I am the type of girl who lives behind my camera. I am always trying to capture moments of my life on film/video. I feel like if I am not taking pictures, no one will, and the moment will be lost and forgotten. Sometimes I feel like it keeps me from really being present in my life. I’m capturing it, on film, so we can all relive it, but I’m not actually reliving it if I’m living it through photos only.
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How most people see me / Personal photo
As a wedding guest, I’m definitely the person who posts pictures on Facebook the day after the wedding, and you know it never even occurred to me that some people would rather that I not. I’ve actually become a lot more conscious of what I post and who I tag, even more so recently than in the past. Before dating me, Mr. Ly had about 10 pictures of himself on any social media site; now, there are probably hundreds—thanks to me, mostly. Some friends request it—and some depend on it. But at the end of the day, I would like to be fully present at my wedding events—showers, parties, etc.—without worrying about taking pictures.
Another aspect of being present means disconnecting from social media. I’m a total internet junkie, and to be honest I can’t remember what it’s like to not have the internet on my phone, information available at a moment’s notice. As a librarian, I am a full-on early adopter when it comes to new technology. Some people extol the horrors of media and technology as being bad for our society, for our kids, and for social interaction in general. Some people just really don’t like it. I can respect their position, but it’s the way most people share and communicate, and I embrace it. I’m not an over-sharer on Facebook (except maybe with pictures!), I sporadically use Twitter, Instagram, and FourSquare, and I love having the outlet when I want it. I never post something that I think would be questionable if my grandmother read it (my 88-year-old grandmother is an avid Facebook user!) or use it as a sounding board for my problems or personal challenges, and I respect other people’s choice to use the internet how they will. I am not going to object to people posting our pictures after our wedding; in fact, I’m already looking forward to it.
With that being said (and it may seem hypocritical), I am going to request that people BE PRESENT during our ceremony. Some version of this sign (or something like this) will greet our guests as they enter the ceremony:
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Image via Offbeat Bride
However, I know there will be people who will still take pictures and they may even post them on Facebook as soon as they happen, and I’m kind of counting on it. So why have the sign in the first place? I know most people won’t take pictures, but there are a few who may not see the sign, or read it, or care. And I really am OK with that. I want to be present at my wedding, and from the time our pictures start til our very last dance, I will be. (I can’t make any promises for getting ready!) I’d love it if my guests were too, but as someone who knows what it’s like to watch a ceremony through the viewfinder of my camera, I fully understand the other side. I see it as a reminder to people who, like me, can get really caught up in preserving the moment rather than living it.
If I saw this sign at a ceremony, I most definitely would not take pictures, and maybe none of our guests will either. That’s a risk I’m willing to take.
If you were at a wedding and saw a sign like this, would you still take pictures?
Definitely not! I wouldn’t want to make the couple unhappy on their day. It’s up to them- I would just ask that they share the website for the professional photos once they were ready so that I could “relive” the day!
I think this is a good idea! Now I’m considering a sign similar to this lol that’s so true…I love the idea of having our guests “present” at our wedding! Also, I would be so mad if I heard someone’s phone going off in the middle of the ceremony! 
I don’t want my family posting pictures of my wedding on Facebook. I need to give them a copy of this.
We’re also doing this at our ceremony. I want to look out and see the faces of my friends and family — not a sea of camera and cell phone screens! Our officiant will be making a light-hearted announcement before the ceremony begins:
“No screens on the scene, please!”
If I saw this sign, I definitely would not take pictures, it would be disrespectful to the couple and their wishes. I think everyone needs a reminder every once and a while to live in the moment.
I’ve never really thought about the topic that much – I definitely wouldn’t take pictures if someone posted a sign. It’s interesting because you definitely see a lot of guest wedding photos available on facebook almost immediately after the couple are married or having their first dance, etc.
We asked everyone not to photograph during the ceremony as I wanted everyone to be “present” during the ceremony, same as putting away the cell phones. We did have one guest videotape but we put the camera on a tripod to make it easier.
Similiar problem for me is when I go on trips I spent a lot of time trying to find things to remember the trip (gift shops etc) that I forget to actually enjoy the trip in the first place.
I don’t mind people taking pictures but it deeply annoys me having people who can’t take their faces away from their phones, whether it’s a ceremony or a dinner it’s extremely disrespectful.
You already know how I feel about it. 
I would totally respect your sign and not take pictures during the ceremony if that’s what the bride and groom wanted!
