Post-Wedding Blues

I has ‘em.

It’s hard to describe, really. Maybe it’s more like nostalgia? Bittersweet, even? I can’t quite put my finger on it. All I do know is that I’m a bit more affected by the wedding being over than I thought I would be.

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Photo by Exclamation Imagery

Have you ever had that kind of sentimental feeling after a really great vacation or event in your life? Where things were just so amazing, so wonderful, so beyond anything you could have imagined, that you’re just sad that it’s over? I honestly should have seen this coming…I actually get this way quite frequently. It doesn’t even have to be a big deal or event. Just going to visit family for holidays or spending an exceptionally great day with friends tends to get me very reminiscent, a tad misty eyed, and a bit down that it ever has to come to an end. Is that weird? Maybe. (I mean…yes. I’m an emotional person. Clearly.)


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Photo by the lovely Mrs. Guinea Pig

Here’s the thing: our wedding wasn’t by-the-books perfect, but it was perfect for us. I spent the past two years planning this thing, down to every last little detail. I made almost-daily trips to Michaels. I ordered a crap ton of stuff online and got packages delivered weekly. I amassed a pretty impressive collection of tape, glue, and any other adhesive you could possibly need. I had ribbon by the yards, paint bottles by the dozens, and glitter finding a way onto every surface of our home. I poured my heart and my soul into this wedding, and then…poof. It’s all over. Two years culminated into one exceptional, magical day.

I think I hate that it was just one day (well, two-ish if you count the rehearsal, because that was fantastic too!). No, I’m not saying I wish it was a week-long wedding…I just wish it didn’t go by so quickly. It’s only been three weeks, and I already feel myself forgetting some of the smaller details. Does it even matter? Probably not. But I’m a sucker for this kind of stuff. I love planning. I love doing. Maybe I’m a bit sad because I don’t currently have something concrete to create, plan, do?

Our wedding room has converted back to a normal office again, more or less. It looks so bare in there, with all the wedding-related crafts packed up or thrown away. Some things still linger…I just can’t bear to get rid of them but for the life of me don’t have a clue what to do with them (bubbles, anyone?). I sometimes seriously envy Mrs. Honey and her c’est la vie attitude toward it all.

I’ve also thought about a possible selfish part of the equation. Everyone tells you to enjoy the time you’re engaged—don’t rush it—and for a while, I needed to hear that because I really didn’t want to wait 26 months to get married. But once it got down to around the six-month mark…it all just flew. I appreciated and loved (almost) every second of it…but it’s so hard to really let it all sink in sometimes. That time before the wedding—whether it be a few months or a few years—is the only time (hopefully) that we as brides and as women will ever have that experience. And I absolutely loved being there, full of anticipation, having that attention; it was a really nice time of life. You’re excited, everyone else is excited, you possibly get to be with friends and family a lot more, and even maybe have a party or two. You get to pick new outfits or repurpose old ones, and you have all those excited, giddy, pre-wedding feelings. It’s about you and your partner, your love, your exciting new life together. It’s fun.

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Photo by Exclamation Imagery

Now don’t get me wrong—I am 100, nay, 110% happy with my life and with everything and everyone I am fortunate enough to have in it. Just knowing that Foxy is my husband (I still love saying that!) brings the biggest smile to my face. A wedding is merely a celebration of a marriage, of two people coming together to share their life. It’s also one helluva party. ;)

Lucky for us, our photographer recently sent us a preview gallery with some highlights from the day (see above!), which I have been admittedly going through multiple times daily. We were so blessed to have been able to work with two such amazing photographers on our wedding day, and if the preview is any indication, we’ll have more than enough images to pore over time and time again when we want to relive the magic of that day. Finally having those images will also get my butt in gear to start on the recaps, which I’m so excited to write—both for you and for me—and for us to remember things by however many years down the road! (That is, if I stop showing you all every picture I have, thus rendering recaps completely pointless. Can you tell I’m a bit in love with our photos?!)

How was it for you after the wedding? Did you experience the post-wedding blues in any way?

BLOGGER

Mrs. Fox

Location:
Washington DC/Havre de Grace, MD
Wedding Date:
June 2012
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  1. Member
    katie395 517 posts, Busy bee @ 11:14 am

    Your post made me cry…I am still crying now as I type it because I know I will feel the same way as you. I am one of those people that pours every ounce of everything to make an event, a gift, a holiday party, a birthday card, or whatever it is I am doing. I only have 9 months left before my day and as much as I can’t wait for the big day to arrive, I kind of want it to slow down also. It is a weird kind of feeling but I am glad to see that I am not the only one. Thanks for sharing!

  2. Member
    veggie_rachel 575 posts, Busy bee @ 11:36 am

    Everything looks beautiful and I can tell, even in those two pictures, that you spent spend those engagement years planning your perfect wedding :) I hope you and your new husband soon have many other exciting events to celebrate and plan for!

    PS: I am in love with your husband’s tie. What color is that?!

