’t have a registry! The nerd brides need it!
Also, even if a place DOESN’T have a registry, there’s always amazon.com’s registry - which also allows you to add items from other stores! Really useful!
Lift tickets! Season pass to Beaver Creek? Well, thank you VERY much!
Ditto on the frequent flier miles.
What about a Pimp-My-Ride fund? I know my Jeep could use some door ding assistance!
We registered at Crate & Barrel for mall shoppers, Amazon for online shoppers, and Simple Registry for cash givers. And I gotta say, the gifts I’m most excited about are on Simple Registry - honeymoon flight and activities, couch fund, TV fund, etc. I like the idea of an interior decorator fund!
We also added a lot of gift cards–Home Depot, Trader Joe’s, Sephora–to the Amazon registry.
Sign me up for the beverage registry! What a great idea, FI and I are both beer geeks, I wish this was a real thing!
Wow, I LOVE the frequent flyers idea! Awesome!
My husband is from Taiwan, and as is the case in most Asian cultures, couples receive money from wedding guests (in red envelopes). I had no problem carrying on this tradition!!
Haha, but we also had 3 charities set up in case people didn’t feel comfortable giving us money. The last thing I wanted was stuff, and I think a lot of couples who already live together feel the same way.
ART! One of our goals is to acquire original artwork in our lives but it is expensive and thus a very special occasion (so far, never). I would love to be able to buy a piece and have it be even more special because it is a wedding gift. Hmmm, we should have tried to get a gallery to let us start a makeshift one with them…
Ha, I registered for that braised, in Fennel
I would love a frequent fliers registry. And a registry for beer. Mmm beer.
We were in a very similar area of having everything we needed from hand-me-downs or from our single lives. I dont know if it’ll help you, but we registered for a lot of stuff we already had, but a new, better, or COORDINATING version of it - and then we donated/sold our older/mismatched one when/if we got a new one. Worked for us!
@amberpdidit: What an awesome idea! I would SO register for art if we could
@mdarrah: That’s pretty much what we’re doing at this point. It’s a little less overwhelming to think of it that way!
Check out bottlenotes! You can register for wine, and it was the one thing I could get FH into.
I’ve been dreading the whole registry thing since we got engaged. Neither FH or I can really think of things we need. We don’t live together, but since I’ve lived on my own I’ve acquired a good bit of stuff from my parents and grandparents. While most of it is used it’s still in pretty good condition.We don’t really need dishes or towels. New sheets? Probably. A nice down comforter? Ok. We started making a little list of things that we’d like. A DVD tower to accommodate our ever growing move collection, a stand mixer and a blender for me and books is all we’ve got.
If I could register for anything, I’d probably go with the frequent flier miles. FH and I plan to travel a good bit after we’re married. Or maybe an interior decorator. I’m horrible at decorating. I’ve lived in my house for a year now and it still looks like I just moved in.
I am so with you!! To complicate our problem with registries mr. bohs dad works for a household distributor and if I pick anything kitchen related it results in a bit of tension! I wish teh honeymoon fund was a bit less complicated!!
@LC: That’s so awesome
Sparkler, I completely agree with your registry ideas, traditional registries just don’t do it for me either.
honeymoon registry….any good way of asking for contributions? we have all we need as we just moved in together and he had stuff already anyway. but we have dishes, towels, dish towels, kitchen stuff, pots and pans (my eng. gift from my parents), bathroom rack, furniture (although a new couch would be very nice!!) so i was scoping out a thread and someone suggested and honeymoon registry…. i was excited to hear this idea! we really dont have much even just for the wedding/reception itself. but the only thing is how do you tell people no gifts just cash lol? i figure we can let them know we dont have a registry but would be grateful for any contribution to a honeymoon fund….but is that rude????
I’d register for the “paying off our student loans” fund. With some sort of witty name and it became commonplace for EVERYONE to do that. Please?
we have living together for a while already, and i as a single mom bfore he came to the picture had everything! so when they ask me what would i want, i say, your presence is what i want but if you would to give me something cash is ok as well!
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Mrs. Sparkler, Chicago Age and Occupation: 27, Communications Aficionado Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Publisher Engagement Date: July 21, 2010 Wedding Date: September 2011 Venue: Chicago Illuminating Company About Me: I’m a Southern lady living in the big city of Chicago. Well, lady may be a stretch, but I’m working hard to keep some Virginia charm in our sleek, urban, wedding-palooza! I’m addicted to marathons, not-so-famous bands, Chicago restaurants, and Mark Twain. I cry during SPCA commercials, and I think LOST was the best show to ever hit television. Mr. S and I met at a classy college mixer and, 7 years later, he’s still by my side. He’s the only child, laid back, free spirit... I’m the oldest of five kids, type-A, organizer. It doesn’t work on paper, but we’ve never paid attention to that stuff anyway. Somehow it works. And like they say, sometimes when you know…you just know.
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