The Many Shades of Blue

Bridesmaids’ dresses are the total bane of my existence right now.  I guess I’m not sure if I’m going about picking a dress correctly, because I feel like I’m having a way harder time at it than anyone else is.

I’m imagining dresses that are very soft and sweet.


Image via Southern Weddings / Photo by Nathan Westerfield / Bridesmaids’ dresses by Anthropologie


Image via Rock N’ Roll Bride / Photo by Natalie Norton

I’m not really caring too much if they’re identical or just matchy. Shouldn’t that be easy? Half of me is trying to be very nonchalant about it, while the other half of me is about to tear my hair out.

My current problems:

  1. My three bridesmaids are scattered around the world. It’s not like we can all go to a store and pick out one and ta-da done. Trying on dresses would have to be done one at a time, and frankly there are way too many options out there.
  2. The color blue I have in mind is apparently not in style right now. It’s great if I find a cute dress that I like and my girls look good in, but often I’ll look at the swatches, and there really just isn’t a good blue option. What is up with that? I’m aware that they really can’t have every version of blue ever, but I really don’t think I’m being picky.
  3. All of my bridesmaids are different shapes/sizes. I don’t really want to just declare a style without seeing how it looks on them, but at the same time, I’m not sure there’s a style that will make everyone happy.
  4. I really dislike the standard bridesmaids’ dress. I feel like oftentimes, bridesmaids’ dresses have a very distinct style to them—a satin, bright color look that just screams bridesmaids’ dress. This reduces the rewearability of the dress, and at 200–300 dollars a pop (when they already have to fly in), it’s just a little too much.
  5. Too many cooks in the kitchen. I know everyone means well, and everyone has their own tastes, but it really makes it much more difficult to pick something when you know it probably won’t make everyone happy. I’m a people pleaser, especially when I feel weird having complete say in how someone looks at my wedding.

My current top contenders:


Jenny Yoo Keira / Image via Hitched

I really want it in this color:


Jenny Yoo Kenzie in Turkish Blue / Source: Bella Bridesmaid

I like that it’s convertible, so my girls can wear it however they want to on the day, but it’ll still be matchy. Furthermore, it means they should be able to wear it again because they can always just wear it differently. On the other hand, it’s really expensive. When I wouldn’t feel comfortable paying that much for a dress, it’s hard for me to ask my dearest friends to pay that much. I might be willing to split the cost, but still, it’s a lot of money.

The other dress is from ModCloth:


When the Night Comes Dress from ModCloth

I originally bought this dress for a friend’s wedding thinking, oh, I can totally find a better dress than this for my girls. Nope, I totally can’t—not at that price point, at least. It’s gorgeous, it comes in all sizes, it has free shipping both ways. I really want them to try it. If it looks good on them, I think it’ll just be the easiest/cheapest solution.

Picking a dress is seriously stressing me out, and I’m always reminded that even if we settle on a bridesmaids’ dress, there’s still the question of shoes, accessories, hair, and makeup. Aaaah!

Anyone have a really hard time finding bridesmaids’ dresses in the colors they want? Did you feel like bridesmaids’ dress shopping is harder than shopping for your dress? Did you just give up and settle? Has this affected the other colors in your wedding?


Mrs. Panda

Boston, MA
Wedding Date:
June 2013
Things We're Not Doing...but Kinda Want To
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  1. Member
    starrynight 896 posts, Busy bee @ 7:24 am

    My bridesmaids were also scattered throughout the country, so I settled and did DB dresses. They were reasonably priced and I gave them a choice of 5 dresses in one color. They just went and picked the one they liked best, and the choice was off my shoulders.

    I looooove the last dress you posted though, simply gorgeous.

  2. Member
    kbiceling 298 posts, Helper bee @ 7:30 am

    What about something like this?’ defer=’defer

  3. Member
    mgol25 414 posts, Helper bee @ 7:36 am

    I have some of the same problems: my bridesmaids are all different sizes, so I am getting a Two Birds dress: (available in the States as well)

    There are literally hundreds of ways the girls can style them to fit their personality/size, and these dresses are known as “Infinity Dresses.” There are also “knockoff” designers on Etsy who can do virtually any colour you request. Here’s one seller: It might be a good option for you if everyone is scattered around the world, too.

