Yes, this post totally deserves all caps.

Here’s a fun question: what do you do when you’re planning a wedding (along with, you know, living a life that involves paying bills, saving for a home and future children, etc.) and you lose your job?

Well, if you’re me—you look something like this…


Image via The Young Female Professional / Except I would be blonde and crying along with that rage face, obviously.

…and then I declared that I was canceling the wedding. (An important note, not canceling the wedding as in not getting married, just making it considerably smaller or getting married at the courthouse instead.) I called my mom to tell her that I was canceling the wedding, and she told me that I wasn’t. I also was double-teamed by Mr. Otter and my momma, telling me not to make any rash decisions so quickly after finding out that I lost my job.

So…that sums up how a not-so-long-ago day of mine went. To clarify what happened: I made the decision to stay in Indiana and not move to where the company is, and for that reason, my former job is no longer mine. It (thankfully) was not an issue of my work ethic, but rather that a company culture was being built, and I wasn’t there to be a part of it.

Now that I’ve had the time to think things over and clear my mind, it has really given me some great perspective in that I’m so incredibly fortunate to be having a wedding at all! A wedding, while often accompanied by a party, is more importantly about the marriage. Losing my job has been a setback financially, but it doesn’t change that I have a wonderful man in my life that will soon be my husband. So while I’m fortunate for the celebration of the wedding, I’m even more fortunate for the marriage to Mr. Otter. :)

Did you go through a tough time financially while you were planning your own wedding? Tell me about it—and how you stayed sane. I could definitely use the advice!


Mrs. Otter

Indianapolis, IN
Wedding Date:
April 2013
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  1. Member
    notbridey 770 posts, Busy bee @ 1:41 pm

    I’ve been temping since we moved to CO while going back to school for nursing. Well after being engaged for two months the best temp gig ever ended. No more money in the budget for me. Since then the gigs have been few and far between. To stay sane I’ve been on Pinterest looking for yummy and healthy meals for the FI and I. Making grocery lists and week long meal plans has been more fun than I thought…clearly I’m losing it. I’ve also been trail running quite a few times and do core work by myself in the living room. Proud to say that I am officially down 3.6lbs and my legs are looking super toned from the running.

    Here’s hoping for a job though. I’d like to be able to contribute to the household financially.

  2. Member
    mrsjjc 246 posts, Helper bee @ 1:47 pm

    My husband lost his job just a few months after we got engaged. To give you some perspective, I work for a non-profit, and he’s an engineer. Um, yeah… it totally sucked.

    We had already committed to a date, venue, dress, and photographer… so we created a super strict budget and committed to saving as much as possible. He got a job four months later, and we were able to be debt-free by the wedding. But holy shit, it was stressful!!

  3. Member
    EncaPetro 3 posts, Wannabee @ 1:50 pm

    My fiance and I going through a move right now, that happened very suddenly. The whole thing is forcing us to dip into money we’ve put aside for the wedding and our rent will cost more. We’ve come up with an adjusted budget that also includes pinterest meals and groupon for nights out. I’m diving into pinterest more for diy wedding ideas and am making as many things as I can, it’s actually kind of fun. I know this isn’t the same as loosing a sorce of income but hopefully these ideas help. Best of luck on the new job hunt!

  4. Member
    lulu_honey 1444 posts, Bumble bee @ 1:54 pm

    LOL, I had to comment just because that picture is amazong.

  5. Member
    lulu_honey 1444 posts, Bumble bee @ 1:54 pm

    *amazing ;)

  6. Member
    nativedesires 3986 posts, Honey bee @ 1:58 pm

    I was laid off in the middle of wedding planning and my face looked like that too. It created a lot of additional stress financially as I could no longer afford to do the things I had wanted. we were already planning a smaller wedding to begin with, on top of that the year end bonus my partner was
    Expecting to receive ended up being only 1/4 of what we
    Had planned for. We had to cut a lot of things and become dependent on family and friends to assist in many areas.

  7. Member
    bretonvirgniia 1656 posts, Bumble bee @ 1:58 pm

    If it makes you feel better…my FI and I were just in Europe last week and missed our flights home due to a car rental fuck up.

