Weddingbee Blog

…and I’m not talking about adult-only receptions.

Getting married digs up a lot of questions. You know what I am talking about—when’s the big day? How many guests? When are you having kids? What are your colors?

Yeah. They always sneak that kids one in there, don’t they? Sneaky sneaky.

Though I personally don’t mind the question at all, I do think it’s a bit presumptive and the ensuing answer is often complicated. Assuming we do want children, deciding when we want them is a toughie to answer. I’ve often heard that there is no “right” time to start poppin’ out (or adopting) babies, but I do think there are better times than others.

Mr. Seal and I are (very thankfully) in agreement on the wanting kids front. We both want children. Although he’d be happy waiting a decade to start trying, I’m in a pinch more of a hurry (which I’ll explain in a moment).

We’ve found a happy medium and agree that we will surely wait until we are stable in our careers and savings before attempting to conceive. Sounds fair, eh?

I’ve always known I wanted kids but with the more recent presence of my little niece, I’ve come to realize that I can trust myself as a caregiver. Being among the youngest in my extended family, I didn’t babysit often and therefore a small part of me always doubted whether I could be trusted to hold an infant or safely feed a toddler. With a ton more experience under my belt, I now realize that those old fears were a bit irrational—I’ll surely make mistakes but I will be a good mom.

Anyway, now let me try and explain why I don’t want to wait forever.

Mama Seal had me when she was 36. Has this changed our mother-daughter dynamic any? No. Not in the slightest. In fact, I think I’ve mentioned quite a few times how close we are so my “rush” has nothing to do with feeling “too old” to parent.

Really this has everything to do with grandparents. I want to afford my children the opportunity to really get to know my parents and Mr. Seal’s mama as they are such important figures in our lives. I never got to meet my maternal grandparents, and as I’ve mentioned before, not knowing them has been strange for me—like I missed out on something really important.

The same reasoning holds true for our parents. I want them to be able to watch their grandkids grow up…and waiting ten years would significantly cut that time.

Anyway, I know I’ve tapped into a pretty personal subject, but for those willing to share, I’m interested in your thoughts on children. Are you and your SO planning on raising any kids? If so, have you discussed how long you’d, ideally, like to wait until tossing little ones into the equation?