How Wonderful Life Is: S%@# Hits the Fan

Hive, I don’t even know how to tell you about all the ridiculousness that happened the day before our wedding.

Friday morning was calm enough—I filled the cupcakes while Mr. Wiz packed the car. Excitement buzzed in the air as box after box of our months of hard work and planning made its way to be packed for its destined journey.

Batch one of many

All the cupcakes, and our top-tier cake, ready to go

Seeing my wedding dress hanging there on the basement door, ready to go, was so exciting!

At some point, it became clear that not everything was going to fit in our car. Mr. Wiz tried re-packing things every which way, but the fact of the matter was that seven cases of beer, umpteen boxes of decorations, a wedding gown and groom’s suit, two suitcases, over 100 cupcakes, and two people just do not fit in a Honda Civic. We had to call MOH Lefty and Mr. Wiz’s mom in for backup, and after we had packed all three cars to the brim, everyone was behind schedule. By the time we hit the road we were over an hour late. Panic Level: 3.

I had to ride in the backseat to hold up the cupcake stack, and our program basket rode on my lap.

My dad was already at the venue with our rented tableware when we got there. We spent the morning ironing linens and setting the tables, making sure everything was just so. I was grinning at every turn as more and more pieces of my vision came to life! At some point, Wizard Aunt and Cousins T and C arrived and immediately got busy in the kitchen with decorating our cupcakes and our little “top tier” bride & groom cake.

But while some things were coming together, other things were falling apart at the seams. The coordinator we had been working with throughout our year of planning, M, was not there, and would not be there for our wedding. Hive, you can sympathize with me: to have the one person who knows the ins and outs of your planning suddenly not be there for the actual wedding is more than a little unnerving, and the guy we got instead, S, was not even a wedding coordinator. Panic Level: 6.5. He seemed to have no idea of all the details we had gone over with M, and was rude about everything, to boot.

The problems actually started a week before the wedding, when we suddenly found out that our venue didn’t provide water glasses. In our contract it stated that they provided “all glassware,” which one would assume would include water glasses, right? Apparently it only meant wine glasses. And they never thought to specify that. What the heck?? Good thing I asked, and good thing Mr. Wiz’s cousin owns a party rental company, who saved us at the last minute by supplying our water glasses.

On Friday, in their unending quest to deny our guests water, we found out from S that they didn’t provide ice for drinks either, nor did they provide pitchers for water on the guest tables. M had assured us they provided both, so we had bought neither, and had no way of getting them now (our venue is kinda in the middle of nowhere). S also was shocked that we brought bottled beer instead of a keg because, he said, they had no way of chilling or serving bottles ”” contrary to what M had told us. On top of this, our appetizer table was nowhere to be seen, and S said that no one had told him we needed another eight-foot table, and that he didn’t think he had any extras.

We showed him our papers from our final planning meeting with M, which had all of these things outlined, but he kept saying, “M never told you that, because we don’t do that.” Right, because we’re lying about this and I forged her signature? I was beside myself. It was one of those times where someone is being so idiotic and frustrating and you’re so angry that you can’t even think of words. I had to step away and let someone else deal with S, lest I take his head off.

We had no way of contacting M that weekend to get her to set S straight, so even though we knew S was wrong, we had no way of proving it. So we were faced with the prospect of our guests potentially having no water, no ice, room temperature beer (if any at all), and no appetizers—in other words, being forced to be completely inhospitable to our guests—and there was literally nothing we could do about it but wait and see if these things were there at the wedding.

If it had been problems with our decorations or linens or something, fine. I’d have been upset, but no one would have noticed or minded if our linens were a different color or something. But I’m positive our guests would have known, and minded very much, if they had no food during cocktail hour and nothing to drink all night but wine. Panic Level: 9.

Combine all that with the fact that I was running on very little sleep and had to field never-ending questions from nine clueless family members on where to put what, what the centerpieces should look like, if I wanted XYZ to go on the ABC or the 123, and I was run a little ragged. I think this oh-so-flattering picture that MOH Lefty snapped of me sums up how I was feeling by then, red eyes and all:


Miss something? Follow along here!