    Which meant that we spent out entire 2k savings that we had for the wedding to get home :(

    I am currently behind two months of wedding savings…which isn’t exactly the same boat but it f’n sucks when you have a budget and you get set back!!

    I’m sure you’ll find a job and everything is going to work out!!

  8. Member
    mrs_brownie 831 posts, Busy bee @ 2:20 pm

    i got laid-off two months after we got enagaged. luckily we didn’t have too much planned yet, so we knew the kind of budget we would be working with. it still has been very, very stressful and we have had to cut back on a lot. definitely have had that face many times!

  9. Member
    nates0301 140 posts, Blushing bee @ 3:15 pm

    Omg I totally know how you feel my fiance and I are both unemployed and we were supposed to get married this Saturday the 27th but we had to cancel the wedding until February but now it seems like that isint going to happen either but well see. Good Luck with everything you’ll be fine.

  10. Member
    mholden 167 posts, Blushing bee @ 3:25 pm

    This happened to me exactly three weeks ago. I was unexpectedly laid off with about eight months to go before the wedding. Luckily, my parents are helping cover the cost of the wedding and our venue and caterer don’t require payment until after the wedding.

    I’ll be interested to see how this affects the planning long-term (for you and for me).

  11. Guest
    39bride, Guest @ 3:26 pm

    I had a cutback on pay and insurance coverage about four weeks after we got engaged. It amounted to 25% cut in take-home pay. At the time I was living with my mother and we were splitting expenses. After I got done with my freakout and stopped swearing that we were going to do what we’d always wanted to do (a courthouse wedding), she came to my rescue and said that for the next three months (until the wedding, when I’d obviously move out) she was covering all household expenses except groceries. It was absolutely amazing how it all worked out (six months before she wouldn’t have been able to do that). Hopefully you had some pleasant surprises with your financial strains, too!

  12. Member
    Beaukat 317 posts, Helper bee @ 3:57 pm

    My FI just lost his job and we’ve had to put a hold on all things wedding until he finds a new one.

    It puts a damper on the schedule, but there was no talk of cancelling.

    At least, he didn’t say anything to me :)

  13. Member
    Mrs. Otter 1321 posts, Bumble bee @ 4:02 pm

    Thank you ALL for your comments and for sharing your stories! I’ve been able to do freelance work while I’m searching for something that is full time, and since our families have been so generous we won’t be missing on TOO much – though we definitely cut some of the extras that we didn’t need. I think though that if they were so easy to cut, maybe we didn’t need them to begin with. ;)

    Most importantly: I’m much happier now than I was at that job, even with the stressful job search! So it will all work out (eventually) and until then, we’ll be budgeting like crazy!

  14. Member
    Mrs. Pony 9265 posts, Buzzing Beekeeper @ 5:11 pm

    I lost my job about a month before our wedding and even though I knew it was coming, it was still hard. Wishing you luck finding a new job, everything will work out in the end!

  15. Member
    texasaggiemom 594 posts, Busy bee @ 7:58 pm

    So sorry to hear what you’re going through, but sounds like you have a good support system through your family and FI. I was laid off from a job the week I returned from my honeymoon, which was completely unexpected. If I had known it was coming, I would have definitely cut wedding expenses, but my boss “didn’t want to ruin my wedding.” Ummm…thanks? Hoping for the best for you – hugs from Texas!

  16. Member
    Mrs. Panda 1329 posts, Bumble bee @ 1:02 pm

    money is by far the worst part about wedding planning and life just never makes it very easy. I’m glad you’re at least happier without the job, and I hope it’ll get easier!

  17. Member
    jacofblues 1468 posts, Bumble bee @ 3:35 am

    Yup money is the devil! As much as I wanted to avoid it I do think we are going to be paying off our wedding for a few months after it ends!

  18. Member
    littlemrschatterbox 49 posts, Newbee @ 12:34 am

    My husband lost his job 2.5 months before our $30,000 wedding. I nearly lost it… thought about cancelling, postponing, or re-planning. In the end we did our day exactly as planned, and while we’ll be paying it off for a while I got exactly what I always dreamed of, it was fabulous, and I don’t regret it one bit!

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