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Weddingbee Blog
Today I’m mixing things up a bit around here, hive. Instead of writing about my latest DIY project or wedding crisis, I’ve invited a very special guest blogger to write today’s post. And who is this guest blogger? Mr. Parasol! You’ve heard so much about Mr. Parasol on here from me that I figure it is time to let him speak for himself. Plus, I appreciate having a day off from blogging. It can be hard work!
Be sure to leave him lots of love! I know you will.
*****
Hi hive!
Mr. Parasol here! I’m really excited (and kind of nervous!) to be writing to all of you today, and I want to share a little about my own experience and perspective on planning a wedding with Miss Parasol (who I’m sure you agree is pretty awesome!).
Most of us guys have no idea how many intricate details go into a wedding, at least not until we start planning one. If you’ve read our proposal story, then you can probably tell that I am the type of guy who likes to have a plan. I guess you could say I have a mind for logistics.
Image via MeeTees T-Shirts
I like devising plans, and I like having all of the pieces fall into place for that perfect moment. However, having put so much thought into how I was going to pop the question, I had neglected to think about the details of the I dos.
The enormity of it all took awhile to set in, and it wasn’t until Miss Parasol and I decided to get married this fall rather than next fall that my mind really started thinking hard about what our wedding would look like. Suddenly the fuzzy image of someday seeing my bride walk down the aisle toward me was replaced by daydreams of seeing Miss Parasol in a beautiful white dress, smiling that amazing smile of hers the first time I see her on our wedding day. With that thought firmly in mind, I jumped feet first into wedding planning.
Those of you who know us well or who have been following Miss Parasol on Weddingbee know that we strongly considered eloping. There is a certain romance to the idea of two lovers running off together. It’s almost like a fairytale, with the added bonus of skipping out on the price tag and stress of planning a wedding. Miss Parasol was the one who really wanted to elope, a fact she fondly reminds me of whenever I complain about wedding planning or we hit some sort of snag. I, on the other hand, wanted to celebrate our marriage with the traditional wedding ceremony and reception.
It’s true: I’m not your average guy. The stereotypical average guy would jump at the chance to elope and skip out on all the wedding planning if his bride-to-be were willing. But I’m not like that. In fact, I was reluctant to let go of the hazy image of what my wedding might be. You might even say that I am a not-so-reluctant groom who is getting married to a somewhat reluctant bride.
I think it comes down to the fact that I am a shout-it-from-the-mountaintops kind of guy.
Image via Under the Radar
I’ve always liked celebrating significant milestones in a big way, whether that means blowing out dozens of candles on a giant birthday cake or tossing a graduation cap into the air. Mix that with my English major’s love of symbolism, and you can say I have a definitive love of pomp and circumstance. Give me music and rituals, ceremonies and celebrations—I love every detail of these rites of passage.
Most people would agree that a wedding is one of the biggest and most significant moments of transition in a person’s life, bigger than any graduation or birthday and, yes, I like all of the celebration and ceremony that surrounds those events. However, just like a birthday and a graduation, when all is said and done, the wedding is just another point of transition, a signpost in the road.
The important part is where the road is going, not the sign itself. Am I excited about our intimate ceremony and smashing reception where we get to celebrate this momentous turning point in our lives? Absolutely! But I am even more excited about starting my life with Miss Parasol, a life that will be full of joy and celebration.
In the meantime, though, I get to roll up my sleeves, put on my thinking cap, and pull my own weight in planning as Miss Parasol and I bring our wedding to life. All I can say is that it will be one heck of a party!
How did your significant other feel about planning a wedding? Was he/she as excited as I am about having a wedding?
My FI is excited and probably has encouraged me more than I would have done on my own to make this a celebration that I want and that reflects who we are. I had guilt about making one day all about us, but he has reassured me so. many. times. that is is ok and normal.
My FI is the same way–I seriously brought up eloping (and my family is 100% into it, to the point where my father has done everything but bribe us to elope).
My FI was like, “No! Must have party!”
I was like, OK, so what, about forty people, in my parents’ backyard?
He was shocked. “No! I have 80 family members in this state alone who we MUST INVITE!”
…there’s been a lot of discussion. And compromise. And me reminding him that he better damn well be an AWESOME lawyer and support me through med school, if I’m going to support him through law school AND pay for his 80 in-state relatives to wine and dine at our wedding.