First, I kick things off with our wedding video.
I go stir-crazy, and almost choke to death, the week before our wedding.


Mrs. Wizard

Wedding Date:
June 2012
DIY Wedding Makeup
Holy Matri-pony: Day After Shoot---Part 1
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  1. Member
    rivendeler 1244 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:26 am

    OMG…………….the amount of stress you lived is unheard of!!!! Hopefully this has a happy ending!!!! Besides being married, of course 😀

  2. mstreasure Member
    mstreasure 1655 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:30 am

    In what world does “all glassware” not include water glasses and pitchers? And they don’t provide ice? Really? I would’ve murdered someone.

  3. Member
    steph01924 308 posts, Helper bee @ 8:31 am

    What a mess! What happened to M that made her leave you with such an incompetent nincompoop? I hope you were discounted her fees or SOMEthing.

  4. Member
    Red Poppy 31 posts, Newbee @ 8:31 am

    Oh man, that is so ridiculous!! I’m hoping everything worked out in the end!

  5. Member
    cdubs2012 51 posts, Worker bee @ 8:33 am

    What the heck happened to the original planner you were working with??? Why couldn’t she be there? OMG you poor thing!!!

  6. bracelet Member
    Mrs. Bracelet 279 posts, Helper bee @ 8:46 am

    *biiiiiig hug*

  7. mswizard Member
    mswizard 554 posts, Busy bee @ 8:53 am

    @Miss Treasure: I know right?! I can’t imagine what would have happened if I hadn’t asked about it at the last minute. I don’t even know what possessed me to ask about it in the first place since I thought it was a given…bridal intuition maybe? :)

    @Steph01924: @cdubs2012: She had a family emergency of sorts — her elderly father lives alone across the country and she went out to see him in early June and told us she “wasn’t coming back until he agreed to come back with her”, so the whole month of June we didn’t know if she’d be back in time for our wedding or not, or what would happen if she wasn’t.

    @Steph01924: She worked at the venue so we didn’t pay any extra fees for her, but I did make it known how unhappy we were with the “substitute” we got. Hopefully I saved any future brides from having to deal with him.

  8. msdragon Member
    Mrs. Dragon 814 posts, Busy bee @ 8:54 am

    Aww man, this sounds awful!

  9. Member
    FluffyFTW 281 posts, Helper bee @ 9:01 am

    Oh no! What a horrible situation for you to be in the day before you get married. :-( I’m so sorry you had that much stress to deal with. I can’t for the life of me understand why vendors want to be argumentative with brides at the last minute. It’s like, come on people, just get it done. Especially when it’s right in the contract!

  10. mspony Member
    mspony 9265 posts, Buzzing Beekeeper @ 9:10 am

    This sounds so frustrating! Obviously, there was nothing your venue could do about your original planner, but they should have secured someone competent to work with you guys!

  11. mswizard Member
    mswizard 554 posts, Busy bee @ 9:14 am

    @Mrs. Pony: Exactly! I couldn’t hold it against her that she had family stuff come up, but jeez, don’t give us some big burly rude guy who has never worked a wedding before.

  12. Member
    thebestisyettocome 57 posts, Worker bee @ 9:17 am

    Oh my! I got stressed out just Reading along, I can only imagine how hard it was in the moment! Hey, but you got a hubby!!

  13. Member
    Irish_in_Oxford 104 posts, Blushing bee @ 9:35 am

    I hope that you wrote a very polite but firm letter outlining all the places where the venue did not meet your expectations, as agreed in your documents signed by M (along with a photocopy of same), and demanded some compensation. What a mess! As you say, you can’t argue with a family emergency, but it is the responsibility of the venue to honour agreements and to provide a competent(!) replacement. What a shame that you had such a stressful day.

  14. sunhat Member
    sunhat 1453 posts, Bumble bee @ 10:02 am

    How stressful! I’m stressed reading this! I hope you demanded some money back – that is just ridiculous. I’m anxious to read what happened next. They needed to follow through on the terms on the signed contract. Not a fun way to start the weekend!

