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Mrs. Pain au Chocolat, Wilmington, DE Age and Occupation: 29, Realtor Fiance's Age and Occupation: 34, Realtor Engagement Date: November 21, 2009 Wedding Date: June 2011 Venue: Greenville Country Club About Me: An ENFJ with an artistic streak who loves backgammon, sailing, graphic design, and sleeping in. Travel (near or far), good wine, and tasty food makes my heart sing. I'm a compulsive list-maker who lives to plan and organize. Mr. P and I have lived together for 4 years, all the while renovating our city townhome bit by bit. We're planning a whimsical, Anthropologie-inspired garden wedding in June 2011.
About Mrs. Pain au Chocolat

My hair trial was a few weeks ago. Today’s the first chance I’ve had to review the photos of the two styles we tried. Now that I’m looking at the pictures…uhmmm, I’m not really happy with either one. (Caveat: I’m my own worst critic. Throw in some lovely hormones mixed with under 12 days left until W-Day and you get a stomachful of knots.) The good news is I re-looked at my inspiration images and have isolated what needs to change. The bad news is I no longer trust my own opinion so I need to see it on me to know for sure. What I think would look good on me could be a disaster and there’s only the morning of left to figure this out.

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Hair De hair_de Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Hair De01 hair_de01

Both images via Style Me Pretty / Photo by Bliss Wedding Studio

The first hairstyle we tried was the detailed, interwoven updo (above). Because my gown has so much detail already, we downplayed the amount of detail in the hairstyle. The detail is what I liked about those styles.

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Loose B loose_b

It’s a pretty style, but not what I wanted.

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Loose S loose_s

Instead of feeling sophisticated and bridal, I feel like a misplaced nursery rhyme character with a penchant for yodeling and milking cows. Where’s the texture on the top of my head? What’s with the A-shape to the bun area? Where’s the volume from the front? (Oh, there will be no front pic for comparison. I can’t bring myself to post it as this angle bothers me so much.)

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Loose S01 loose_s01

Also on an unrelated but hormonal note, I am still reeling from the amount of grey hair that shows up. I know I have grey hair but I had NO idea it was this pronounced. I feel so old. Sad face.

Problem: Missing definition, the lower half of the updo, texture and volume on the top and front.

Solution: Add height and texture to top and sides to create visual interest. (Smile when having picture taken. Color hair after honeymoon.)

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Hair Si hair_si

Image via Style Me Pretty / Photo by Leila Brewster Photography / Hair by La La Luxe Salon

The second hairstyle we tried was the simple bun. I like this one much better on me.

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Bun Sid bun_sid

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Bun Sid01 bun_sid01

Splitting Hairs, Take 2 :  wedding hair trial wilmington Bun Bac bun_bac

Problem: A little too severe and formal. Bun is too tight. All of this makes me feel old (see “grey hair” above) and matronly. I don’t feel like myself with this style.

Solution: Loosen up bun. Introduce a small amount of texture and volume to crown.

Now I realize how important the wedding day hairstyle is! This hairy beast is not easily tamed. I’m glad I paid extra for a trial (even if the styles need tweaking) because going into the wedding hair-blind is a bad idea. Bad hair, unhappy bride. I have an awful poker face so there would be no hiding it in our photos.

Brides and hair experts: any advice on how to improve these two styles? (Also, am I the only one with virgin hair?)

Tags: hair, trial, wilmington |
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23 Responses to “Splitting Hairs, Take 2”

1 2 

1.
billyburgette
Member
billyburgette (message)  43 posts, Newbee

I think the second hairstyle looks GORGEOUS! And you’re not alone–I was so unhappy with my hair trial that I’m looking for an entirely new stylist. So it could be worse! :-)

Re: the gray, there’s not much of it, but it looks like a quick fix to me. If it bugs you, seems like it would be worth scheduling a color session before the big day. But if you don’t have time/aren’t up for it, don’t worry–you’re beautiful the way you are!