  4. mstreasure Member
    mstreasure 1655 posts, Bumble bee @ 7:37 am

    My girls were across the country, too, so I just picked for them. Honestly, it’s waaay easier, and I don’t think they’ll be upset because it’s kind of expected that the bride will just pick. I love that ModCloth dress! I think it’ll look great on everyone.

  5. Member
    lanalnoco 1436 posts, Bumble bee @ 7:39 am

    I *love* the ModCloth dress! I really think you should consider going with that one… soooo pretty!

    Otherwise, if you can’t find the exact shade you want, would it be possible to order something white and dye it your preferred shade of blue?

  6. Member
    VioletSky 928 posts, Busy bee @ 7:51 am

    omg go with the modcloth dress! It’s sooo pretty, unique, and your BMs are crazy if they don’t love it!

  7. Member
    junesun62 74 posts, Worker bee @ 7:54 am

    Check out Amsale’s chiffon bridesmaid dresses in slate. It’s not exactly what you were looking for but it might be close.
    They come in long and short styles and there are plenty of designs to pick from. My MOH, is having her bridesmaids wear all different styles and colors of the chiffon dresses. I was the only bridesmaid to try on my dress before because I was local. The rest of the BMs are all over the world, so they sent their measurements to the store and the bride picked the dress style for each and placed the order.

  8. otter Member
    otter 1321 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:00 am

    I LOVE the ModCloth option! I hope that it works out for everyone because it is beautiful! Also, I have to agree with Mrs. Treasure and say just pick for everyone. While I let my girls send me options, I ended up shopping with each of them and having final say. (Thankfully no fights or problems, phew!) It was just easier that way! :)

  9. Member
    steph01924 308 posts, Helper bee @ 8:06 am

    Love that last dress!

  10. Member
    VioletSky 928 posts, Busy bee @ 8:08 am

    @kbiceling: love that one too!

  11. gloves Member
    gloves 190 posts, Blushing bee @ 8:10 am

    If it’s free shipping both ways, have each of them order it and send you a pic when they get it. If it looks okay on all of them….go for it!

    For my girls, I also got crazy frustrated. I finally found a dress that none of them objected to, and ordered it in a middle size. I sent it to each of them, had them try it on, and let me know if it was okay. I don’t know if any of them would have chosen that dress as a perfect-dress-they-loved-more-than-any-other, but no one looked bad in it,and no one hated it, so we got it!

    Not to keep rambling, but…I worry that so many brides are concerned about finding a perfect BM dress, and it really just isn’t that important, I don’t think! As long as it looks fine on everyone, no one is really paying that much attention to them anyway, right? Keeping that in mind helped me stress so much less about that particular decision. Ok, I’m done- good luck! :)

  12. castle Member
    castle 1191 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:14 am

    I totally have that dress saved in my modcloth wish list. That’s a great option for a bridesmaids dress!! I, like you, had bridesmaids all over the world. It was so hard to make a decision. Eventually I took a poll between the five ladies and the dress with the most votes won. Thankfully everyone was happy with the choice.

  13. Guest Icon Guest
    denk, Guest @ 8:31 am

    I just tried on the anthro dress that kbiceling posted. While i didn’t love the neckline of the opaque layer so didn’t go for it (very similar to the modcloth dress you posted, so if you liked that neckline you’ll probably likely like this one), it is a GORGEOUS colour (darker teal-ish blue than it looks online) and a very flattering flow-y cut.

  14. Member
    futuremrscpt 955 posts, Busy bee @ 8:32 am

    I hear ya on the blues. I wanted dark blue, not navy. I found “marine” on DB’s website and on my computer it looked perfect. In real life, its navy. So I really kind of ended up settling with ‘royal blue’ or close to DB’s ‘horizon’ which wasn’t my original idea at all. Oh well, I’ll get over it.