  15. msfox Member
    msfox 1635 posts, Bumble bee @ 10:14 am

    Oh my god. I can’t even. I absolutely would have broken down or yelled to myself in a room or something. I totally understand not having your planned DOC there – same thing happened to us – but I am so, SO sorry that you got stuck with such a freaking idiot. My heart goes out to you, girl!

  16. Member
    bridesmomma 476 posts, Helper bee @ 10:17 am

    I am soooo sorry you had to deal with this!!!! What a nightmare! :-(

  17. Guest Icon Guest
    Future Canadian, Guest @ 10:22 am

    Gah! That wedding planner sub sounds awful. The one person a venue should treat with the upmost respect and compassion is a bride before her wedding day! You deserved so much better.

  18. genie Member
    genie 723 posts, Busy bee @ 10:32 am

    How stressful! I’m so sorry that you had to deal with all of that before your wedding day!

  19. castle Member
    castle 1191 posts, Bumble bee @ 11:49 am

    Oh my goodness how frustrating! I would have wanted to punch that guy in the face. I am so sorry you had to deal with this the day before your wedding!

  20. Guest Icon Guest
    AT, Guest @ 11:52 am

    Oh HELLLLLL no! Your coordinator better have been hospitalized. But even then, she should have detailed charts and timelines and descriptions of what needed to happen when and where so that, in the case of an emergency, someone else could step in and pick things up seamlessly. And to have the substitute try to say no to you for things that have agreed upon in writing is BONKERS! He needs to be in the “we will get it done” mode, rather than being arguable and unhelpful. ugh…I’m so sorry that happened.

  21. Member
    stephk527 987 posts, Busy bee @ 2:00 pm

    Oh Mrs. Wizard, I’m so upset for you. Calling a spade a spade: this is horseshit. Not that it is anyone’s fault but the venue’s, but I am FURIOUS on your behalf. I am so so sorry that this is what you had to deal with, after all of the planning and everything else. How completely inappropriate and unprofessional. My heart also goes out to you.

  22. painauchocolat Member
    painauchocolat 2298 posts, Buzzing bee @ 3:00 pm

    Wow. Just wow. And where the heck was your original planner??

  23. potion Member
    potion 223 posts, Helper bee @ 4:21 pm

    oooooh honey. if this had been me, there would’ve been hell to pay. I’m starting to feel that a little with our venue- we just got our quote and it includes all sorts of little charges we were NOT informed about up front and together they add up to way more than what we budgeted. fun times.

  24. cauldron Member
    cauldron 99 posts, Worker bee @ 5:11 pm

    You are such a trooper, my dear! You eventually made it through, and it all turned out fabulously. Setup, schmetup. :)

  25. coyote Member
    coyote 1960 posts, Buzzing bee @ 6:11 pm

    Arrrrghhhh oh my gosh Wiz, I am angry FOR you. That is just insanity and totally unprofessional. Who doesn’t provide drinking glasses?! Or ICE?! GAH! I totally understand your frustration.

  26. Member
    Ms_Maple 115 posts, Blushing bee @ 7:18 am

    Oh wow. I am stressed out just reading that! I am glad in the end it worked out for you!

  27. Member
    Future Army Wife 2213 posts, Buzzing bee @ 7:42 pm

    We worked with the Events Coordinator at our venue throughout the process. She quit the day before our wedding. Luckily, most of the stuff was pretty standard for their venue, so the Events Director was able to step in. At least y’all got through the drama and are married!

  28. Member
    Imean 230 posts, Helper bee @ 3:01 am

    Wow! I feel so bad for you, you should have been relaxing, not freaking out! I personally think that not only was the replacement you planner left in charge unprofessional, so was she. Ok, she had to leave town…but knowing it was your wedding and she was leaving you with someone inexperienced the least she could do was make herself available on the phone! I agree with the previous poster that mentioned you should write a letter and try to get compensated, or at least an apology!

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