 
2.
ookbob
Member
ookbob (message)  283 posts, Helper bee

They look great! I like the second one better, though. Definitely second the idea of having more volume at your crown. Have you considered extensions or something to add more hair to work with?

 
3.
Kcoleybear
Member
Kcoleybear (message)  683 posts, Busy bee

I love the bun. I didn’t notice gray, but if it’s bothering you I would book a quick coloring with the salon or pick up a box of color.

 
4.
ktisthatbees
Member
ktisthatbees (message)  2,742 posts, Sugar bee

Why don’t you get it colored before the honeymoon and wedding? I got mine colored the week before, extremelly close to my natural color, just with a bit more dimension and had the stylist add a gloss to the color so my hair was super shiny and camaflouged the greys (I have about as much as you).

I like the second style much more on you, but I would have her curl the hair beforehand and leave more face framing pieces loose for texture.

 
5.
MCC919
Member
MCC919 (message)  506 posts, Busy bee

I like both styles from the angles you posted them….! and I really like how your hair is wrapped around the bun in the 2nd one.

I feel your pain about the grays… I’ve also had to deal with this…. since I was 20! Booo… I definitely get my hair dyed regularly, and I had it done 2 weeks before the wedding.

 
6.
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Member
Courtnee (message)  153 posts, Blushing bee

I think they both look really good. I would have your stylist curl your hair to add a bit more texture to the top of your head and loosen the bun or make it bigger. You commented that you were going to color your hair after the honeymoon? I have a ton of grey hair for my age and I’m definately coloring the week before the wedding!

 
7.
xtatic1
Member
xtatic1 (message)  778 posts, Busy bee

Don’t be afraid of hair color! I have had about as much as you (ok, maybe more) since I was in my late teens. And I have super dark hair so it shows up a lot. Now that I am in my 30s I color it myself because of how often I have to do it. Easy peasy. If you don’t want to go the professional route boxed color is pretty good, just use a semi-permanent and it will cover your grays gently.

 
8.
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Bee
Miss Pony (message)  4,171 posts, Honey bee

I really like the second one on you, it really fits with the sophistication of your gown. I also have virgin hair and I’m terrified of hair dye, I’ve found a couple of white hairs and it totally freaks me out, you’re not alone!

 
9.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Pain au Chocolat (message)  1,698 posts, Bumble bee

@billyburgette: That is reassuring. I liked the bun when she did it but now that I’m looking at it with fresh eyes, it felt wrong.
@ookbob: Yes to volume! I have lots of long, thick hair so she has plenty to play with if utilized properly. I will ask her to just use some volumizing products and not to pull it so tightly.
@Kcoleybear: Ok, so consensus seems to be Bun = Good. I’m feeling better, coming back from the ledge now. (My grays drive me so crazy that I pluck them!)
@ktisthatbees: Yes to the curling and making the whole thing a little looser.
If it were my choice, I’d have done a practice color a few months before the wedding. BUT, Mr. PaC said he doesnt want me to “dye (die) before the wedding.” I agree with him. We’re too close to the wedding risk a bad dye job. And I’m one of those girls that visits the salon 3-4 times a year. With color, I’d have to go every 6-8 weeks for touch-ups, right?
@MCC919: Me too! I was born with one gray hair. There’s been a marked increase in the last two years.
@Courtnee: Yep, coloring and cutting. Should make my PWC (post-wedding chop) more interesting.

 
10.
Guest Icon
Guest
Guest

I read about your ‘virgin hair’ and I had to jump in. I also have virgin hair almost the exact same color as yours with plenty of greys mixed in. (I’m 22 fyi, had greys since I was like 14) I’m not afraid of dyeing it, although I never have. I just figured as early as my greys started, I have a long future of expensive dyeing ahead of me so why start now? I have not decided if I will dye or not before the wedding. I really honestly think that a little bit of grey looks nice, I’ve been known to call it hair glitter. Your hair looks great, good luck picking a style and a color!

