On Changes…

For some lucky couples, getting married means a change in your civil status or maybe your name; I’ve told you that I still live with my parents, which means that for me, marriage will mean moving with Mr. Toadstool for the first time.


245 kilometers or 152 miles away from my current home / From Google Maps

In December I’ll be leaving my childhood home, I’ll be moving away from my family, now knowing that I won’t come back, I’ll be moving away from the city where I grew up in and moving into a bigger, wilder city.


Wilder! / Screenshot via Google Maps, edited by Miss Toadstool

Most important and overwhelming is the fact that I’ll be moving in with Mr. Toadstool. For the very first time in our relationship we’ll be sharing a home, and that scares me a bit.

I love this man to the sun and back and I’m more than ready to spend my life with him, but I know the first couple weeks (or months) will be hard.

Everyone says marriage is difficult, and I know it must be true, but I think what’s particularly difficult is cohabitation, sharing your space with the other, dealing with their everyday flaws. Just picture it—we only see each other on weekends, which means we spend the entire week missing each other and by the time he visits we’re too eager to be together, there’s no time to argue, if we’re mad at the other we can have time to cool off and be calm by the time we see each other again. Our entire relationship dynamic will change when we live together.

One of the first things my dad said to Mr. Toadstool when we told them we’re getting married was: “Are you aware that she has a hard temper?” (Jeez, Dad!) That’s Daddy, trying to give poor Mr. Toadstool a way out, but Mr. Toadstool has a temper too, and hopefully we’ll be able to combine them soon.

Another of my worries concerning the future is getting a job. I’m extremely concerned about moving there and not finding a job soon enough; I don’t want to be a burden to my husband.

I know I’m worrying a lot, and believe me these concerns are nothing when I think about how blissful our life together will be, but I have to think about this stuff and be prepared. Luckily I won’t be alone.

Was or is marriage going to be a big change for you? Was/is it scary for you? How did you handle it?


Mrs. Toadstool

Obregon, Mexico
Wedding Date:
December 2012
Asking My Maids
Showing Some Love to My Shower Hostesses
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  1. funnelcake Member
    funnelcake 1171 posts, Bumble bee @ 2:29 am

    Oh that is a lot! I agree with the others… chores and cleaning are the brunt of a lot of roommate/husband fights. Money can come up too if that is an issue… or jobs, which we’ve fought about too.

    It can be really stressful looking for work, but give yourself time and a chance to find something. Just don’t make it the topic of every conversation. Good luck lady! :)

  2. msfairy Member
    msfairy 976 posts, Busy bee @ 7:36 am

    Those are definitely some big changes coming up, and adjusting to living with anyone takes time (it definitely did for me and the Mr.). But I wouldn’t trade any of it. There will be some amazing times ahead for you and your hubby, and even if you did hit some bumps in the road, those will only strengthen your relationship. Good luck sweetie, and take deep breathes :)

  3. Member
    blonde17jess 1290 posts, Bumble bee @ 9:58 am

    It is definitely tough to get used to, but having the newlywed bliss to offset the (sometimes) aggravating circumstances of cohabitating will be a good thing too. I hope finding a job will not be too difficult for you, but all the adjustments will be made easier by the fact that you’ll have Mr. Toadstool there with you every step of the way!

  4. mspony Member
    mspony 9265 posts, Buzzing Beekeeper @ 11:05 am

    It’s definitely an adjustment, not just living with your spouse, but living away from your family. Luckily, you’ll have a brand new family with Mr. Toadstool :)

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