Weddingbee Blog

On top of juggling school, work, and wedding planning, I have added yet another item to my already overflowing list of things to do: lose weight. I am currently 223 pounds. I’m a size 16 (which is down from 245 and a size 18). There, I said it—I’m not ashamed to admit my weight to all of you guys (well, just a little). I have yet to order my dress in hopes of losing weight. However, I have a problem that keeps me from losing it easily. I am a COE. This stands for a compulsive over-eater. More simply put, I am addicted to food and cannot always control what I put into my body. I would binge eat, up to 3,000 calories in a sitting. Then I would feel guilty about eating that way and would consciously be very careful about what I ate, hardly eating anything at all until I would lapse and do it again. This is what caused me to go from being 170 (a size 12) my freshman year of college, to being the size I am now. I gained almost 80 pounds in six years. The cycle was devastating to me. But good news: I have not binged in a year. Which is why I have managed to lose 20 pounds. But I have so much more to go: my ideal weight is 160.

So what am I doing to lose this weight? Well, several things.

The first:

Image via Demonoid.me

I used to drink about three cans a day of Diet Mountain Dew. No joke. I would get migraines if I didn’t drink enough caffeine in a day. I have managed to wean myself off of being dependent on caffeine, but I do still drink quite a bit of non-caffeinated stuff. So my goal is to get all of that junk out of my system and to drink 72 ounces of water a day instead. I will add a little Crystal Lite in there for flavor, but I think it’s really important that I learn how to give my body the fluid that it really wants, not the ones that I think that it wants.

I am also going to rework my diet and eventually get it (over several weeks) to where I am only eating fruits, vegetables, lean meats, and whole grains. I know that I will be more successful if I introduce one thing at a time. It will keep me from failing and going back to old ways. I also know that I will feel so much better about myself once I have cut processed foods out of my diet. I’m positive that my eating habits and weight are what cause the majority of my health problems. If I can eat better, then everything else will get better, too!

And most importantly, I’m going to be doing more of this:

I’ll be working out on the elliptical at least three times a week and also adding a yoga class to help with balance and flexibility.

I’m tired of being a prisoner in my own body, of feeling like I have no control. This is why I joined Overeaters Anonymous online and attend meetings at least once every other day, if not every day. I’ve learned to accept my addiction and to move on from it. Obviously being a COE is a little different from being a drug addict or alcoholic since I cannot abstain from food. It’s more learning how to deal with the feelings that got me to the place I am at and learning that there are ways other than food to deal with them. If a wedding and the thought of a wonderful life with an amazing man is not enough motivation to help keep me straight, I honestly don’t know what is. So here is to starting a new path, and hopefully I’m on my way to feeling better, being leaner, and that beautiful white dress.

Are any of you trying to lose weight? What are you doing to achieve your goals? Are they any setbacks or hurdles like mine that make it harder?