 
11.
didymoose3
Member
didymoose3 (message)  84 posts, Worker bee

Ugh I feel your gray hair pain! My hair is dark brown and super straight & soft. Since I was 13, I have had these bright white hairs that are super coarse and kink in all directions. It is so embarrassing! I am too afraid to dye it (I was sick and lost a lot of my hair, so now that it is back I don’t want to mess it up) but the white hairs are getting more pronounced now that I’m older - 25 - so I’m going to have to bite the hair dying bullet soon!

 
12.
paw
Member
paw (message)  379 posts, Helper bee

I got married a little over 2 weeks ago, and I have dark brown hair with some gray mixed in. I have those kinky grays that go every direction and gray that blends fine. I did not dye my hair, but there are grays that are noticeable in pictures. I don’t know why, but I don’t mind it. I haven’t bitten the bullet and started dying yet. I know once I start that I can never stop, so I am just holding out.

 
13.
Bee Icon
Bee
Mrs. Earrings (message)  2,477 posts, Buzzing bee

I really like the second hairstyle. My mother found my first grey hair on my wedding day…I think it went grey from all the wedding stress!

 
14.
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Guest
weddingbee lurker

I LOVE the bun. Wouldn’t mind seeing it from the front ;) but the pictures you showed were gorg.

 
15.
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Guest
Ms Bicycle%2BSamurai

I love the second hairstyle too! I’m curious if you tried putting on a top that was more similar to your dress while you had your hair up; sometimes that changes the whole vibe. I know with my wedding jewelry, if I put it on with normal clothing, I feel like a Golden Girl, but bare the shoulders and wrap an ivory silk robe under the arms and va va voom :-)

 
16.
Sunlavender
Member
Sunlavender (message)  553 posts, Busy bee

I almost didn’t think I needed a trial (I’ve been going to my stylist for years). I decided to do a trial, and I’m so glad I did! Although the style was good, there definitely were some tweaks we’ll need ot make on the big day. It also gave my stylist a chance to see the veil and hair flower I’ll be wearing and to try and place those correctly.

 
17.
plantains
Member
plantains (message)  2,433 posts, Buzzing bee

The second one is just so beautiful. Gorgeous and in a strange way reminds me of your wedding inviatations. Architectural yet romantic.

 
18.
Guest Icon
Guest
Joy Cronauer

I love the second one too! This post CRACKED me up….loved how you described your experience!

I feel your pain on the grey’s its tough with dark hair. Right now my secret is a pair of tweezers but thinking that’s not going to last for too much longer. =(

Good Luck!

 
19.
oatmealpie
Member
oatmealpie (message)  152 posts, Blushing bee

Great post! The second style is almost there. One way to youthify (technical term) an updo is to have a tendril or two. They frame the face and make the updo less tight and severe.

And I swear by Tigi’s Headrush Shine Spray (http://www.amazon.com/BedHead-Tigi-Head-Shine-Ounces/dp/B0007CXX50). It counteracts the dullifying effect of hairspray, and I think it helps hide the grays.

 
20.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Snow Cone (message)  1,026 posts, Bumble bee

it looks like, in your inspiration photo, the twisting and curling begins closer to the crown, which adds to the overall volume of the look. maybe that could help achieve a look you’re going for!

 
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Mrs. Pain au Chocolat
Mrs. Pain au Chocolat

Mrs. Pain au Chocolat, Wilmington, DE Age and Occupation: 29, Realtor Fiance's Age and Occupation: 34, Realtor Engagement Date: November 21, 2009 Wedding Date: June 2011 Venue: Greenville Country Club About Me: An ENFJ with an artistic streak who loves backgammon, sailing, graphic design, and sleeping in. Travel (near or far), good wine, and tasty food makes my heart sing. I'm a compulsive list-maker who lives to plan and organize. Mr. P and I have lived together for 4 years, all the while renovating our city townhome bit by bit. We're planning a whimsical, Anthropologie-inspired garden wedding in June 2011.

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