During my phone chat with our judge/officiant last week, she mentioned the ring ceremony. This came out as odd for me since couples here exchange rings during the religious ceremony instead of the legal one, but anyway.
When I told her we’re not exchanging rings she proceeded to tell me how it “is a symbol” and “is not about the price of the ring, but what it means.” She said she’s performed ceremonies where couples exchange a loop of string or wire. It’s about what it represents.
All this got me thinking if it’s worth to use just anything as stand-ins in order to get a ring ceremony.
Last Saturday was opening day for our local baseball team, and as part of the opening ceremony shenanigans we got light rings and soon started joking that these will be our wedding rings. We took pictures, we laughed, and then the game started.
By the second inning Mr. Toadstool, who’d been playing with my ring, showed me this:
Not happy with that, he kept messing with it and started playing with it.
Meet Jamie: he is now the face of Mr. Toadstool’s Facebook profile.
So that was it for Mr. Toadstool’s wedding ring, clearly he can’t take care of one, and that’s why we’re not having bands.
OK, I’m kidding, but I seriously considered getting stand-in wedding bands just for the sake of the ceremony. Maybe a string ring that we can have as a keepsake (forever stored in a box in the closet) like this:
This one’s actually silver, but play along. /Antonella Giomarelli ring via Lovedazzle
However, what if the ceremony says something like “this [weak, biodegradable, thin material] ring as a symbol of my love.” Not exactly the symbolism I’d like.
Would you get stand-in rings just for the sake of the ceremony? If so, what kind?
The Light Rings were cute… too bad Mr. Toadstool’s didn’t survive. BUT I have to say I do like the “reincarnation” as Jamie. Quite adorable.
I WANT to have a Ring Ceremony at my Wedding, as I love the symbolism.
BUT, Mr TTR has made it clear to me for eons, that he isn’t a jewellery guy (only item he wears is a watch)… no rings, no chains, no earring…
As well, he cannot wear a ring for work reasons, and he says that at his age, with over 60 years of not wearing one… that he just won’t find it comfortable, and will end up in a drawer (or worse lost).
So we have agreed no W-Band for him.
BUT I do like the symbolism of the whole Ring Ceremony for a Wedding, so we’ve come to a compromise.
He will give me a W-Band, and I will give him a W-Watch.
I think a watch is a good stand-in. First off it is also regarded as a classic piece of jewellery, can have a one piece metal band that also represents an unbroken circle, and lastly… marks the passage of time.
I mean what better way to vow “From this day forward… till the end of time ?”
I thought you had an engagement ring, but I had to go back and look to make sure!
If you really don’t want to have them – don’t! I’m sure you could come up with an alternative that would be cheap and easy. Maybe your mothers could make you something. Like… I had this blanket with I was a kid… it’d be easy peasy to braid a “ring” with a few threads from it. Or maybe make them the same – woven together.
My husband never takes his wedding band off, and it was $40 from Amazon.com. I’d probably have gotten him one just for the wedding and to wear on special occasions even if he didn’t. But if it’s no big deal to you, you can find something else.
Mr. D has a cheap ring, relatively speaking — I think it was $99. He was convinced he’d hate wearing it but he feels weird without it now (even though he keeps forgetting it at home). He’s trying to train himself into wearing it full-time!
I do like the idea of rings as symbolism, but I wouldn’t be upset if Mr. D didn’t wear his. They do come pretty cheap, though, if you want to get one.
I’m personally going to do wedding bands BUt also a celtic handtieing it has soo much meaning behind it and you get to keep the mertal whatever youtwo choose to make it out of and make a shadowbook with it and then you can hang it up maybe even add you vows into the box
I would only get stand in rings if they will have meaning for you and Mr. Toadstool. I really think your ceremony should reflect you as a couple, and if the ring ceremony doesn’t fit you, I wouldn’t do it!
My FH’s ring came from Overstock and cost $50. It’s tungsten and he loves it. I got him a tungsten ring for Christmas a couple years ago so when he proposed he moved his ring over as well to get him used to wearing a ring on his left hand. If you’re worried about him losing it you can get a ring for him to use as a stand in for now. Also tungsten is uber sturdy and will not break or be harmed if dropped.
@This Time Round: I just love the wedding watch idea, an Mr. T’s broke recently, however he likes a watch he can shower and sleep withand never (never) take it off, so a fancy watch might not do the charm, he already has one of those he only wears on special ocassions.
@Angelwinged: I love the idea of the handfasting, but that is unknown around here, so Im nervios as for how people will percieve it.
What about borrowing a wedding band from a family member? I like the symbolism of a real band without the expense and the honor of a married person close to you.
I don’t think you necessarily need to exchange rings if you don’t think they’ll symbolize your relationship or just be tossed aside later. Someone else shouldn’t tell you what should be meaningful to you.
I like the watch idea, but really, you could exchange anything meaningful to you. A special edition of a favorite book, something representing the number nine since it’s your 9-year anniversary, or an object with a backstory. Or you could incorporate symbolism into the ceremony without an exchange, like planting a tree that will grow with your love at the end of the ceremony.
Mrs. Toadstool, Obregon, Mexico Age and Occupation: 23, Research Assistant Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Sales Manager Engagement Date: October 1, 2011 Wedding Date: December 2012 Venue: Hacienda los Agaves About Me: I’m a born and bred Mexican girl with a severe coffee addiction, an obsession for books and an aversion for exercise. I like to plan things, so this wedding’s my dream project---I just need to remind myself from time to time that I’m the bride and not just the planner. I recently realized brown’s my favorite color as I was trying to incorporate it in every aspect of our wedding and I'm dreaming of an autumn vibe since we don’t have that around here. I’m marrying my best friend and partner in crime on the day of our nine-year anniversary! He’s an awesome, smart, fun guy who is patient, and crazy enough to spend the rest of his life with me. We’re planning our not-so-dreamy dream wedding in December in a non-traditional way and making it our own.
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