I never felt old before I started reading wedding message boards and blogs. Age was never really something I thought about all that much. Perhaps it’s because my mother wore her age fairly proudly and never seemed obsessed with looking younger. People always seemed shocked to know her age. Her hair stylist seems convinced that she has a colorist because she’s still a redhead in her late 60s.
Working in academia has probably kept me young at heart. I’m surrounded by the energy and enthusiasm of students in the college bubble. Though I finished graduate school just over a decade ago, people still ask me what year I am as if I’m a student. I haven’t yet considered that a compliment, but I know there’s a time when I will.
Getting engaged at 33 felt just right. I considered myself a city girl before coming to Virginia and city dwellers (especially those in the northern cities) tend to marry a little later than others. I didn’t realize that in the world of wedding blogs and message boards, I’m old.
Early on in my planning, I felt just fine about my age.
Everyone reading and commenting on wedding sites was in same process and I thought that would bind us together. Over time, however, I started to notice the pictures. I saw one stunning bride after another and as I looked at their amazing gowns and jewelry and hair, I also noticed their completely smooth complexions.
Now, I have a great skin, but at 34, I’m not without a line here and there. I started to think that there was no way I would look as beautiful in my wedding pictures. I’ll have the amazing dress and the pretty details, but I fear that I won’t have that youthful beauty that I see when I seek out wedding inspiration.
So what’s a Mink to do? You buy wrinkle cream. I did a bit of research online and decided to start using the Olay Pro-X line and consider seeing a dermatologist to bump up to something stronger about three months before the wedding.
I started drinking more water, assuming that would help, but found articles from NPR and Real Simple that debunk that a bit. I’ll still drink water, but I’m not expecting it to be a fountain of youth.
Lastly, I decided to look through the portfolios of the makeup artists I’ve been considering to see if I can spot some brides who might be around my age. I’ve been looking at blog posts and inspiration shoots, but most of those feature women in their early 20s. I should probably be digging a little deeper. There are plenty of 30-something brides, but we don’t seem as prominent on the wedding blogs.
Mr. Mink thinks I’m being totally silly. He says I don’t need any of this stuff. My reasonable side knows that this is a short-lived feeling. That little voice of self-doubt remains.
Has anyone else felt more aware of their age while wedding planning? How have you dealt with it?
- Charlottesville, Virginia
- College Administrator
- Wedding Date:
- June 2012
- Pippin Hill Farm & Vineyards