  15. Member
    mz2handgrip 119 posts, Blushing bee @ 8:45 am

    I thought bridesmaids dresses were the easiest of all wedding related activities until it came down to it. I originally gave the girls options of finding their own dress as long as it was long, tiffany blue, and chiffon material…but that turned out to be more of a hassle. They were sending me silk ballgown style dresses, etc. lol. And who knew tiffany blue came in so many different shades? Eventually I went shopping for the dress alone, tried on a style I liked, they had a tiffany collection so I can have the exact color I want, and the headache is gone! I might get an ear full when they see the $250 price tag! lol

  16. mstoadstool Member
    mstoadstool 2485 posts, Buzzing bee @ 8:56 am

    I love the second dress. I too have trouble coordinating BMs from all over the country, I just try not to stress about it.

  17. Member
    monh13 154 posts, Blushing bee @ 9:23 am

    I love the modcloth dress! Honestly, I was in the same position as you, and I ended up choosing a dress from modcloth too. I had my maid of honor order it, she got it, loved it and I just told the other girls that it was what we were going with. It is really flattering on everyone and the price was right at $55. I didn’t want anything stereotypically bridesmaid-y and they’ve all said that they can’t wait to wear it again after my wedding. I say, go with modcloth!

  18. Member
    mholden 167 posts, Blushing bee @ 9:26 am

    I LOVE the second dress! It’s on my list of potential reception dresses (only in red).

    Have you considered giving your girls a color and an idea of what you want, and making them look for dresses? They may find something your burnt-out brain skips over or just straight up doesn’t see.

    It wasn’t clear if you’re trying for all the same style or not, but there’s not an easier way to have mismatched dresses than to just let the woman wearing the dress pick it out herself! Plus they can pick their own price points.

  19. panda Member
    Mrs. Panda 1359 posts, Bumble bee @ 10:27 am

    @starrynight: I really wanted to do DB dresses, but I wasn’t a big fan of most of the colors. Furthermore, given the “has straps” requirement, it greatly limited the number of possibilities.

    @kbiceling: @denk: That dress is definitely on my list! I just saw it a couple days ago. I went and try it on. I love it, especially since it has pockets! I think it’s much prettier in person than in that picture. The lace is lovely.

    @VioletSky: I really love the modcloth dress, but some of my bms are worried about the actual length, and one of them called it a old tablecloth =( sadness

    @Miss Gloves: Yeah, I really should learn to just let it go and let it be.

    @mholden: I have thought about doing that, but if I’m really honest, I will say that my tastes are very different than my bms, and I think it would actually make it more difficult (especially for the ones who hate shopping).

  20. Member
    wleighton 8 posts, Newbee @ 11:43 am

    I had this same problem! I just couldn’t find the color in the dresses I liked. Impossible!

    I went through Etsy. I found a designer I really loved who was open to making small changes (straps/no straps, color scheme, detailing, etc) and finding the fabric color and feel I wanted. She send me swatches and now that she knows exactly what I want, its up to my bridesmaids to contact her, send their measurements and pay for their dresses.

    In case anyone was wondering her shop can be found here:

  21. Member
    kbiceling 298 posts, Helper bee @ 12:05 pm

    @Miss Panda: I wore it to a friend’s wedding a couple of weeks ago. It’s REALLY comfortable!

  22. mspony Member
    mspony 9265 posts, Buzzing Beekeeper @ 1:11 pm

    I just picked a dress, knowing from a friend’s nightmarish bridesmaids’ dress shopping experience that it would be easier on everyone :) Plus, I really love the modcloth dress!

  23. dalmatian Member
    dalmatian 592 posts, Busy bee @ 5:08 pm

    I love the Modcloth option! So unique but still classic. I have the dress from the first pic – from anthro from around the holidays last year. The modcloth one seems pretty similar.

  24. potion Member
    potion 223 posts, Helper bee @ 6:49 pm

    Um, can I volunteer to be a bridesmaid in your wedding so I can have an excuse to buy that ModCloth dress? (In case you didn’t know, I’m a little obsessed with that place!)

  25. panda Member
    Mrs. Panda 1359 posts, Bumble bee @ 6:51 pm

    @Miss Potion: seriously, get it. It’s an awesome dress. it may or may not be in my closet as we speak 😉

  26. painauchocolat Member
    painauchocolat 2298 posts, Buzzing bee @ 7:53 pm

    It’s difficult to make everyone happy so try to go with an option that will save you some stress. Are mismatched but similar shade dresses an option?

