Might as well get right to the point!
This weekend, Bossyboots and I had our Pre Cana, which is one of the requirements the Catholic Church places on people who are planning to wed. Our day started off in the usual way (of course!).
Our church’s Pre Cana is held in the rectory, and when we entered, what did my eyes spy but these…
Do these people not realize that there are a herd of brides starving to fit in their dresses coming to Pre Cana?
Apparently, yes they did. And those donut holes were on. purpose.
I ate the daylights out of those donuts. Actually, the whole day was full of unhealthy food…sodas, donuts, coffee, brisket sandwiches. I actually had a sugar headache by the end of the day, but whatever. Worth it.
We enjoyed Pre Cana. Maybe because we live in a major city, our church is much less conservative than some. I’m not naming the church because I don’t want to get them in trouble, but they were very “with it.” By this I mean that they didn’t act like their classroom full of 30-year-olds were all virgins. They didn’t act like birth control is the devil. They treated us like we had brains of our own. Etc and so forth. So I appreciated that. They gave the official Church position, but they didn’t ignore the way that most people live, or that any of it was wrong. They treated us like adults with our own educated opinions, so that was a big A+ from me.
The day was full of interactive exercises, where we discussed solutions for potential relationship challenges with other engaged couples… finances, children, careers, sex, conflict resolution, kindness, etc. I found it incredibly helpful. I also enjoyed our group of people. Everyone was smart, friendly, and took the day seriously while still being fun. By the end of the day, Bossyboots and I were ready to go home (we were both fighting major colds), but we got a lot out of the class. Our instructors were really great, and we learned a lot.
The class finished with a final exercise where we each broke off into corners of the rectory and wrote a love letter to our spouse. We left this letter with the rectory staff, and each letter is mailed on our 1-year wedding anniversary. Is this something that happens in every Pre Cana class? I must admit…I teared up while writing mine. Hopefully, Future Bossyboots likes it when he receives his next year!
Did you write a love letter in your Pre Cana class? Or is that unusual?
We wrote love letters too! But we got to take them home and trade them right away. Which was nice but I love that they mailed you yours!
I’m glad to hear your experience was good, there are suc horror strories surrounding pre-cana.
I might do the mail thing myself, it sounds like a great idea.
We haven’t had ours yet, but I am glad you posted this!! I love the idea of the love letter, I teared up as well : )
I always think pre-cana sounds a little fun. All the stories I’ve heard just seem to remind me of summer camp.
We wrote letter but they we’re in our books so we read them right away and they told us to hang onto them and refer back to them when we hit a trying time or an anniversary. We also had to right a letter to someone who influenced us living or dead. You you choose to have it sent if it was a living person or not send it. Letters to the deceased were burned, I think.
I really loved pre-cana and our church was def ‘with it’ too. I was nervous going into it but was pleasantly surprised by their leniency on some things. It was def one of the highlights from our engagement. we wrote love letters too! but we got to exchange them during pre-cana and they have been sitting in a folder ever since.. since its been almost a year I gotta go dig those puppies out 
We have our pre-cana in April, but I hope we get to write a letter!
Mine starts tonight! I’m hoping it will be good… we had bad experiences with our super conservative priest at the church where we’re getting married, but its small enough that they don’t do pre-cana. We’re doing it in the small city where we live- I hope it goes as well as yours! Although, I just told my fiance who HATES writing that he has to write me a love letter, and he groaned and said his will say “I love you- even though you fart on me at night”. Sigh. I swear he says very nice things to me in person 
I’m so glad you posted this because I had no idea
what to expect!!
Where did you go? I asked my minister officient if he could recommend something like this and he kept saying that he had never been asked that was there something wrong? Made me uneasy…I had heard of and seeking sessions like this.
So good to know! We start pre-cana in about 2 weeks! I am nervous!
Mrs. Snapdragon, Chicago/Dallas Age and Occupation: 32,Associate Producer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Lighting Designer Blogging Since: November 14, 2008 Engagement Date: January 1, 2011 Wedding Date: March 2012 Venue: Marie Gabrielle About Me: Voracious reader of short stories, Russian literature, National Geographic and Cosmo. I'm a GENIUS at spicing up Weight Watchers recipes and a pathological cheater at board games. I run a slow marathon, but my feet are learning to move faster. Mornings aren't my thing, but I can night owl with the best of them. Don't tempt me with your Cherry Cokes---I'm trying to quit. Tomorrow. Or never.
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