Weddingbee Blog

I stumbled on this adorable Ogden Nash poem while browsing for ceremony readings:

“I Do, I Will, I Have” – Ogden Nash

How wise I am to have instructed the butler to instruct the first footman

to instruct the second footman to instruct the doorman to order my

carriage;

I am about to volunteer a definition of marriage.

Just as I know that there are two Hagens, Walter and Copen,

I know that marriage is a legal and religious alliance entered into by a

man who can’t sleep with the window shut and a woman who can’t

sleep with the window open.

Moreover, just as I am unsure of the difference between flora and fauna

and flotsam and jetsam,

I am quite sure that marriage is the alliance of two people one of whom

never remembers birthdays and the other never forgetsam,

And he refuses to believe there is a leak in the water pipe or the gas pipe

and she is convinced she is about to asphyxiate or drown,

And she says Quick get up and get my hairbrushes off the windowsill,

it’s raining in, and he replies Oh they’re all right, it’s only raining

straight down.

That is why marriage is so much more interesting than divorce,

Because it’s the only known example of the happy meeting of the

immovable object and the irresistible force.

So I hope husbands and wives will continue to debate and combat over

everything debatable and combatable,

Because I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if

he has income and she is pattable.

Poem found at aenet.com

The “happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force”! I love it. Plus, it’s short and sweet, which is a must. We’ll have to see if it makes the final cut.

How did you find your ceremony readings?