  3. Member
    Seaside 691 posts, Busy bee @ 11:48 am

    Yes I can identify with this!! Our day was so great that I felt these a lot less than I expected, I mostly just felt warm and fuzzy from it all. I think what I miss is like you said, the planning and having the project to work on. I spent 18 months getting ready for it, and my life changed so much in that period of time that sometimes I feel overwhelmed and nostalgic about it. It was really a great time period. Thanks for your post, looking forward to seeing your pics!

  4. Member
    sunhat 1453 posts, Bumble bee @ 12:05 pm

    I was surprised at the twinge of jealousy I felt when attending the first wedding after mine. I wanted to be back in the bride role, feeling all the love and emotions of the day. The day makes such an impact on you that it is hard to let it go. Completely normal! Love your sneak peak pics!!!

  5. Member
    MrsACarpenter 725 posts, Busy bee @ 12:12 pm

    It’s been just over 6 weeks for me and I totally caught the post-wedding blues. It was very hard about a week after the honeymoon because there wasn’t any anticipation left besides waiting on the professional photos to come back. And I’m still waiting. I’ve tried really hard not to bug our photographer too much, but it’s killing me not seeing them. We had a very small wedding ceremony (25 in all) so there is only 1 photo of the ceremony that we’ve seen.
    I too felt that it all went by a little too quickly. And I’m still holding on to every detail and moment that I can, but its hard.

    So here’s what I’ve decided to create so that we can keep a little piece of our special day in our hearts. I ordered a shadowbox (16 x 20) to put in several keepsakes so we can remember. Here’s what I plan on including:
    - Front and back of our custom invitations (made by me)
    - hubby’s boutonniere
    - Wedding Program
    - Fabric from my wedding gown – pinned to a photo
    - Bridal hanger (Mrs. Carpenter)
    - boarding passes from our honeymoon
    - Use our response cards as the background
    - decorate with ribbons from our wedding gifts
    - Maybe cut-out graphics from our greeting cards and use as accent decor
    Will post photos when I’m done :)

    Additionally, I’ve started a few other projects to hold me over while I dig myself out of this lull, nesting. We already have a house, but now I’m looking at Christmas ornaments to commemorate our wedding & 1st Christmas. I’m also still addicted to my wedding blog and checking in with the bees. It’s nice to help other future “Mrs.” along with fulfilling their dream wedding, like so many others helped me. – Paying it forward!

  6. Member
    mstoadstool 2485 posts, Buzzing bee @ 12:14 pm

    I can’t wait for your recaps, I’m loving your pics.

    I am afraid of (and a bit prepared for) post wedding blues, I know I’ll get it.

  7. Member
    msfairy 976 posts, Busy bee @ 12:18 pm

    I’m afraid I’ll really miss the wedding/planning too! Although I’m very excited that it comes at my favorite time of year – so after the honeymoon I’ll have the fall/Christmas to look forward to. As for January? Well I may be drinking more wine then lol :)

  8. Member
    Mrs. Dragon 813 posts, Busy bee @ 12:20 pm

    Not married yet, but I’m honestly dreading the post-wedding blues. I cherish my vacation time so much that going back to the office with nothing fun to look forward to and winter looming is going to suck. :(

  9. Member
    stephk527 987 posts, Busy bee @ 12:28 pm

    I was just thinking today how sad I’m going to be when this is all over – every day I look forward to accomplishing/doing/reading SOMETHING wedding-related and in less than a year, that will change drastically. Like you, I’m super excited for the event, super excited to call FI my DH, super excited to BE married. . .but I’m a doer and a planner and when all of this is over, I’m going to be done with that. I’m so going to having a serious case of the post-wedding blues. Sending you tons of hugs and imaginable bottles of booze, ’cause there really aren’t cheer-up words for this. <3

  10. Member
    mspony 9265 posts, Buzzing Beekeeper @ 12:47 pm

    I definitely know how you feel, you spend so.much.time preparing for one day and it goes by so quickly. It helps me to have projects lined up to keep me busy, especially since I moved away from my hometown.

  11. Member
    msfox 1635 posts, Bumble bee @ 12:50 pm

    @katie395: Definitely soak it all in!! It’s times like now that I am *so* happy that I am such a pain with toting my camera everywhere and trying to capture almost everything on film.. having those pictures in a huge life saver for me right now: from the shower to the bachelorette to the rehearsal to the wedding!
    @veggie_rachel: Thanks! His tie (as well as the brideslady dresses) are all Oasis by Dessy!
    @Mrs. Sunhat: Oh my gosh, yes.. I’ve already experienced that. A good friend has her shower, bachelorette, and wedding coming up in the next few months, and I’ve felt those odd pangs, too. Didn’t know where they came from. Honestly glad to know it’s not just me!
    @futuremrscarpenter: I *love* that idea of the shadow box, especially everything you’re putting in it!! And I hear you on the nesting thing.. I love opening & using our registry gifts, thinking about how to possibly organize the house a bit more, maybe finally buying a place next year..
    @Miss Toadstool: You might be surprised!! But.. if you do.. you have a friend. :)
    @Miss Fairy: Wine is good for the soul. Trust me, I know.
    @Miss Dragon: Don’t get too bummed yet!!! Everyone’s different, for sure. I’ve had friends who swore they were going to get the blues and they were totally fine.. you never know. Enjoy this time!
    @StephK527: Confession: I still bought this month’s wedding mags.. I can’t let it go, lol!! It’s definitely a whole lot of conflicting feelings and experiences.. but you know what? In an odd way.. this post was a tiny form of “closure” for me, if that makes sense? Le sigh. Wine it is. ;)

  12. Member
    shannonh32 430 posts, Helper bee @ 1:54 pm

    I love your headband! Where did you get that from?

