- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee Blog
This is not the first year that I won’t be home for Thanksgiving. I went to college 2,000 miles away from my family, and I always was too broke to fly home for the holiday. So one year was Thai food in the dorms, another was a takeout meal from Boston Market, a third was turkey sandwiches in Vegas. I stayed in Chicago a couple of years when I either volunteered at or ran in various Turkey Trots.
However, this is the first year that I will away from home for Thanksgiving because I am at someone else’s home. This year, Mr. Mole and I are going to Vegas to celebrate the holiday with his parents.
FMIL and FFIL in Vegas last Christmas
I love my future in-laws. I love spending time with them. I love how they have welcomed me into their house and their family. I love how excited they are to see us this week. Some part of me, though, is still ambivalent that we won’t be seeing my own family — my mom and dad and sister — on Thursday. It’s one thing to be away from home on Thanksgiving and eat pineapple fried rice; somehow it seems like an entirely different thing to be away and still eat turkey and all of the trimmings.
Mr. Mole and I have decided that we are going to alternate the major holidays with our respective families until we have children of our own. This year, his parents get Thanksgiving and my parents get Christmas (a situation made even more complex since my parents are divorced and my father has remarried). Next year, vice versa. It’s the best that we can do, with my family 2,000 miles away and his family 300 miles away.
What are you and your SO doing for the holidays this year? How do you decide how to split your time between both sides?
This year his parents are coming over here for dinner. Last year we did both families and I literally ate 2 bites of food at his parents house because I was too full. Then I took a nap. So were doing a joint Thanksgiving this year which should be…interesting..
We also alternate holidays. This year we will be spending Thanksgiving with my family and we get to spend Christmas Eve through New Years day with his in Pittsburgh. We’ve been trying to alternate holidays for a few years now and it’s worked out pretty well.
We are once again not spending the holiday together. FI & I live about 2 miles from my parents. His parents like about 4 hours away. FI is working Thanksgiving morning & then he is going to fly home. I’m going to be spending the day with my family. FI doesn’t get to see his family as often we see mine so I completely understood that he wanted to go home. It’s just not cost effective for me to go to. Round trip it’s almost $200 in gas plus tolls for me to drive or about $200 to fly - and for a day and a half it’s just not worth it. We’re both going to go down around Christmas time so I’ll see them then.
I just wrote a strikingly similar post and THEN saw that you posted this. Too funny!
Foxy and I are still working out how to do holidays - I haven’t seen my family for Christmas in three years (as we have been with his family), and I definitely miss it. It’s a tricky thing, splitting holidays, but part of me feels like everyone goes through it - even our parents (likely) had to. It takes a lot of compromise, but we’ve been happy with our holidays so far. 
Because the Thanksgiving break is so quick for me, we go to Mr. Mink’s mother’s for this holiday. In December, we go to my parents’ the week before Christmas, then to Mr. Mink’s mother’s for Christmas.
Once in a while, we can make a big trip out of my family’s side of the holidays and we can add on a visit to an aunt and uncle who live in Manhattan.
It’s A LOT of driving…but totally worth it!
We will try doing the Alternate holiday thing as well when we can, but this year is a special holiday. My MAN and I are together, we have been separated for almost 5 months and today we are spending Thanksgiving together.
So today I am Thankful for family, friends, my country, our troops but most of all my wonderful Man who is home with me today.
I hear you! I just realized that this is the third Thanksgiving in a row I haven’t been able to spend with my family. This year, we’re with Mr. P’s dad and stepmom (and his siblings/step-siblings), and the past two years, we were with his aunt and uncle. I have enjoyed these celebrations so much, but I’m determined to spend Thanksgiving with my family next year! It seems only fair. And balancing out who to spend the holidays with is a huge pain, especially when you have to factor in divorced/remarried parents, so I feel you, Miss Mole!
We never miss roasted turkey every Thanksgiving Day. It is the very special day for me where all I can meet most of my relatives. It’s pretty special.
@MsNarwhal: my sister and her husband do the two-in-one-day approach to holiday celebrations as well! I think I would fall into too much of a food coma by the end of the night! I hope your joint celebration was nice!
@Mrs. Ticket: Glad to hear its been working out! We did Xmas separately our first year of dating, so this is only our second year through the cycle!
@Miss Fox: It’s true that it’s so important to compromise. It’s also worked out well travel-wise for us in the past two years: we’ve only had to go a short distance for Thanksgiving, and we’ve saved the long trip for Christmas. That won’t be the case next year, though, unless we move again! (Nooooooooooooo!)
@Miss Mink: Sounds like you guys have a great plan! It’s funny that the drive for a holiday often doesn’t seem that bad. We got stuck in traffic out of LA, so our drive to Vegas took almost 6 hours! Yet it went by so quickly (partially thanks to REM and TMBG singalongs)
@Miss Ke Aloha: How wonderful that you guys could be together this holiday! I hope that you are having a great time.
@Mrs. Parasol: I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving! Now that my sister is married, it is getting even more complicated, since we have to try to coordinate our schedules, along with our parents.
@Tony Hixton: Sounds nice! This Thanksgiving, we celebrated with spring rolls and chicken instead of turkey and stuffing! We might have to eat turkey on Sunday; I’m craving some cranberry sauce!
I am lucky to live 10 minutes away from my future n-laws, but 3 hours (by car) from my parents. I know that’s nothing to complain about (especially compared to your distance), but it’s still hard for me to spend most of the holidays with his family and not mine. My hope is to be able to host both of our parents next year for our first Thanksgiving as a married couple.
This is hopefully the last holiday we have to spend apart. He’ll be home by Christmas, and we are splitting the time between our families! Luckily, our parents are only a few hours apart.
We always spend Thanksgiving with my sister and her kids. They live in the same city as us. We alternate Xmas between my mom and his Mom’s houses.
@TinyTina: Hosting both sides sounds like a great way to celebrate your first Thanksgiving as a married couple. I’d love to be able to do that!
@Future Army Wife: That’s great that he is coming home by Christmas! What a great present.
@Cecilia: That sounds like a good plan. We live in the same city as Mr. Mole’s sister, and it is nice to be so close.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Mrs. Mole, Los Angeles/Las Vegas Age and Occupation: 29, Test Prep Instructor Fiance's Age and Occupation: 31, User Experience Architect Engagement Date: April 2011 Wedding Date: January 2012 Venue: Wynn Las Vegas/Bouchon Bistro About Me: I’m a Wisconsinite-turned-Angeleno who is planning a destination wedding in Las Vegas. I am passionate about education: I spent 23 (!) consecutive years in school, and now I work to help other people get into graduate programs. I love running on the treadmill, buying bath products from Lush, learning new moves in step aerobics, and exploring my neighborhood on foot. I am sometimes snobby about food, but I am rarely snobby about books. I read everything from Geoffrey Chaucer to Iris Murdoch to Chuck Klosterman to Candace Bushnell. My fiance and I are getting married on our third anniversary!
| Sun | Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 29 | 30 | 31 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |
| 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 |
| 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 |
| 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 |
| 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 |
Latest Gallery Pics