  27. Member
    ChicagoDreamer 509 posts, Busy bee @ 8:02 pm

    I’m in love with that ModCloth dress! Absolutely to die for!

  28. Member
    jacofblues 1468 posts, Bumble bee @ 12:57 am

    I left bridesmaid dresses quite late so I started to stress! We ended up getting 2 off the rack at a discount price, and one ordered and came well before the wedding also at a discounted price! Don’t worry, you will figure it out!

  29. Member
    WoodenShoes 389 posts, Helper bee @ 3:25 am

    we are going with dresses from they are convertible, but at a fairly reasonable pricetag (you know, as reasonable as BM dresses go.) The great thing is that the dresses don’t need to be altered, which also saves money.

  30. Member
    lovelyduckie 756 posts, Busy bee @ 10:36 am

    I actually purchased a bunch of dresses out of my own pocket, and at least 2 of my bridesmaids will go through them with me next week. We’re seriously considering having everyone in different shades and shapes of teal (maybe even teal lace). For the most part I’ve decided to go down the department store route. If we decide we don’t want the dresses I’ve purchased, but have decided to mismatch, I’ll let them pick out their own dress over the course of the next year.

    Here are the dresses I purchased

  31. panda Member
    Mrs. Panda 1359 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:07 pm

    @Mrs. Pain au Chocolat: I’m having a hard time picking one dress that I like that everyone else seems to, having multiple dresses just seems like a disaster waiting to happen

    @WoodenShoes: I really love the idea of convertible dresses, but I have some friends who don’t think it’s really flattering. I think the straps can sometimes get loose easily and I hate for them to be fidgeting with the dresses constantly

    @lovelyduckie: gosh you’ve found some really gorgeous dresses, hm… I’ve been trying to stay out of the teal range of blue, but you might be convincing me to think about it as a possibility! decisions, decisions…

  32. Member
    Red Poppy 31 posts, Newbee @ 8:12 am

    I love the Jenny Yoo bridesmaid dresses. They can be so versatile and definitely worn again! But I love the lace too… Don’t stress too much about the decision though. As long as the dresses work with your idea of the wedding and are affordable, your bridesmaids will wear whatever makes you happy!

  33. Member
    blonde17jess 1290 posts, Bumble bee @ 12:21 pm

    I am definitely struggling… I have been looking for 6 months and while I know that I’m somewhat picky, I didn’t think I was THAT picky. I’m having a really hard time of it. I like both options, but if you feel better about the Modcloth pricepoint, then go for it! That being said, a convertible dress is probably worth a little extra cash, because they can get a lot of use out of it. And they could always dye it if they wanted to change the color!

  34. panda Member
    Mrs. Panda 1359 posts, Bumble bee @ 12:28 pm

    @Red Poppy: I’m trying not to stress out about it, I feel like it’ll work itself out. I know they’ll look gorgeous either way

    @Blonde17Jess: wow 6 months? I think that’s close to my time frame as well. It has been one of the most difficult decisions for me. I didn’t realize that it seems to be a difficult decision for other people too. I keep thinking I’m not being picky, but maybe I am *shrug* good luck on your search!

  35. Member
    MissSpark 180 posts, Blushing bee @ 9:34 am

    I’m having the worst time trying to find a dress that I like in the shade of blue that I’m looking for…I had no idea that Bridesmaid’s dresses would be the thing I struggled most with! Good luck!

  36. Member
    crisss99 32 posts, Newbee @ 8:33 pm

    I got married last weekend and my girls all wore convertible dresses with no issue – and they run the gamut of sizing/height. We got them on etsy at coralie Beatrix. Really couldn’t beat the $99 pricetag. I know she’s incorporating sheers and lace into some if the dresses now, too. All the girls got tons of compliments, and they loved how comfy they were!

  37. panda Member
    Mrs. Panda 1359 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:40 pm

    @MissSpark: I think picking the shade of blue is the hardest

    @crisss99: those dresses are gorgeous, hm…

  38. Guest Icon Guest
    Giselle Windham, Guest @ 7:22 am

    Im a bridesmaid dress designer. maybe we can help you

  39. Guest Icon Guest
    JLane, Guest @ 4:08 am

    Did you consider little borrowed dress?

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