  13. Member
    priyathescientist 1514 posts, Bumble bee @ 2:47 pm

    I definitely think a Four Weddings marathon is in order coupled with snacks and Mr. Fox. Hopefully that will help you live vicariously through other brides enjoying such a special and momentous occasion.

  14. Member
    msfox 1635 posts, Bumble bee @ 3:00 pm

    @shannonh32: RK Bridal – by Erica Koesler :)
    @priyathescientist: Love!! Kind of really excited that it’s new episodes in a week. =D

  15. Member
    mswizard 554 posts, Busy bee @ 7:20 pm

    I don’t have constant post-wedding blues, but I have moments where I just feel so sad (and nostalgic and bittersweet) that it’s all over. It can get a bit overwhelming at times, especially because Mr. Wiz doesn’t really get why I’m so sad about it (“But we’re married! That’s the exciting part!”) so I find myself moping and getting weepy all alone half the time.

    Too bad we don’t live closer to each other, I would so love having a fellow newlywed bride to commiserate and drink away our post-wedding blues, haha!

  16. Member
    archer 551 posts, Busy bee @ 1:04 am

    You described engagement so perfectly- I’m dreading the pwb..

  17. Member
    Rhi 19 posts, Newbee @ 1:04 am

    I am soooo glad I found your post. I was married five weeks ago. Two weeks being back from honeymoon and I just feel so… lost. Like, what do I do with my evenings when I don’t have wedding things to make and organise.

    So me and my husband (I so love saying that) have planned fortnightly date nights, and signed up for French classes. Something new and fun to do together.

  18. Member
    BlingyBride1 108 posts, Blushing bee @ 5:40 am

    I just wrote a blog post on this!! I too got married on June 16th and I am definitely feeling the post wedding blues. It’s so nice to hear that I am not alone in this. I wish I had some advice for you, but I don’t even know what to do with myself lol!

  19. Member
    fungd 15 posts, Newbee @ 8:17 am

    I got married on June 16th and have been trying to settle into being married. My husband moved in and trying to unpack all his belongings. I miss having little projects to do. We started to do something similar to Rhi where we started planning events for our marriage. Taking mini day trips, restaurants we want to try and we have this marriage book someone gave us where we talk about different topics over dinner like what do we hope to do in our first year of marriage or creating a married couple bucket list.

  20. Member
    honey 1684 posts, Bumble bee @ 10:39 am

    I think the way you are feeling is normal! I’m some crazy non-bride mutant :) I 100% expected to feel a void in my life after wedding planning, what is wrong with me!! The only thing I can’t quit wedding wise? Weddingbee. Still addicted to this fabulous site :)

  21. Member
    stephk527 987 posts, Busy bee @ 11:08 am

    @Mrs. Fox, @priyathescientist: NEW FOUR WEDDINGS IN A WEEK?! Excuse me while I SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

  22. Member
    msfox 1635 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:52 am

    @Mrs. Wizard: At least we’ll always have the ‘Bee to commiserate together on! <33
    @Rhi: Isn’t it so much fun to call him your husband?! I love it. And I think that’s a great idea for you guys.. my main issue is that mine and Foxy’s work schedules are *so* out of sync every two weeks.. so there’s a solid few weeks a month that I’m home and he’s working overnights. So far, the couch, TV, & I have become best friends lol!
    @BlingyBride1 & @fungd: Wedding date triplets, huzzah!! I love the idea of a married bucket list, too.. at least stuff to do before kids!
    @Mrs. Honey: Well of course. This site is amazeballs. :)
    @StephK527: I KNOW. July 19. Zomg.

  23. Member
    hanhldao 68 posts, Worker bee @ 3:12 pm

    I definitely have the blues! I’m still “shopping” for dresses and stalking all of the wedding sites! sigh…..

  24. Guest Icon Guest
    Gin, Guest @ 4:55 pm

    I too have the post wedding blues

  25. Guest Icon Guest
    Lola, Guest @ 2:12 am

    I have a serious case of the post wedding blues! We got married two weeks ago today. We also live overseas and have just come back after all the wedding fun – leaving behind our family, friends and my wedding dress! I’m living in a permanent state of ‘This time two weeks ago I was at the hairdressers… Nail technician… Rehearsal… Etc. I want to do it all again!

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