@kristophine: I think your FI and Mr. Parasol would get along famously! They sound so alike! When I first brought up eloping, Mr. Parasol was like, “But I’ve always wanted to have a wedding!” Trust me to find one of the few guys who didn’t want to elope!
@kristophine: I think your FI and Mr. Parasol would get along famously! They sound so alike! When I first brought up eloping, Mr. Parasol was like, “But I’ve always wanted to have a wedding!” Trust me to find one of the few guys who didn’t want to elope!
I love how supportive and sweet Mr. Parasol is! Having a companion like that makes the planning process even more enjoyable (and sometimes less stressful). 
What a man, Mr Parasol! I love that you are both so passionate about it
thanks for this! It’s refreshing to hear the groom speak about wedding planning! My FI is the same way. He is very excited about planning and is more on the ball than I am! Congrats!
I love that he is so supportive… and head-over-heels in love with you Great post, Mr. P! Nice to meet you!
Mr. Cannon is not really that into planning, but he was pretty big on wanting a real wedding with all of our friends. He had a very cute moment a month or so ago where he came out of nowhere and said, “I really appreciate all the work you’ve been doing on the wedding.” It was just what I needed to hear at that time!
Mr. Parasol - I think it’s awesome that you’re into the planning! Mr. E was good with the DIY projects when I asked for help.
Mr. Parasol, you’re so sweet, it’s so nice to hear a guy’s perspective on planning. Mr. Pony likes planning a lot more now that he’s 14 hours away :), but he still finds ways to help out!
You sound like you’d get along great with my FI. Except he knew EXACTLY what he was getting into with planning a wedding. And he still let me do the planning… go figure 
He helped pick out the gown, the centerpieces, helped me with what parts of the invites worked and didn’t work, encouraged me when I wanted to give up, and gave me a budget. And has made me stick to said budget.
He has also made certain I not only will have an amazing wedding (which, to him, is important for me to have) but also gone above and beyond to make certain we (okay, more me) get a honeymoon.
Mr. Parasol, I agree with other comments. Another man’s perspective is refreshing!
Mr. P is a keeper! My guy also had aspirations for a blow-out wedding, though he had no idea what he was getting himself into in terms of the scope of the planning details and the cost. He did an awesome job with the planning though - crucial b/c our engagement was on the shorter side and we did nearly everything ourselves. I also learned how to delegate
Digging this look into a groom’s brain, especially one with a Weddingbee bride. Having an involved guy makes all the difference in planning and in the big day. Everything is a truer reflection of the two of you.
What a wonderful post Mr. P! My FI needs to take some tips from you! Its been a struggle getting him involved in the planning.
Aww, thanks for the guest post!
My fiance’ is also more “involved” than I am in the wedding planning also. It’s just different personality types. I mean it’s 2011, can we as a society do away with this stereotype that only girls care about their wedding day? It’s both of the couple’s endeavor…
That’s great that your so supportive! My fh is excited and tries his best to help but sometimes he gets lost in the bridal world!
Thanks for sharing your perspective, Mr. P! I really appreciate how supportive you are of our lady Parasol
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Mrs. Parasol, San Ramon, California Age and Occupation: 25, Non-profit writer, editor, and blogger Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Law school student Engagement Date: December 19th, 2010 Wedding Date: September 2011 Venue: Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California) About Me: I am a California girl at heart. I love the outdoors, sunny days at the beach, and hiking in the woods and mountains. I also love good books and am fresh from completing my Master's degree in English and Comparative Literature in New York City. Living in NYC was an amazing experience, and while I'm glad to be back on the West Coast, I'm also thankful that my two years back East gave me an opportunity to explore new places, make new friends, and indulge my passion for Broadway shows. Oh, and I received a pretty awesome proposal from Mr. Parasol in Central Park. Above all else, Mr. Parasol is my biggest cheerleader and my best friend. But even though I'm thrilled to be marrying him, I wasn't always totally on board with this whole wedding thing and at first, I wanted to run off and elope. I've finally been convinced to throw the wedding I never thought I wanted, and so now I'm busy planning an intimate September wedding filled with DIY details. Along the way, I'm slowly learning to appreciate, perhaps even love the wedding planning process.
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