Weddingbee Blog

As overwhelmed as I was by needing to pick dresses for some of the gorgeous women in our wedding party, I wasn’t desperate enough to let go of what is perhaps my only abiding principle when it comes to dress shopping. Under *no* circumstance would I pick a dress from a retailer that did not sell plus-sized dresses. Obviously there’s a back story here, and it has nothing to do with our wedding party. Nope—this time, it’s personal. (Doesn’t that sound so dramatic?!)

I’ve only been a bridesmaid once, and this was the dress I was told to buy:

Lorelei from J. Crew

Sounds easy enough, right? Well, as you know I have been a plus-size girl for a long time and moreover, I am particularly well-endowed in the chest area. Can you see where this is going?

Um, yeah. So J. Crew sizes go up to a 16. Now take a look at the side view of the top portion of that dress. Even if I could’ve fit into a size 16 waist, there was never any hope that my busty self could have squeezed into the bodice of that dress. Because I didn’t really have a relationship with the bride, I didn’t feel I could call her and explain the situation. So what could I do? The only real option I saw (besides backing out, and you gotta really make that your last resort) was to buy two dresses and find a seamstress to magically create a whole new dress for me. And that’s exactly what happened, but let me just tell you this… In the end, that one bridesmaid dress cost me almost $600!

Needless to say, it left me with an embarrassingly bad taste in my mouth. So when it came to choosing dresses for my own wedding, I vowed to veer far, far away from designers and manufacturers that offer only limited sizes. That means none of these beauties will ever get to compete for the affection of our wedding party members.

Dress sources from L-R: J. Crew, White House Black Market, Banana Republic, Nordstrom, Bloomingdale’s, Mod Cloth}

I could easily shop plus-size only departments, but that won’t work for all our party members (unless I wanted to retaliate against the universe by forcing our small-framed wedding party folk to cough up the money to pay for expensive alterations as some sort of plus-sized cultural immersion experience— but I’m not *that* evil).

I quickly figured out that taking this stand would likely mean purchasing dresses from a big name bridal retailer, and that was totally fine with me. So we considered David’s Bridal, Alfred Sung, and Alfred Angelo (what’s up with dress designers named Alfred?), all of whom offer sizes up to at least 26 and often 30.

above dresses from David’s Bridal

above dresses from Alfred Sung via Dessy

above dresses from Alfred Angelo

In a world of sheer madness where it’s my job to choose another grown person’s attire, knowing that I practice what I preach gives me just a little bit of much-needed peace.

What are your abiding principles when it comes to your wedding, and what kind of principled choices have you made?