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Like the hilarious Miss Biscuit, what the men wore was of little consequence to me. Mr. Hyena wanted to wear a tuxedo to the wedding, and I agreed that sounded like a good idea (he looks real gooood in a tux). 
So I put him in charge of what he, the dads, and the dudes were going to wear.
This is the look we were going for. I’m not sure if this is actually what Mr. Hyena picked, because I have little to no knowledge on dude-wear, but it looks close to me.
image via Men’s Wearhouse
With a vest and Euro tie (the patterned one) in this color:
image via Men’s Wearhouse
Now, we had planned to just go with a white shirt for under the vest and jacket, and we told our Men’s Wearhouse consultant this. The consultant asked if my dress was white or ivory, and when I said ivory, he told us we should go with an ivory shirt instead because if we went with white, my dress would look dingy beside the groom.
Uh huh…
Left and right shirts, via Men’s Wearhouse
I’m calling B.S. on this one. Yes, for the all of four inches you can see of his shirt under his jacket and vest and tie, I’m sure those minute inches of white fabric are going to making me look dingy.
Luckily, my dress came with this fabric shawl-thingiemabobber that I wasn’t going to use for anything, so I brought it with me down to the store. I held it up to the white shirt—HA, my dress is white! I held it up to the ivory shirt—HA, my dress is ivory! Either one would look fine. You seriously could not tell the color difference next to my (gigantic) fabric swatch.
I get that they want to make sure the groom looks as good as possible on his wedding day. That’s their job, but I think it’s terrible to tell a bride she’s going to look dingy in the dress that she likely obsessed over for months, spent hundreds (if not thousands) of dollars on, and that she was so excited to wear for her friends and family and new husband. Isn’t there a nicer way to convince a bride that an ivory shirt is a better choice for an ivory dress? “An ivory shirt will complement your dress better than a white shirt,” perhaps?
Did you have to deal with the white vs. ivory issue?
OH MY GOD i got in a huge fight with men’s wearhouse over this very issue! They refused to give us white shirts, and told me over and over I would look DIRTY next to a white shirt in my ivory dress.
I finally had to escalate to a manager, and she did give us what we wanted, but we got some serious attitude about it. Maybe it was just our local store, but I will never give them my business again.
OMG we had this issue too at MW! What is the deal!? They almost convinced us we needed ivory, and I refuesed to believe that we did. They gave us tons of attitude - at 2 different stores. We actually ended up getting a free ivory shirt since we bought so many suits (10) so thats fine but DH tried it on and we both agreed instantly it looked worse! Even w/my dress!! Don’t believe it people!
My dress was ivory, and Mr E’s shirt was white…it didnt make any difference at all!
We’re skirting it by putting my FI in a red shirt. Which freaks everyone out. But he’s excited by it, and no one else needs to be.
They told us the exact same thing, it’s like all MW training just drills that point into their heads. We went with ivory, but that’s because I had a fall color scheme with warmer colors, not because they told us it would look dingy.
That IS my issue. My OCD isn’t allowing any wiggle room ether. Thankfully my dress is a little iradesent if you will, and so it looks white next to white and off white next to off white…humph.
He is wearing a white shirt with an ivory vest and tie, while the others guys are wearing white shirts with the blue vests
My dress is diamond white, I wonder which color they are going to suggest for my fiance. Maybe the ivory would make my groom look dingy. They have no tact.
I had a fight with the tux consultants over the white/ivory thing too. Why do they care so much!?? Just let the bride have what she wants. They still get their money either way. And, saying the dress will look dirty or dingy next to a shirt you hardly see is, I agree, a really terrible way to word this. (I heard the same thing!)
I would love to see them try with this me, as my job is designing men’s shirts. Hearing this story over and over really makes me hope that I don’t have to resort to MW….
Even if it didn’t match completely, isn’t it up to the groom to pick the shirt he wants to wear? I can’t believe how many times this has happened to people! Glad you got what you wanted to stood your choice.
funny, i asked the MW salesman’s opinion when we were there buying suits for another occasion. told him my dress was ivory and champagne and he recommended a white shirt for the groom. there are so many different shades of ivory, and of white, that most likely the shirt and the dress wont match exactly anyway. might as well get whatever looks best with the groom’s suit/tux, and in our case we thought white shirts looked nice and crisp.
Ha. My dress was “light ivory.” My husband wore a white shirt, ivory vest, and brown tux. The rest of the GM wore white shirts, brown vests, and brown tuxes. We went to MW, too, but they didn’t give us any issues. Probably because we just confused the crap out of them.
The only ivory shirts they had were this nasty microfiber material so we went with white. DH wore an ivory vest/tie, the GMs wore dray. Looked great, even though my dress was ivory.
Total B.S!!! This should be a PSA for brides everywhere!
I always thought I would be in white, but of course ended up with what I would call a VERY ivory dress. Commence freakout about the boys shirts. I scoured the WB boards and other sites looking up ALL discussions on the white/ivory shirt debate. After a minor meltdown, I decided that white men’s shirts are crisper and would look best, and that my dress was beautiful and could not possibly be overshadowed by a few inches of visible white shirts. The MW people asked what color my dress was and started to give me crap about white shirts making my ivory dress look dirty. My guy watched (usually indecisive) little me in awe while I told them “I have spent more time researching this than you can possibly know. We are doing white”. They shut up and let me have my way.
I WAS RIGHT. Trust me, there may be a marginal color difference in your pics, but if anything it only adds interest to your photos. My dress does NOT look dingy or dirty- it looks fabulous, and the guys look great!
Hi, greetings from bali wedding. I am very impressed and gave me new knowledge. Thanks for the article.
I had heard this issue beforehand and I tend to bend under pressure so I took a determined approach. I used MW’s tux designer on their website, walked to the store sheet in hand and told them that was exactly what I wanted. Granted I agreed to look at the samples to confirm but I had googled fabrics and patterns and they could tell I wasn’t bending.
My dress was gold (think champagne) and ivory and I loved the white with it. I think if I had gone ivory then my dress would have come out looking too yellow in the end where the white tone of his shirt made the pink undertones of my dress more visible.
I sell men’s wear and we dress bridal parties all the time. We ALWAYS tell the groom and guys to get white shirts because the ivory ones end up looking dirty in pictures. There is nothing more classic than a crisp white formal shirt! You made the right decision.
Yes, it IS BS. Nobody will notice, and honestly, I think ivory shirts look dingy. People expect the groom to wear white, and everyone will expect the bride to be wearing ivory/offwhite.
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Mrs. Hyena, College Station, TX Age and Occupation: 23, Marketing Specialist Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Aerospace Engineering Grad Student Engagement Date: January 8, 2010 Wedding Date: May 2011 Venue: Downtown 202 About Me: I'm a Texas girl who met my future hubby in high school, then headed up to Oklahoma for a college education (BOOMER SOONER!) before moving back to the Lone Star State to be with him. I love reading and recycling, Photoshop and reality TV, making lame jokes and then laughing at them, quoting movies, and Mr. Hyena most of all. I'm perpetually early and I like to get things accomplished. When my cat meows at me, I meow back. We're planning a laid-back, unintentionally DIY wedding with a cocktail-party vibe, and can't wait to celebrate our nuptials with our nearest and dearest!
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