Weddingbee Blog

I like to think that I have always played it straight with you, hive. So I’m going to come right out and say it, and I’m going to say it bluntly: I’ve been kind of a bitch lately to Mr. D. Why, you ask? Honestly, there is no real excuse, but if I had to blame it on something other than me, I would say stress. I am so frickin’ stressed out.

I know now that I take on way too much crap, so it’s no wonder I’m so stressed out all the time. I work full-time, I go to school full-time (online, but it’s still hard as hell), and I’m planning a wedding, which because of all the DIY-ness of it, is like another full-time job. Plus I’m the one that my family likes to call when they have issues with each other or other such problems in their lives. Now add to this the fact that I’m just about to finish finals and I’m dealing with my dad dying, I’m a flat out bitch. Big time. Unfortunately, Mr. D has been taking the brunt of my bitchiness lately. This is something I feel absolutely terrible about.

It’s become more and more obvious that I need to find something to do that allows me to target my stress into something important instead of snapping at Mr. D for simply asking a question.

I also need to remember the important thing. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what font the invitations are in, or what color stamp ink I need for the chargers, it matters that I love Mr. D with all of my heart and that I am going to be starting my marriage with him.

So what am I going to do about this bitchiness? Well, I’m going to start a change jar. Every time I snap needlessly at Mr. D I have to put change in the jar. And what is this jar going to do? Why, it’s going towards Mr. D’s trip to the Big Lewboski Festival that is held every year. Those proceeds are for him and him only. I know it sounds kind of stupid, but I’m hoping that the physical action of putting that change in will give me a tangible amount as how much (and how often) I’m a being a bitch towards him. I mean, bless his heart, Mr. D never gets angry at me, but he doesn’t deserve to be my emotional punching bag because I don’t know how to deal with my stress.

Also, I need to find a new hobby that really lets me let out the frustration and helplessness that stress seems to bring with it. Meaning, when I’m starting to get tense and peevish, I will go for a run (which I hate with a passion, thus the junk in the trunk that I have). Now, the running has a double benefit. Not only do I get healthier in the process, I also will be releasing endorphins which will allow me to get rid of some of that stress. It will also allow me to just get into my music and focus on me instead of focusing that anger on someone else.

There isn’t a whole lot that I can do about the stress causers right now. I am about to get a month off of school, which I plan to utilize very carefully. I plan on getting the majority of our wedding projects done during this time, especially because I will also get about two weeks off of work (yay for working in education!). My hope is that once all of that stuff is out of the way, I will be able to focus mostly on work and schoolwork (I”m taking 19 credit hours in the spring), and just let the wedding stuff come as it may. I’m also going to learn how to delegate. I’m totally sending my sister home with some of my tissue paper flower materials so she can take those over. Plus, the wedding stuff will be over in just a little over 100 days, meaning one huge stressor will be gone, and I will graduate in May (two huge stressors gone!).

I’m also going to take the steps to set some ground rules for my family. I know that I’m a great listener and I give great advice, but it’s starting to take a real emotional toll on me and my sanity. I figured out what I should have been telling them all along: If you have a problem, talk to the person, not me. Only come to me as a last resort.

So those have been my ah-ha moments for my stress trifles. What about you? Are you currently stressed out like no other? What are you doing about it?