Weddingbee Blog

Hi, my name is Miss Dalmatian and I was a sister-of-the-bride. Yes, I realize that is just a statement, but if you keep reading you will see where the confession part comes in.

A little over a year before Mr. Dalmatian popped the question, I was sitting in his dorm room when my phone rang. I saw it was Sister A and figured she was calling just to catch up and chat. WRONG. She was calling to tell me that she was engaged!

The first thought that went through my head: Bahhh! I am so happy for her!

The second thought that went through my head: When are we going dress shopping?

The third thought that went through my head (not so proud of this one): I’m jealous.

I have already confessed to being an impatient girlfriend. Unfortunately, upon hearing my sister’s wonderful news, this not-so-charming quality crept its way into my emotions. Don’t get me wrong; it was not that I was not happy for my sister—I was absolutely ecstatic. It was just that happiness wasn’t the only feeling I was having.

Not helping the jealousy situation - Holy diamond, Batman!

Over the next few weeks, I struggled because not only was I jealous, but I was also plagued with guilt about being jealous. You see, sister A is AMAZING. Literally. She is kind and warm and is the most caring person you can imagine. So what kind of word-that-rhymes-with-witch was I to let my happiness for her be tainted by pangs of jealousy? To top things off, I was trying to hide what I was feeling from Mr. Dalmatian. I have since learned the importance of telling him my feelings unconditionally, but at the time I was trying to avoid making him feel pressured. I also didn’t want to tell my family because I was afraid my jealousy would make them think as poorly of me as I thought of myself. So for a little while, I bottled up my jealously and corresponding guilt and tried my best to only show the happiness.

As time went on, I noticed a change in my emotions (thank goodness). This isn’t to say there weren’t moments when I got distracted. I admit, when we were at the florist my eyes wandered to blooms that I would want in my own wedding. But once things transitioned from the abstract idea of my sister being engaged to more concrete wedding planning, my preoccupation with my own marriage plans faded, and I became fully invested in helping Sister A have her dream wedding. At family get-togethers when I saw her and her fiancé together, I wasn’t concerned with my own engagement status, but rather was filled with excitement to be gaining an awesome brother-in-law (seriously though, he’s awesome).

Then came the wedding day. The one and only thing on my mind was love for my beautiful and glowing sister. Granted, at this point I had a ring on my finger, but I am pretty sure that even if there had been negative thoughts spinning through my head they would have instantly been replaced by happiness the moment I saw my dad walking her down the aisle. The memory of this image still takes my breath away.

Sister A and me getting ready on her wedding day

Sister A - Seriously breathtaking.

Looking back, I am still a little ashamed of the gut reaction I had when I heard her news. I hope with all of my heart that she never felt like I was not entirely happy for her, and that I did not take any joy away from her planning by occasionally getting distracted with my own. Her wedding was exceptionally stunning, and I feel so blessed to have been a part of it.

What thoughts went through your head when your siblings got married? Were you jealous of other couples before you got engaged?

*All photos personal