Weddingbee Blog

Hi, my name is Miss Dalmatian and I was an impatient girlfriend. I admit I had stacks of bridal magazines long before I had a ring on my finger. I had a folder of wedding inspiration saved on my desktop many months before he popped the question. Heck, I even visited a few venues—it’s not entirely my fault; Mama Dalmatian is an enabler!

Personal Photo of the wedding folder on my desktop

In general, this wasn’t too problematic. We had faced many situations that proved Mr. Dalmatian didn’t scare easily. Like the time he went on my computer and saw I was browsing wedding gowns (and already on page 52). Or the time he was included in a family photograph and my grandmother told him “You’d better come through now, buddy.” If the thought of commitment or the sound of wedding bells scared him, he would have been out the door quite a long time ago!

So when the wedding world began to sweep me away, I didn’t put up too much of a fight…

…OK fine, I didn’t put up any fight…OK fine, I jumped on board like a monkey on a cupcake. After all, the wedding world is FUN! The sparkly rings in store windows are PRETTY! The gowns featured on Say Yes to the Dress are PRETTY! The flowers, and candles, and bows are PRETTY!

Image via Amazon

Most of the time, all of this prettiness helped me justify my premature wedding fascination (OK fine, obsession…a girl can’t get away with anything around here!). I thought that there was no harm, I was just having fun. I told myself that we were going to get married one day, so it was practical of me to be prepared.

But amongst the happiness and prettiness there were a few little nagging feelings that kept poking their nasty heads into my thoughts: impatience and anxiety. I’m not sure exactly how or when it happened, but I went from wanting to be engaged one day when the time was right to wanting to be engaged NOW!

Veruca Salt in Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory / Image via IMDB / Photo by Warner Bros. Ent.

I found myself constantly drowning in a whirlpool of emotions: excitement to get married, anxiety about when he would propose, love for my boyfriend, and guilt for the pressure I knew I was placing on him. All of this at times got overwhelming and led to a few (pre)bridal breakdowns. And let me tell you, if there is one thing I know how to do it is have a breakdown (the fact that Mr. Dalmatian dealt with my hysteria is further evidence that he was here to stay). There was a rational voice in my brain telling me I was lucky to have a man I loved who loved me back and that was all that mattered. Unfortunately, more often than not this voice was drowned out by the aforementioned whirlpool of emotions.

I wish I could tell you that I found a solution to ease the anxiety, but I didn’t. I wish I had a secret for how to turn up the volume on the rational voice and turn down the crazy, but I don’t.

To any other impatient girlfriends out there, and I know you are reading this because I followed wedding blogs long before I was engaged, be comforted by the fact that you are not alone. It’s okay to be impatient, and anxious, and even a little crazy. I know it is hard to hear the rational voice amidst your screaming emotions, but let me try my best to turn up the volume on some of its messages (I certainly don’t know it all, but I do know I wish I had listened to these things when I was an impatient girlfriend):

• Slow down and appreciate all of the little things in your relationship that are making you want to get married in the first place.
• Talk to your hopefully-very-soon-to-be-fiance about what you are feeling—after all, open communication is a good habit to start if you want to marry the man. Tell him the reasons why you can’t wait to get engaged (assuming your desire to declare your love for him is included along with your passion for fondant flowers).
• Don’t be too hard on your significant other. And don’t be to hard on yourself, either. After all, just think how awesome your wedding is going to be thanks to your thorough preparation!

Did you start wedding planning before you were officially engaged? Anyone else ready to confess their anxious girlfriend antics?