Weddingbee Blog

Peter Klaven: So what do I do? How do I make friends?

Robbie Klaven: If you see a cool looking guy, strike up a conversation and ask him on a man date.

Peter Klaven: OK.

Robbie Klaven: You know what I mean?

Peter Klaven: No.

Robbie Klaven: Casual lunch or after-work drinks. You’re not taking these boys to see The Devil Wears Prada.

Peter Klaven: Ohhhh god I love that movie. No I won’t.

Image via iloveyouman.com

Much like the main character from I Love You, Man, Mr. Warbler does not have a lot of guy friends. Of course this isn’t the sort of thing that happened because he’s an asshole or anything. Mr. Warbs is one of the nicest, sweetest, and friendliest guys (sure, I’m biased, but he IS!) that I know. Whenever we go out, he always manages to strike up a conversation with strangers and is generally liked by everyone. So, what’s the problem? His work schedule.

Mr. Warbs works at an oil refinery in a water-treatment plant. He works 12-hour shifts both days and nights from 5:00 AM to 5:00 PM or 5:00 PM to 5:00 AM. His schedule rotates every week, sometimes giving him days off during the week, which is nice. But that also means that sometimes he has to work the whole weekend. So when everyone wants to go out on a Saturday night, Mr. Warbs is either working the night shift, or he has to be in bed by 9:00 PM to get up early Sunday morning for the day shift. As you can imagine, this can really put a cramp in your social life.

Another problem is his friends. Everyone has a group of friends that you’ve know since high school. Sometimes you keep in touch for years and sometimes you slowly drift apart. Mr. Warbs and his friends sadly fall into the last category. They’re all in their 30s and are starting families of their own. When they do manage to get away for a Friday or Saturday night, it’s usually on the day that Mr. Warbs can’t go out. His friends (in my opinion) are also major flakes when it comes to making plans, but that’s another story. So what’s my post about? Mr. Warbs’s lack of groomsmen.

Awkward! / Image via iloveyouman.com

My bridal party is up to five people: four bridesmaids and my awesome Man of Honor. Mr. Warbs originally intended to ask his old high school friends, about three or four guys, to be his groomsmen. Well, after being given the run-around and several cancelled events, Mr. Warbs decided to completely count them out. Not just as groomsmen, but as guests. At first I thought that it was just a heat-of-the- moment decision, but now I realize that he needs to stand his ground on this. In a perfect world his oldest friends would stand up there with him, but you can’t have everything. Which leaves Mr. Warbs searching for new candidates.

Man date / Image via iloveyouman.com

Unlike the movie, I don’t want Mr. Warbs to have to go on any awkward man dates. Of course, it would be nice if both of our sides were even for the sake of beautiful photos. But is that more important than only having the people that you care about stand beside you? Seven months ago as a newly engaged bride my answer was, “Umm…yeah!” Thankfully that’s no longer the case. Poor Mr. Warbs has really been stressing about rounding up some groomsmen. So far he’s gotten confirmation from his dad and two cousins. And you know what? If he can’t find any more than that, it’s really fine with me. In the end it’s not about groomsmen or bridesmaids—it’s about us.