I would never take a picture, because I feel like it would be disrespectful if you put up a sign saying not to. If no one takes any pics during the ceremony, you’ll still have the professional pics, so it’s not like you won’t have any. Hopefully people choose to be present during the ceremony.
I also don’t want people to post things on facebook during our wedding day, because I think it’s creepy and weird (and a little rude) to know that those who were not invited are still “sharing” in the day. That being said, I love seeing wedding pics on facebook, even (or especially?) if I wasn’t invited to the actual wedding, so I’m probably biased since I don’t want to give people the same satisfaction of creeping on my wedding pics.
The chances that you will notice what guests are doing, or who has a cell phone or a camera out is slim to none. I know I didn’t. It seems kind of odd to be so offended that people are excited to remember this day you spent so much time planning and making your own. Seems like a nit-picky, first world problem to be honest.
I might be a bit taken back if I walked into a wedding and that sign was posted. Not every one taking pictures is “not present.” I think some my relatives would have been especially offended by the notion that by taking pictures they were not partaking in the spirit of a wedding.
There were great pictures taken by my guests and my photographer that were placed on Facebook, so guests got pictures that the photographer wasn’t in the best location for at the time, etc.
You also have the option to remove your self from Facebook, adjust your privacy settings, or unfriend those you would not like to see your photographs. People act as though FB is some sort of required program that you then have to micro-manage. It isn’t, log on or log off and be happy if the worst thing you need to worry about is shielding the people who you didn’t invite to your wedding from seeing it.
I would definitely respect this sign if I saw it at a wedding! I’m thinking about doing something similar for our ceremony, but I do think it’s important (and another commenter said this) to give guests access to some of the professional pictures you receive – especially family members! Just a thought
I’d respect the sign, too! I’m looking forward to guest photos, though — but I’m hoping our guests strike a balance between documenting the day and actually being a part of it.
If I saw that sign, I don’t think I would take photos, and I’m definitely a photo taker. I think if you do want people to take at least some photos, make ask that they turn their phones off or maybe just put them on airplane mode?
Nope – def would not. It would be clear to me that the bride and groom didn’t want that (or maybe it isn’t allowed by the church or venue).
I feel like it’s also distracting as a guest, to be trying to watch the ceremony and everyone’s holding up a cell phone or a camera. Just enjoy the moment!
I would probably snap one or two just out of a complete physical and mental inability to not take photos at a big event. But I wouldn’t post them on Facebook if I thought that’s what the couple wanted, and I would REALLY try to restrain myself (it would only be 2-3 photos instead of 25). I would also, obviously, turn off flash and any camera sounds because I think it’s rude to interrupt any event with that.
I’m definitely counting on people taking photos at my wedding, and even though a (pro photog) friend is doing our videography, I plan to make sure at least one guest in the audience has a video camera in their hand.
I am gonna give my two cents on the subject. I am sorry but I think that taking loads of photos at the ceremony doesn’t make a person any less present! I am like you, constantly taking photos and there are SOME times where I am more focused on taking photos then being involved in the moment, but the majority of the time I am still very much present! I cannot wait to see my guests photos on Facebook when i am on my honeymoon, it will make me very happy to see reminders of the day before the professional photos are ready.
I agree about mobile phones but with I have never heard a mobile going off in Church and I am sure my wedding won’t be an exception.
I feel like I am ratting on your idea, which i do actually think is really clever, and if I went to a wedding that had a sign like that I would respect the bride and grooms wishes. But at the same time I don’t think its necessary for my guests, but then again everyone is different!
I would respect the couple’s wishes if I saw this sign. But, SO is a big techie. I doubt I could keep him away from his tablet on OUR big day. 
Mrs. Lyre, Philadelphia Age and Occupation: 31, Librarian Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Government Employee Engagement Date: November 11, 2011 Wedding Date: January 2013 Venue: Atrium at the Curtis Center About Me: I’m a book loving, photography obsessed, artsy/crafty bride to be, who was dating all the wrong men, until I met the right one, and where one story ended - our new life together began. He’s a video game loving, quirky t-shirt wearing, movie quoting geek who stole my heart, and welcomed me into his. Together we are a happily co-habitating couple, who live in South Jersey, and are planning a wedding in Philadelphia in January 2013. We love to cook, share a bottle of wine, and watch way too much TV; we laugh all the time, don’t sleep nearly enough, and cannot wait to begin our lives as husband and wife!
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