Weddingbee Blog

Today it seems like big wedding parties are all the rage. It’s not uncommon to see six, seven, or even eight (or more!) people standing on each side of the bride and groom, and a lot of wedding parties spill over into double digits.

Image via Jim Kennedy Photographers

This is one wedding trend that Mr. Parasol and I are not conforming to. Perhaps it’s because whenever I see or think of large wedding parties, my mind goes straight to that scene from Steel Magnolias when all the woman are talking about Shelby’s bridal party.

Image via Amazon / Film by Sony Pictures

Truvy: Tell me about the wedding. How many bridesmaids?

Shelby: Nine.

Truvy: Nine? Good Lord!

Shelby: Exactly. Mama made me have my cousins and Margie St. Maurice.

M’Lynn: Shelby, let’s not go into this now. You know there was no way around it.

Shelby: It will be pretentious. Remember what Daddy always says—an ounce of pretension is worth a pound of manure.

I don’t know if I agree with Shelby’s sentiment here, but I certainly agree that when it comes to the Parasol wedding party, less is best. We are no-fuss people, and we love simplicity. And so, in our effort to keep things as simple as possible when it comes to the wedding, Mr. Parasol and I each chose only one person to stand beside us on our wedding day: Sister Parasol as maid of honor and Future Brother-in-Law Parasol as best man.

See? Simple.

While large wedding parties don’t necessarily create more complications for the bride and groom, the possibility is certainly there simply because of the amount of people involved. Every person who’s a part of a wedding brings their own set of opinions and expectations and, when it comes to large wedding parties, that can be a lot for the bride and groom to handle.

For instance, my bridesmaids’-dress-shopping experience with Sister Parasol was pretty straightforward and easy. But I think a lot of that had to do with the fact that I only have one bridesmaid. Let me tell you: Sister Parasol was full of opinions, and she had a lot to say about all of the dresses. But it was manageable because it was just her. I can’t imagine how much more stressful and complicated going shopping with, say, five bridesmaids would have been. I would have been fielding five different sets of opinions, and I just don’t think I could have handled it very graciously. While some people thrive in those situations, I probably would have just curled up in a ball in the corner.

Image via About / Film by Universal Pictures

I’ll also admit it: I’m not very good at micromanagement. When planning a wedding, people tend to have a lot of questions, and many of these have to do with the bride and groom’s own personal expectations and desires for their special day. I’ve gotten questions about people’s attire, whether I’d like some additional wedding-related present that isn’t on our registries, and whether or not family and friends should coordinate their outfits with our wedding colors.

I appreciate that all of these questions come from a good place. Guests are just trying to defer to what Mr. Parasol and I want for our special day, and that’s so wonderful of them. But for someone who’s not really adept at micromanaging things, after about 20 or so of these questions I tend to get a little overwhelmed.

And to be perfectly honest, most of my answers would probably be, “I don’t really care.” I don’t mean that in a mean way; I just mean that I honestly don’t have an opinion. For instance, as far as attire goes, the only thing I really care about is that no one wears white or anything approaching white. For some reason, that really gets to me. But you want to wear a potato sack to our wedding? Go ahead! You know what looks best on your body!

Given my lack of ability when it comes micromanagement and my love of simplicity, I knew that a large wedding party was a no-go for us Parasols. While we have a lot of amazing friends and family members who we would love to have stand up beside us on our wedding day, we prefer the idea of allowing them to simply celebrate with us as honored guests. We won’t butt heads on expectations or opinions, we don’t expect them to give us a huge time commitment, and we want them wear and do whatever they want on our wedding day. Everyone can simply celebrate with us without any of the added stress of being a part of the wedding party and, at the end of the day, that’s what we want our wedding to be: a stress-free celebration!

How big is your wedding party? Can you handle a large wedding party, or did you opt for a small wedding party like Mr. Parasol and me?