I’m pretty good at keeping secrets, but am relieved when I’m let off the hook and can share something that was previously private. I’ve been giddy over the prospect of sharing this news. My sister-in-law is pregnant! She and my brother, who are the reason I have an amazing gaggle of ring bearers, are having their fourth little boy!
Sister Mink was actually a little bit nervous to tell me her great news and explained that many women do not like having pregnant bridesmaids. I must have missed something because I couldn’t figure out why this would be. I know I’ve seen plenty of charming pictures of bridal parties with a baby bump or two.
From Bridal Mussings / Photo by Erin Johnson Photography / Via Lover.ly
So what’s the big deal? I did some Googling and found some places on the web where brides say they want a pregnant bridesmaid to step down! Some seem to think a pregnant bridesmaid diverts attention away from the bride or that a baby bump in a picture isn’t attractive. I could see offering a bridesmaid a way out of the bridal party if her due date coincides with the wedding date, but other than that I don’t see the problem.
I even get a little misty thinking about my future nephew seeing my wedding pictures one day. I hope he loves seeing his mother, happy and pregnant, in them.
So, why do you think brides don’t like having pregnant bridesmaids? How do you feel about them?
My sister and MOH is TTC right now and my wedding is in October. I am excited for her! I really don’t care if she is pregnant in my wedding and agree with you, I don’t see the big deal! Congrats to your SIL!
I can see how it might create a kink if the bridemaids will have matching dresses – it might be hard to predict what size the pregnant ‘maid will need, or might be hard to find matching dresses that include a maternity dress. But it’s a joyous occasion, not something to get stressed over!
Congratulations to your sis in-law and brother. How exciting! I would never ask a pregnant bridesmaid to step down. I might ask them if they’d like to sit down during the ceremony though lol. I love the thought of your future nephew seeing his Mom in your wedding pregnant. So special!
I have a newly pregnant ‘maid too! & am actually counting on at least one other. I think its great 
only downfall in my mind, is no champagne!
I had two VERY pregnant bridesmaids [my sister, and one of my good friends]. I was delighted that they were still up for being in the bridal party.
I second all above. People are crazy. My mom had a friend who didn’t let another friend be in her wedding party because she wasn’t attractive enough. WTF? The point of your bms is to have people you love and who love you be up there supporting you on your big day. Not to appeal to some wack sense of vanity…Congrats to you and your SIL!
I wouldn’t mind at all having a pregnant bridesmaid, I picked those girls for a reason and I’ll take them in whatever form they happen to currently be in. If for some reason she no longer wanted to be in the wedding party I’d be fine with her decision to (though probably a little bumbed). I’d do whatever I reasonably could to accomodate and keep her in the party, like sitting during the ceremony, choosing a dress that will work, etc.
Aw this is really sweet, because you’re right about when your future nephew sees your wedding pics. Every time I see an old picture of my mom while pregnant with me always puts a smile on my face
I think pregnant bridesmaids are not a big deal. I can see where the problem would be because they probably won’t be able to be there for every little thing. But, I think it isn’t a big deal.
I don’t think I would ask this person to step down, but I would offer her if she wanted to, to not worry about it. I’m sure pregnancy brings along its own aches/pains and worries, and if she felt she wasn’t up to the task anymore because of her pregnancy, I wouldn’t want her to feel guilty about it
That’s so exciting! Hopefully the dress will still fit her. That would be my only concern.
I have two preggers in my bridal party 
. One will be 7 1/2 months and we are giving her a seat instead of standing all that time. The other is only a couple months and just starting to show. I told her to pee before the ceremony cuz if she does the potty dance I’ll tease her forever more.
I’m so excited
What exciting news, I don’t understand wanting a pregnant bridesmaid to step down, it’s just more joy to add to the day!
I have heard the horror stories of a bride asking a ‘maid to step down because of being preggers…YIKES!! I had 2 pregnant bridesmaids (one the MOH) and it was just perfect
Pregnancy, hair color, tattoos, weight gain/loss, you name it. All are incredibly selfish, self centered, and stupid reasons to kick someone out (or even complain).
The way I see it, if someone is worried about their pictures that day, or even how the bridal party will look (beyond the dress), they’re completely doing it wrong. When I see a post like that, I usually suggest they fire the bridal party and use mannequins, or models for their bridal party. It’s obvious these ladies care less about friendship, and more about wanting a “perfect little micromanaged Martha wedding”.
I have friends of different cultures, and it can be frowned upon to have a married/pregnant woman in the bridal party….but these are old time traditions that really dont matter to most.
If I was having a bridal party, I completely agree and think its cute!!
If any of my ‘maids are pregnant for the wedding it’s fine by me! Life happens, far beyond the reach of my wedding.
Ha! I’m so glad you posted this! My wedding is in August and I now have 2 pregnant maids! One will be 7.5 months and the other 6 months with twins!! It is very exciting! Unfortunately we had already purchased their dresses so we made a stop this week to see what could be done. The dresses we had would not work with their baby bumps and we only had about 5 other dresses to choose from. I have one other female bm and 2 male bm’s so we went with a dress that is a slightly different style but both have flowers on one shoulder so it will look fine. Luckily we were able to exchange the dresses!! I am leaving it up to the other bm if she wants to switch to the other dress but I am not making her.
I don’t know why brides would be upset about their bm’s being pregnant. They should be the people that you would ask no matter what because they are closest to you. I did talk to both of them and asked them if they were okay with still being in the wedding but I would never kick them out for being pregnant. It is rediculous to expect other people to put their lives on hold for your wedding. As far as the dresses go I just really want them to be comfortable and they will look great no matter what!
You shouldn’t have had to google far- there are plenty of threads here on the ‘Bee that have brides flipping out over a pregnant BM. Good for you for being so reasonable!!
To me, it’s pretty rude to ask a pregnant friend to step down. So she was okay before she was having a baby? The only reason I could think of a prego bridesmaid stepping down is if she wasn’t comfortable (like physically). One of my cousins was her sister’s MOH 8+ months pregnant. She was miserable the whole night. That is a good reason to step aside.
Mrs. Mink, Charlottesville, Virginia Age and Occupation: 34, College Administrator Fiance's Age and Occupation: 40, Craft Beer Consultant Engagement Date: November 26, 2010 Wedding Date: June 2012 Venue: Pippin Hill Farm & Vineyards About Me: I left a pre-war brownstone in Boston six years ago to live in a funky, Southern city where Thomas Jefferson, Dave Matthews, and urban chicken keepers enjoy equal social standing. I still love my Patriots and Red Sox, but have fallen in love with Virginia. I work in education and specialize in integrating technology into my work to improve the student experience. I’m a diehard blogger, animal lover, jamband follower, and DIYer. I paint to relax and have transferred by energy from home projects to wedding projects in recent months. When Mr. Mink and I started talking about marriage, we knew our wedding would be outdoors, that my golden retriever would be part of the day, and that the music would be fantastic. We’ve taken a few risks during our planning process and we’ve been enjoying the process immensely!
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